You and YOUR Relationship

19/11/2017

Everything in this life is operated by a law.
Wat we call GRACE is also a law in the spirit.
GRACE was brought about by a form of constitutional amendment in heaven. God saw that man can not become righteous by himself, so HE put GRACE in place to cater for our inefficiencies...
And the idea of GRACE wasn't just born after the death of Christ, because it was revealed in the garden of Eden of the kind of law that will operate in this time.
What we call the law of Moses was a shadow of the law of GRACE. Father Abraham never walked by the law of Moses but of Grace. He met with the high priest Melchizedek(christ of the New Testament).
The law of GRACE does not cancel ur responsibilities to live in the will of God (because of ur will power-choice).

22/07/2017

Abeg read

WHAT IS THE WILL OF GOD/HOW DO I KNOW THE WILL OF GOD?

I will start by discussing the prevailing misconceptions about God's will, before we then examine what is the will of God. Please read slowly and patiently to the end of this message for full understanding:

Many people pray often about the will of God. Everyone wants to know and be in the will of God. Paul also prayed for the Colossian church that they may be filled with the knowledge of God’s will and told the Ephesian church the need to understand the will of God.

“For this reason, since the day we heard about you, we have not stopped praying for you. We continually ask God to fill you with the KNOWLEDGE OF HIS WILL through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives,” Colossians 1:9
“Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what THE LORD'S WILL is''. Ephesians 5:17

So, what is the will of God for me? What is the will of God for my marriage and my home? What is the will of God for my career and ministry? What is the will of God for the church? What is the will of God about what job to do and where to live? These are regular questions many people seek answers for all their lives.

As usual, religion makes the topic to become so complicated. In fact, they talk about different type of the will of God, perfect will of God, permissive will of God, progressive will of God, excessive will of God. Lol etc.
So many people have been deceived that their marriage is not working because their life partner is not the perfect will of God, but permissive will of God. This error has led to unnecessary divorce, needless change of job, and all sorts of negativism – all blamed on the will of God.

DEBUNKING THE CONCEPT OF PERMISSIVE WILL OF GOD.
A lot of believers have been taught there is a perfect will of God and there is permissive will of God. They tell you that the perfect will of God is the original will of God for you but if you reject that, then God will permit you to take your own choice, so at that time, you stop being in the perfect will of God but in the permissive will of God.
The common example they give is when the Israelites asked Samuel for kings and he told them that since they reject God as their kings, he would give them kings that will cause a lot of evils in the land. Therefore, according to them, that was permissive will of God, because God permitted them their request. I used to believe this too for a long time until I got a better understanding of the Bible.

The Truth is that there is NOTHING like permissive will of God in the Bible, such terms were coined by religious folks in other to make up for their inadequate theology about the will of God, it is totally unscriptural. They usually use Romans 12:2 to back up that theology. Let us examine Romans 12:2

DOES ROMANS 12:2 CLASSIFY THE WILL OF GOD AS PERFECT OR PERMISSIVE?
This verse has been wrongly interpreted as classifying some of God’s will as perfect or permissive. This is a big error of misinterpretation and reading your thought into the Bible. We are going to read the verse and you will see clearly Paul never classified the will of God as perfect or imperfect. Let’s go.

Romans 12:2
“And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that GOOD, and ACCEPTABLE, and PERFECT, will of God.” (KJV)

“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is GOOD, and ACCEPTABLE, and PERFECT.” (ESV)

“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—HIS GOOD, PLEASING AND PERFECT WILL”.” (NIV)

So, our dear religious folks say that since the Bible verse above mention perfect will of God, that means there must be imperfect will of God which they call permissive –an example of what the Bible never said (reading your thought into the Bible).

To simply debunk that theory: Remember the verse also mentioned, GOOD AND ACCEPTABLE will of God. That means there must also be BAD WILL OF GOD AND UNACCEPTABLE WILL OF GOD, since there is good and acceptable will of God. So, let me ask: Are you in the bad or unacceptable will of God?..... lol.. That is how ridiculous that interpretation is.

