05/05/2025
This is Margot, she’s my only grandchild, she’s 3 years old and she is the greatest joy in my life bar none❣️
In this picture she’s jumping up and down, making little poses while singing on top of her lungs.
Now see, this is how (at least many of us) we used to be - free to express ourselves without any self consciousness, moving our bodies in ways that was fun and felt good and creating our own happy little moments whenever we could. We instinctively knew what movement felt good, both in our bodies and in our feelings. We naturally sought out ways of being that increased our wellbeing, like a flower following the sun. But at some point, many of us stopped doing that.
We got busy with life, such as work, family, friends, hobbies and home care obligations. We started adulting and paid much more attention to what was happening outside of us rather than what’s happening inside of us. On top of that, we may have had experiences that were so painful that we needed to block them out and the older we got, we have many more of those.
And this is where it gets tricky: blocking out painful events is a very useful and fairly easy tool to use and it has been immensely useful as we continue to adult. The other side of that coin however, is firstly; it’s not an easy on/off switch. The blocking-things-out becomes a semi permanent state that takes conscious effort to get out off. Secondly, when we block things off, we actually don’t know how we are doing, because, you know, we are blocking things out. So we think we’re ok but truthfully, we don’t know because we cant feel it. 🤷♀️
In family constellations we see this all the time. And it is so obvious when a system is frozen because the representatives in the constellation literally can’t move. It’s like they are stuck in the position they’re in. This always always happens because there has been a great tragedy at some point and the grief & trauma that follows renders the members unable to move. They are frozen in time.
So even if the person didn’t actually experience the tragedy, they still carry part of that frozeness as children and later on as adults while adding their own “new & improved” blockages to their bodies.
Thankfully, there are many things that can be done to change this. Constellation workshops, therapy, yoga, breathing exercises and all the other stuff we nowadays have access too. Then there is also this; reaching in and embracing that little child in us that knows how to move our bodies in ways that makes us feel good.
Do it today - make your Margot moment. ❤️
