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HerTazkiyah, Abuja (2025)

23/11/2024

"And among the people is he who says,

'Our Lord, give us in this world,' and he will have in the Hereafter no share.

But among them is he who says, 'Our Lord, give us in this world (that which is) good and in the Hereafter (that which is) good and protect us from the punishment of the Fire."

(Surah Baqarah, verses 200 & 201)

Whether we explicitly say these Du'as or not, with every breath we take and every decision we make, we are shaping our priorities.

Islam encourages a life of fulfillment in this world without neglecting the ultimate purpose of our existence: attaining Allaah’s pleasure and salvation in the Hereafter.

So, habibti, take a pause and reflect on your daily choices.

Are you mindful of this balance?
Are you aligning your actions with what truly benefits you in both worlds?
Do you focus solely on fleeting worldly pleasures, forgetting the eternal life to come? Or do you seek goodness both in this world and the Hereafter?

18/11/2024

The secret to a Barakah-filled day lies in its morning!

The Messenger of Allah, ﷺ, prayed: "Allaahmumma baarik li ummati fi bukuriha"
{O Allah, bless for my Ummah its early mornings}

This du’aa highlights for us the immense blessings hidden in the early hours of the day, and as Muslims, we are encouraged to seek them.

This is a science-backed Sunnah: the morning hours are when our minds are most alert, our bodies most refreshed, and our souls most receptive to gratitude and reflection.

Waking up with purpose transforms the start of the day. When we begin our morning with the intention of pleasing Allaah, our actions take on a meaningful direction. Saying the morning adhkaar, making heartfelt du’as, and reflecting on the goals of the day help stay grounded in gratitude and mindfulness.

It can reduce the anxiety of a scattered mind and replace it with clarity and focus. It allows us to see our day as a gift rather than a burden, setting a positive emotional tone for whatever lies ahead.

Asbahna wa-asbahal-mulku liLlaah walhamdu liLlaah!

07/11/2024

Here is a reminder to stay true to our unique Islāmic identity amidst the noise of conformity

To remain steadfast on the pristine path even when it seems lonely and strange.

Sometimes, the well trodden roads lead to destruction.

02/10/2024

BUILDING EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE FROM A YOUNG AGE.

Emotional intelligence is the ability to understand and manage one's own emotions, as well as the emotions of others.

Building emotional intelligence in children begins with teaching self-awareness i.e, helping children recognize and name their emotions, thoughts and behaviours.

This is the foundation of emotional intelligence.The earlier children understand what they are feeling, the better equipped they’ll be to manage those feelings in healthy ways.

This may sound simple, but it's one of the most critical steps in emotional development. From a young age, children experience a range of emotions—happiness, frustration, fear, excitement—but they often don’t have the language to express what they’re feeling. Here is where you come in as the parent.

Imagine your child being upset because their favorite toy is broken. Instead of dismissing their emotions with a quick "It’s okay, don’t cry," (or worse still, spanking them for breaking the toy 👀) try to validate and label what they’re feeling: “I see that you’re really sad that your toy is broken. It’s okay to feel sad about that.”

This simple act of labeling will help your child make sense of their emotions and reassures them that it’s normal to feel upset.

When your child knows that it’s safe to express their feelings and that those feelings are valid, they begin to build emotional awareness.

Over time, they learn not just to name their emotions but also to understand what triggers them. This emotional vocabulary becomes the foundation for managing their emotions in healthy ways.
...TO BE CONTINUED IN THE NEXT EPISODE.....

©️ HerTazkiyah

22/09/2024

MAKE WE TALK ABOUT ANXIETY. WETIN E REALLY MEAN?

Anxiety na strong feeling of worry or fear wey person go dey feel, especially when dem dey think about something wey dem no fit control or something wey dem dey fear say go happen. This kind feeling dey happen to everybody sometimes, like when you get big event or you dey face something wey important for your life. But for some people, this feeling dey come too much, and e fit turn to problem wey dey affect dem everyday life.