WHAT IS ROMANS 12:2 SAYING?
THE VERSE IS SIMPLY GIVING THE CHARACTERISTICS OF THE WILL OF GOD – THAT THE WILL OF GOD IS PERFECT, THE WILL OF GOD IS GOOD AND THE WILL OF GOD IS ACCEPTABLE. DO YOU GET THAT? There is nothing like perfect and imperfect will of God. Once it is imperfect, it is not the will of God. Because the will of God is perfect. The will of God is contained in the Word of God.

THINK ABOUT THE WILL OF GOD AS “A WILL” – A LEGAL DOCUMENT SHOWING HOW A MAN WANTS HIS INHERITANCE TO BE SHARED. SO THE WILL OF GOD IS EXACTLY GOD’S LEGAL DOCUMENTS ON WHAT HE WANTS YOU TO HAVE FROM HIM.

And James 1:17 says “GOOD AND PERFECT GIFTS COME FROM THE FATHER OF LIGHT, WITH WHO THERE IS NO VARIATION OR SHADOW OF TURNING"
You see that? THE WILL OF GOD FOR YOU IS GOOD, PERFECT AND ACCEPTABLE.

Note the following points about the will of God:
1. The will of God is definite. It can be known. It is ALREADY REVEALED.
2. It is either something is God's will or it is not God's will. You are either in God’s will or you are not. No middle ground. (Please don’t start judging yourself until you finish this note)
3. The fact that something happened does not make it God's will.
4. The fact that God’s prophets prophesied something does not make it God's will. Prophecy is for the purpose of awareness; it does NOT mean God stamps it as His will or He causes it. He only reveals it.
5. For instance, ALL EVILS THAT HAPPEN ON THE EARTH IS NOT GOD'S WILL. GOD DOES NOT DO EVIL. Jesus is the EXPRESS IMAGE of God the Father. Whatsoever you cannot find in Jesus, you cannot find in God.
6. THE WILL OF GOD IS THAT ALL WILL BE SAVED. Any sinner that is not saved is not God's will.
7. Sickness, poverty etc are not God's will...
8. However, God can work ALL THINGS for the good of those who love Him, even those things that were not HIs will, He can work them out for the good of His children.
9. James 1:13 says "God does not tempt anyone with evil…” Satan does.
10. Let us stop using terminologies that are not consistent with the Bible.. There are things we all pass through as believers which are not palatable. They are not the will of God. However, God can work through those things for our good.

DIFFERENTIATING BETWEEN THE PROCESS AND THE WILL OF GOD.
The main error in understanding this topic is that people have lumped two different concepts together: THE PROCESS AND THE WILL OF GOD. They often regard the processes as the Will of God. The processes are what culminate that eventually leads to experiencing the Will of God. They are not the will of God themselves.

For example: When God told Joseph he would get to the throne, that was the will of God for Joseph. Joseph was thrown into the pit, that was just a process. He was sold into slavery and later thrown into the prison, all those were not the will of God, they were just processes.

We have often been told that you must go through pit, prison, slavery, to ascend to the throne. Because of that theology, whenever God gave people success without stress, they believe that is probably not God. Because they did not go through, pit, slavery or prison and they became the king.

All those were not God’s will for Joseph, they were only processes. And processes are HIGHLY FLEXIBLE. God could have provided another means of making Joseph the Prime minister. His brothers did not have to put him in pit or sell him as prisoner to help God fulfill His will.. NOPE.

But since they did that, GOD THEN WORKED IT OUT FOR THE GOOD OF JOSEPH… REMEMBER, Romans 8:28 says GOD WORKS ALL THINGS (ALL PROCESSES) TOGETHER FOR THE GOOD OF THEM THAT LOVE HIM AND ARE CALLED ACCORDING TO HIS GOOD PURPOSE. ALLELUJAH!!!

