14/11/2025
Recently, my 2 years 10 months old is a little bit worried.
He said (in Foochow dialect), “jin gin diong… jin giang meh ABC…”
(Nervous… afraid I don’t know ABC.)
His friends at daycare can already recognize their ABCs, and he feels scared because he can’t. I just laughed off his anxiety, but of course, as an Asian parent, I started teaching him ABCs...
However, I realised something important from this: our parents are feeling pressured to teach academic skills, way before their children are ready, some as early as 3 months old.
The truth is, at this age, ABC recognition is not the real priority.
What truly shapes a child’s future are the invisible skills developing quietly underneath—skills far more important than early academics.
The 3 Core Skills That Matter Most Before Age 5:
1. Focus
A child who can concentrate, play deeply, and stay with a task learns faster later on. Activities like drawing, stacking blocks, pouring water, or playing pretend build this far more effectively than memorising letters.
2. Language — the foundation of learning
Talking, narrating, and taking turns in conversation grow the architecture of the brain. Every time we describe what our child is doing (“You’re building a tall tower… now it wobbles… you fixed it!”) we expand their vocabulary, social skills, and confidence.
3. Confidence — the engine for independence
Children thrive when they feel safe to explore, try, fail, try again, and discover their abilities. Confidence—not early academic success—is what predicts resilience and problem-solving later in life.
My child may not recognise all his ABCs yet.
But he is learning how to focus, how to express himself, and how to keep trying even when something feels hard.
And these are the foundations that truly matter.