Anxiety no be just normal worry wey go come and go. When person get anxiety, the worry go dey constant, and e go feel like say e no get solution. The person mind go dey overthink things wey never even happen or dey expect say something bad go happen, even when e no get any proof.

For some people, anxiety fit dey linked to specific things like exams, public speaking, or meeting new people. But for others, e no get one particular thing wey dey trigger the anxiety. E fit be say dem just dey feel anxious and dem sef nor know why. This one fit make person feel frustrated because dem no fit understand wetin exactly dey cause the feeling.

Anxiety dey affect person emotionally. When e don take over, e go make person feel overwhelmed. The person go dey feel fear or panic for small small things wey normally no suppose cause worry. The person mind go dey full of "what if" questions, and e go hard to relax or calm down. This kind emotional tension fit lead to frustration, irritability, and sometimes even tears.

This anxiety wey we dey talk so,
fit affect everyday life through sleep. Person wey get anxiety fit find am hard to sleep well. When e lie down, him mind no go rest; e go begin replay different worries. The constant thinking fit make person dey awake for hours or wake up plenty times for night. Without good sleep, the body no go rest well, and the person go wake up tired, which fit make the anxiety worse.
....WE GO CONTINUE FOR NEXT EPISODE...

©️ HerTazkiyah

21/09/2024

TRIALS INCLUDE BOTH THE GOOD AND THE UGLY .

When we hear “trials,” we usually think of hardship -loss, pain, and difficulty. But in reality, trials come in many forms. Often, we overlook that ease, wealth, health, and success can be just as much of a test as hardship.

Allaah, Subhanahu wa Ta'ala, tells us in Surah Al-Anbiya, verse 35: “And We shall surely try you with good and evil by way of test, and to Us you will be returned.”

This points to the fact that both blessings and difficulties are a means of testing our character and faith.

In times of ease, it’s easy to forget that we are being tested. Happiness, comfort, and status can lead to a sense of independence and entitlement, making us forget our dependence on Allaah. The real trial in these blessings is whether we remain humble, grateful, and generous.

Do we remember to give others from what we've been blessed with, or do we hoard it, thinking it’s solely by our own effort that we have attained it? Gratitude in prosperity is often a bigger test than patience in adversity, because it requires conscious acknowledgment that ALL good comes from Allaah.

On the other hand, trials of hardship often come with clear signs of testing—whether through loss, illness, or personal struggles. These types of trials clearly test our Sabr and Tawakkul. They force us to confront our limitations and seek comfort in turning to Allaah. We are reminded that this world is temporary, and through difficulty, our hearts may detach from dunya and find solace in the hope of eternal ease with Allaah.

The good and the ugly both serve a divine purpose. In them,we are given a chance to either draw closer to Him or to drift away.

Whether in ease or difficulty, the ultimate goal remains the same: to live our lives in submission to Allaah, recognizing that He is the source of all good and His Wisdom is all encompassing.

©️ HerTazkiyah

15/09/2024

PEOPLE GO WHINE YOU, DISAPPOINTMENT SEF GO WAN SHAKE YOU, BUT NO PANIC.

Our relationship with people no dey always go as we plan. Family o, friends o, or even partner, disappointment fit show face when di people we care about no meet our expectations or when things no go as we hope. This kind disappointment fit cause emotional pain wey go affect our peace of mind. But di truth be say, disappointment na part of life, and learning how to handle am na important skill wey go fit help keep mental health intact.

E dey important make you understand say expectations dey natural for relationships. We dey expect love, loyalty, honesty, and support from di people we care about. But sometimes, people no fit meet those expectations, either because dem no understand wetin we want, or dem just no get the ability to give am at that moment. When this kind thing happen, disappointment fit enter, but e no mean say di relationship don scatter.