Another Example: Israelites asked for kings. Was it God’s will for them to have kings or for Samuel and his families to continue ruling them? NEITHER. THE WILL OF GOD WAS FOR THEM TO BE A NATION SEPARATED UNTO GOD, NO MATTER WHO WAS RULING THEM. So whether they had kings or priests as their rulers, God’s will was simple, clear and direct: for them to be His own people and He being their God, for them to live a dedicated life to the only true God. Do you get this?

So, the issue of having kings or not having kings are only processes, not the will of God itself. NOW CONSIDER THIS, EVEN WHILE SAMUEL WAS ALIVE, BEFORE THEY ASKED FOR KINGS, THE ISRAELITES WERE SINNING AGAINST GOD. THEY WERE NOT LIVING OUT THE WILL OF GOD, SO ASKING FOR KINGS WAS SIMPLY PROCESSES. And we will later discuss how to involve God in the processes and how to apply God’s given resources in choosing the right processes of your life.

NOW, WHAT IS THE WILL OF GOD FOR ME?
For instance, it is NOT God's will that you must marry a particular person. No, not at all... But God's will is that YOU HAVE A HAPPY HOME... If you listen to Him and follow His counsel, you can have a happy home EASILY.. But if you follow your own way, you can still make some changes and have a happy home... BUT THE WILL OF GOD REMAINS CONSTANT. IT IS THAT ALL OUR HOMES ARE HEAVEN ON EARTH... Not a particular person to marry - that is only a process.

Does that mean everyone will have a happy home? Probably not. But that does not change God's will. There is no permissive will that some people will not have a happy home. If you don't have a happy home, it is simply not God's will, it has nothing to do with permissive will...

For people who believe it is God's will that they marry a PARTICULAR person, what happens if the person die, like when Pastor Kumuyi’s former wife died? Does that mean they must not marry or remarry? Or if they marry someone else, then are they now in permissive will of God? These are all confusions introduced by religion by not understanding what God calls His will...

HIS WILL IS GOOD, IF IT IS NOT GOOD, IT IS NOT HIS WILL... The processes now are left to us, however, we should seek His guidance to help us in the process of achieving His will, but those guidance themselves are not the will of God, they are simply part of processes. They are just the means to an end, not the end itself... THE WILL OF GOD IS CERTAIN, IT IS PREDICTABLE, IT IS CONSTANT. AND IT IS REVEALED IN HIS WORD – THE LEGAL DOCUMENT.

SOME REVEALED WILL OF GOD:
“John 6:40 "For my Father's will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise them up at the last day.""
Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plan to prosper you and not to harm you. Plan to give you a future and a hope"
2 John 1:2 "I wish above all things that you may prosper and be in health, even as your soul prosper”
“John 6:40 "For my Father's will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise them up at the last day."
1 Timothy 2: 3-4 "This is good and pleasing to God our savior who wants all men to be saved
1 Thessalonians 4:3 "It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality;"
1 Timothy 2: 3-4 "This is good and pleasing to God our savior who wants all men to be saved..."
1 Thessalonians 5:18 "Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you

DIFFERENCES BETWEEN THE WILL OF GOD AND THE PROCESS.
1. The will of God is the Final End. The processes are the way to get to the final end.
2. The will of God is constant, the processes are flexible. This is the biggest one. It is not a particular job or particular sister or brother as wife/husband or a particular career/job… those can be flexible, because they are processes. But the will of God is constant and definite, good and perfect.
3. We can’t control the will of God, it is set. But we have parts to play in the processes.
4. The will of God is already revealed in all parts of our lives. The processes unveil from time to time.

WHAT IS THE BEST PROCESS AND WHO IS RESPONSIBLE?
When it gets to the processes, it is our job to use all God’s given resources to decide which process. For instance, it is your job to figure out what career you want to do, not carelessly, but by applying different God’s given relevant resources.

GOD’S GUIDANCE:
In addition to the all the resources I will discuss below, it is highly advisable to seek God’s guidance. Even though those factors below are mostly accurate and are good pointer, you might miss a blind spot and God will help you out when you seek His guidance.

