07/05/2026
Some people think that domestic abuse stops after separation/divorce. It does not. The violence continues sometimes in other or worst forms than before. The flashbacks, nightmares, insults, calomny, financial witholding of what the court granted, threats of attacks in court to take back the children she tried to protect by seeking divorce, or to get a hold on the business she built on her own... All of this continue. Worst, 3/4 of women who die by femenicide by a former violent ex are killed in the first year following separation.
But the harassment can unfortunately go on for years... The violent person trying in every way he can think off to cut off her wings with which she took her freedom without his consent. He was so displeased with her while they are married, yet refused to grant her the divorce. And the ruling by the judges is not sufficient for him. He, has to be the one continuing to call the shots. And if he is prevented, that is why one day he may pull the trigger and shoot her one last time.
In the Muslim context, some men may withold from causing death, unwilling to go to hell due to her (of course in his mind only her is the evil witch who deserves to burn on hell), but nevertheless can try every course to make her life a living hell.
Women face many societal and systemic barriers to get the peace and freedom they deserve when they have a partner with violent tendencies. I think that it should be mandatory that every case of domestic violence should have a clause in the ruling to force men to at least 15 sessions of mandatory individual psychotherapy held by a qualified psychologist and an additional 5 sessions of group therapy held by a qualified psychologist or social worker.
My sister, you have been through a lot and you are much more than a survivor, you are a warrior for your own dignity, freedom and peace.
Keep it going girl! ✊️😍
May God bless and protect us.
In sincerity and solidarity,
Geneviève Lepage, PhD
Doctor in Psychology,
EMDR Accredited Practitioner