One way wey you fit handle disappointment na to accept the fact say no be every time things go go as you want. Life no perfect, and people no perfect too. E dey helpful to remind yourself say di person wey disappoint you no be bad person, dem just be human, and humans dey make mistakes. Try show understanding and compassion, to di person yourself join.

For any relationship, communication na key. Instead make you dey bottle up your disappointment or to dey assume say di person suppose know wetin dey wrong, try talk about how you feel. Express your emotions in a calm and respectful way. Tell di person how their actions or words make you feel without blaming them. This one go fit help clear the air and reduce any tension or misunderstanding.

Another thing wey fit help be to lower your expectations sometimes. No be to say you no suppose expect good things from people, but if you dey always expect perfection, disappointment go follow. Try to accept people as dem be, everybody get their own flaws. This mindset go help you reduce di feeling of constant disappointment.

Lastly, no forget to take care of yourself emotionally. Disappointment fit cause pain, but na you no go allow make dat pain consume you. Find healthy ways to release your emotions. Make sure say you prioritize your mental health, no matter di situation.

Disappointment na part of human relationships. But if you learn how to handle am well, e go help you maintain your peace of mind and keep your relationships stronger.

11/09/2024

LET CHILDREN PLAY; IT'S IMPORTANT FOR THEIR MENTAL HEALTH.

Play is often seen as just a way for children to have fun, but it’s also a important aspect of their mental and emotional development.

It is a powerful tool for learning and development, as it allows children to explore their environment, practice social skills, and express their emotions in a safe and controlled way.

Whether it's imaginative play, physical activity, or different kinds of game, these activities help children develop cognitive abilities, emotional regulation, and social skills that are essential for mental health.

Through play, they learn about themselves and their emotions, how to navigate social relationships, resolve conflicts, and develop empathy.

For instance, role-playing games allow children to step into different characters, helping them understand different perspectives and emotions. Physical play, like running or climbing, not only supports physical health but also helps in the release of pent-up energy and stress, contributing to emotional well-being.

Another point worth noting is how play also serves as a mechanism for coping with difficult emotions. Children often use play to process experiences that they don't fully understand or to deal with fears and anxieties. When you engage in play with your children, it strengthens the bond and provides opportunities for them to feel supported and understood, further strengthening their mental health.

So, dear mamas, when you see your child playing, don't dismiss it as mere distraction or noise. Instead, recognize it as their way of making sense of the world. Join in when you can, showing them that you are present and willing to support them through their emotional journey.

Play is not just fun; it’s a window into their hearts and minds, and by participating, you build a deeper connection that can nurture their mental and emotional well-being.

08/09/2024

TAKE A BREAK MAKE YOU FOR NO BREAK DOWN.

I understand say you dey hustle, dey chase one thing or another. From family to work to personal matters, e get as e go be, you go feel say you need to handle everything at once. But if you no take care, you fit push yourself too far until your bodi and mind no fit carry the load again. Na why e important make you take a break before you break down.

Sometimes, we dey think say taking a break mean we dey lazy or we no strong enough. But the truth be say, even the strongest person fit reach breaking point if dem no rest. When you no take time to pause, your bodi and mind go begin show you signs like constant tiredness, stress, headaches, and even feelings of frustration or hopelessness. This na your bodi way of telling you, "I need rest."

To avoid breakdown, start to dey listen to your bodi. When you dey feel tired, no force yourself to continue. Take small breaks throughout your day, even if na five minutes to stretch your bodi, breathe well, or drink water. These small pauses fit refresh your mind and give you new strength to continue.

Also, no be only your bodi need break; your mind need am too. Find time to do things wey dey help you relax. E fit be reading, listening to Qur'an, praying, or just to sit down quietly. Anything wey go make your mind calm down, make you no overlook am. Taking care of your mind na part of your overall well-being.

Another thing be say, no feel guilty to rest. Rest no be luxury; na necessity. You no fit pour from inside empty cup, so if you no take time to recharge, you no go get the energy to take handle your responsibilities well well.