The goodnews is that God's guidance for our lives is not complicated. It can be as easy as having the inner peace as you think about a particular choice or having the inner witness of the Spirit to your spirit, or hearing a still small voice in your spirit. It does not have to be audible or spetacular.

JOB AND CAREERS:
IN ADDITION TO SEEKING GOD'S DIRECTION THROUGH PRAYERS, you can combine the following God’s given resources to make the right accurate decision.

1. You can use your passion to decide your career. Are you passionate about helping sick people? You can try and go medical field. Are you passionate about animals or helping people learn? You can specialize in animal field or be a teacher like me. Are you passionate about the gospel to the unreached remote places, you can go for missionary or pastorial work. You can follow your passion... That is very good pointer.

2. You can use your natural skills and talents to decide your career. If you are very good in a sport, then you can choose that sport. If you are good in teaching or in academics, then you can teach/ lecture. That is your natural skills. Things you do without any stress, inbuilt natural ability. They are good pointers.

3. You can make economical intelligent decision in deciding your carrier, For me, this is the most important. It may not be important for you. I believe in choosing a carrier that is economically relevant, that people need in a particular area, and in return will earn you good money. I DON’T SPIRITUALISE STUFFS LIKE THAT. I need the money to be able to help more people and sponsor the propagating of the gospel, so I like a good paying job. That is economical decision.

MARRIAGE PARTNER DECISION :
IN ADDITION TO SEEKING GOD'S DIRECTION THROUGH PRAYERS, You can combine the following God’s given resources to make the decision. We can’t go too detail here..

1. You can use “friendship” and relationship skills to decide who to marry. Because I actually discover that it is best you marry your best friend. Marriage is better run as friendship.

2. You can use attraction to determine who to marry. You may just discover you cannot resist the kind of attraction you have for this person, of course a Christian. That may be a good indication.

3. You can use the facts you have, vision compatibility, temperament compatibility, etc.

GOOD AND HAPPY MARRIAGE/ HOME:
Beyond marrying someone compatible or your best friend or God’s will, it is important you know how marriage works. Things don’t run automatically. NOW, GOD’S WILL IS FOR YOU TO HAVE A HAPPY HOME. BUT YOU HAVE PARTS TO PLAY IN THE PROCESSES APART FROM CHOOSING YOUR PARTNER.

You need to personally commit yourself to being selfless, and loving your spouse no matter what. Marriage love works better when you have the heart to give rather than to receive. Marry who you want to love and make happy all the days of your life. And if you are married, decide to make your wife or husband happy no matter the situation.

Never second-guess your spouse. Never entertain the idea that your wife is a permissive will. The choice is just a process and it is flexible. Even if you made a poor choice, with hardwork, you can actually have a happier home than someone who had ANGELIC REVELATION to choose his wife.

I had this close friend who had so much divine visions, revelations, powerful audible voices about his wife while we were in school, it was too divine, he waited for 4 years before proposing. Even when she said no at first, he was so convinced until the sister agreed. However, because they did not take necessary care after marriage, their marriage has become a fatal mess and they have been separated for about 3 years now. This experience saddens my heart so much I am still trusting God to mend their home. I am only citing the example to teach a lesson that choosing the particular person is not the will of God but the great home, And you need to do more than choice to have a good home.

Read books, attend seminars, Plan vacation together. Be romantic. I released a note recently on marriage, married folks should please read that note. Those are the right processes that helps you to fulfill the will of God in marriage.

OTHER IMPORTANT ADVICE ABOUT GOD’S WILL AND THE PROCESSES:
1. Don’t Hyper-spiritualize things. Make intelligent common sense decisions. Jesus washed your sins away, and not your brain. Don’t be religious dummy who is not developed in any other thing than religion. Develop yourself and be informed.

2. Use your sanctified minds to make decisions. You have the mind of Christ. God trusts you enough for you to make a lot of decision. You don’t always have to declare fasting and prayers on every decision.

3. Know that God got your back. He works all things together for your good, because you are called according to His purpose in Christ and His love is perfected in you. Even if you make wrong decisions, you are not out of God’s will. It was just a process in the wrong direction. Work with God to make all things to work together for your good.

4. Never ascribe evil to God or His will. Never. That sickness and pain you have is not His Will. His will is perfect, and good. He does not punish or teach you lessons with sickness. Even if your healing has not manifested, keep trusting God for His will in your health, which is to be in health.

5. If bad things happen to you and people act against you, it is not God’s will. But God will work all things together for your good. IF YOU GO THROUGH PIT, SLAVERY OR PRISON like Joseph, GOD WILL STILL DO WHAT HE WILL DO AND FULFILL HIS WILL IN YOUR LIFE. NEVER GIVE UP ON IT, LIKE JOSEPH DID NOT GIVE UP ON HIS DREAMS.

6. HOWEVER, YOU DON’T HAVE TO GO THROUGH PIT, AND PRISON. YOU ARE NOT JOSEPH, YOU ARE REDEEEMD BY THE BLOOD OF CHRIST.

7. Check different parts of your life. Anything that is not good or perfect is not God’s will. Refuse to accept it. Declare the victory of the cross in that area and actively believe God for a change so you can experience His will in all areas of your life in Jesus name.

8. BE WILLING TO MAKE CHANGES AND TURNS IF/WHEN GOD INTERUPTS YOUR PLAN, IT IS BECAUSE HE KNOWS SOMETHING YOU DON'T KNOW. IT CAN ONLY BE FOR YOUR GOOD, YIELD TO HIS SPIRIT.

I hope you have been so blessed and the light of God had brightened your path on this topic. Keep shinning your light in Christ and enjoy all God has for you. Keep enforcing God’s will in your life by faith in the finished work and by using God’s given resources. And above all, allow the Holy Spirit to guide with His inner peace that passes all understanding in Jesus name. Amen. I love you eternally!!!

Leave us your comments below (let us know the specific that blessed you the most). You are flamboyantly accepted in Christ....

Written by Pastor Adeyemi Favour Aderinto..

Adeyemi Favour Aderinto is a vibrant teacher of God's Word, he teaches the New Testament realities with zeal, accuracy and precision. He also actively engages in personal discipleship.

You can read more posts on the page... And please do share to get others blessed by this post...

22/07/2017

Good morning friends

BEFORE AND AFTER YOU TAKE THE PLUNGE...

1. While praying and fasting faithfully to meet MR or Mrs Right- keep your eyes wide open.

2. Don't be overly sure that you can predict the way your package will arrive. It may not be as glittery as you envisage. Be sensitive and ask for the spirit of discernment

3. Prepare to have a lovely ride but be aware it may be bumpy and the ride may throw you off balance, so fasten your seat belt.

4. there's no one rule for marriage and so the best person to study is your spouse, get ready cos he/she may fluctuate so much so that you question your ability to understand, be determined.

5. If your love is so much before marriage, don't be so carried away, nurture it if not it will die.

6. If at the point of saying I Do, you still aren't sure, don't zoom off, speak about it. That you aren't sure doesn't mean it isn't right. See it as an adventure

7. Do not spend elaborately on the event, plan for your future. Financial problems is a major issue in marriages especially in the first few years if you haven't saved or planned well for any eventuality. The truth is after the event, YOU ARE ON YOUR OWN-be wise

8. The first 3 years may not be as you planned, like any other change in ones life, don't worry, just believe; keep on moving.

9. They say marriage may be a bed of roses, but remember you have to lay that bed yourself-be creative.

10. If you desire your partner to look or appear in a particular way, don't nag; encourage and help with making your desires come true.

11. At the end of the day, your marriage is what you make it.

12. Do not depend on all the fairy tale books on marriage, or the religious books alone. It will never happen until you make it happen. It takes effort. Get ready

13. To men- your wife is an extension of you, what you give may just be what you get in return. But be careful never to make a bitter woman out of your wife- you may not survive it.