Even Prophet Muhammad (SAW) teach us say, "Your body has a right over you." Wetin e mean be say rest dey part of your duty to yourself.

So, my sister, no wait until your bodi or mind don reach breaking point before you decide to pause. Take a break before you break down. Rest well, recharge, and you go come back stronger, ready to face the world again.

04/09/2024

LAYING THE FOUNDATION OF MENTAL HEALTH IN EARLY CHILDHOOD.

Early childhood is a critical period where the foundation of mental health is laid. The experiences a child has in these formative years can shape their emotional, psychological, and social development for the rest of their lives.

During the first few years of life, a child’s brain is developing rapidly, with millions of neural connections forming every second.

These years are when children are most impressionable, absorbing the world around them like a sponge. The relationships they form with their caregivers, the environment they are exposed to, and even the challenges they face all contribute to the development of their mental and emotional health.

For example, a child who grows up in a nurturing and supportive environment, where their needs are consistently met, is likely to develop a strong sense of security and self-worth. This sets the foundation for healthy relationships and emotional resilience as they grow older.

Positive experiences, such as loving interactions with caregivers, play, and exploration in a safe environment, promote cognitive, mental, emotional, and social development.

On the other hand, a child who experiences neglect, inconsistency, or trauma may develop a more fragile sense of self, leading to difficulties in managing emotions, forming relationships, and coping with stress.

Adverse experiences, such as exposure to violence, neglect, or emotional unavailability from parents/ guardians, can disrupt this development, leading to long-term challenges in cognitive, mental, emotional, and social development.

Think about your own childhood.
Were there key experiences that shaped your mental and emotional well-being- positively or negatively? Kindly share your thoughts with us in the comment section.

01/09/2024

Try dey find joy for inside small small things.

For this life wey we dey, we dey always look for big things to make us happy. But true happiness no dey always come from big events or major achievements.

Sometimes, na for the small small things wey we overlook, we fit find joy wey go make our heart sweet. E dey important make we learn how to find joy for inside little things, because na dem dey give us the daily happiness we need to live a fulfilled life.

One way you fit find joy in little things na to appreciate the present moment. Instead of always thinking about wetin go happen tomorrow or the things wey never happen, try make you focus on wetin dey happen now.

E fit be breeze wey dey blow, the taste of your favorite food, or even the sound of rain for roof. When you dey pay attention to the present, you go start to notice the small small things wey fit bring you joy.

Another way be say you fit cultivate gratitude every day, try make you think about at least one thing wey you dey grateful for. E no need be big thing; e fit just be smile from a friend, or the fact say you get clean water to drink. When you dey practice gratitude, you go dey see how blessed you dey, and this one go make you appreciate the small joys of life.

You fit also find joy in little things by slowing down your pace. Life dey rush, but you no need rush with am. Take time to enjoy the little things around you. For example, instead of rushing your morning tea or coffee, take time to savor am. Smell the aroma, feel the warmth, and enjoy the taste. These small moments of mindfulness fit bring you plenty joy.

Make you dey kind to yourself and others. Whether na to give person compliment, help a friend, or to rest when you need am. These little acts of kindness dey create positive energy wey go make your heart happy.

My sister, learn to find joy in little things, and you go see say your life go begin sweet well well.

28/08/2024

YOUR MENTAL HEALTH MATTERS AND WE'RE HERE TO SUPPORT YOU!.

Reserve a seat for yourself at the Muslimah Mental Health Roundtable to connect with experts, share experiences, and learn practical tools to enhance your mental well-being.

Don't miss this empowering event!

https://tinyurl.com/Mental-Health-Roundtable

HerTazkiyah

23/11/2024

18/11/2024

07/11/2024

02/10/2024

22/09/2024

21/09/2024

15/09/2024

11/09/2024

08/09/2024

04/09/2024

01/09/2024

28/08/2024

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