14. To Ladies- no matter how much you fall, always make him chase after you- men are good chasers. Build yourself so much so that you remain an asset in recession. Don't let it slide, be in control that is who you are.

15. Above all, Hold unto God but make sure your relationship with God is two-sided. Relationships are awesome when mutual.

16. Do not compare your partner to anyone else, either you accept them or you leave, face it

17. Do not start what will eventually wear you out, marriage is a long road, don't fake it. Be real

18. Saying I do is not a solution to loneliness, don't make that your motive, if not it will hurt.

19. There's no successful marriage without compromise and sacrifice, if you aren't ready...stay off. It takes a real man or woman to commit and sacrifice for the greater good of harmony. If it were that easy they would not be many divorces.

20. Men-3 things will hurt your wife almost all her life; cheating, abuse and disrespect.

21. Ladies- 3 things will make your man feel uneasy around you; nagging, disrespect and cheating.

22. Look at no 20 and 21, the common factors are serious, be aware.

23. Do not take your partner for granted, appreciate every tiny efforts they make. It's difficult to please someone, be grateful.

24. Create time for both of you, regardless of your busy schedules. Don't give excuses, it will ruin your home.

25. Rock your boat in a unique way, be religious but do not destroy the fun in your home with over religiosity - I'm just saying.

These are no rules because honestly no one rule fits all in marriage. Take the advice that applies to you and leave the rest for others.

Note that -Being Single may just be a blessing in disguise, so don't sweat it.

Author: Christiana Stephen (c), 2017.
Editor: Olubunmi Onafuwa
Model: Imomoemi Thompson
For more updates; follow @ www.50amazingmoms.com

19/07/2017

Pls girls/woman learn n be blessed.

08/07/2017

07/07/2017

BIG MISTAKES A LOT OF MEN MAKE IN THEIR RELATIONSHIPS
Everyone makes mistakes; but there are some mistakes that shouldn’t be made. These mistakes can hurt your relationship with your partner, and can make the best of relationships turn sour.
These are some big relationship mistakes a lot of men make:
1. NOT TRYING TO UNDERSTAND HER
Every woman wants to be understood, and the relationship would be better if she’s understood. But a lot of men don’t even make efforts to understand their woman; many don’t even see the need to, and that’s a terrible mistake to make.
2. NOT LISTENING TO HER
It’s when you listen to your lady that you would understand her better and what she wants from the relationship. Listening to her would also prove that you care; but a lot of men make the mistake of not listening to their partner.
3. YOU DON’T SHOWER HER WITH AFFECTION
Showering a woman with affection is probably the easiest way of showing that you love her. When you shower her with affection, her heart would feel loved and cared for.
A lot of men claim to love a woman and can’t even show her affection — that’s a big mistake.
4. NO ATTENTION
Attention makes a woman feel valued; when you give her attention, it shows that you value her and she’s means a lot to you.
The mistake a lot of men make is when they don’t give their lady attention; this would stir up many negative feelings in her.
5. YOU DON’T MAKE HER YOUR PRIORITY
Your lady wants to be the most important thing in your life; she doesn’t want your friends, your hobbies and even your career to seem more important than her. She knows they are important too, but she wants to be the most important; but a lot of men make the mistake of keeping their woman at the background.
6. YOU DON’T CARE ABOUT HER FEELINGS
She has feelings, she has emotions; caring for her means caring for her feelings. If you don’t care about the way she feels, you would definitely hurt her.
7. YOU ARE SELF-CENTRED
This has to be one of the biggest mistakes men make in their relationship — SELF. When you think of just yourself and put yourself first; you aren’t only hurting your lady, but the relationship as well.
8. GETTING ANGRY TOO EASILY
Of course, in a relationship, you are bound to annoy yourselves and get angry at each other. However, a lot of men take this too far; they get angry at the slightest thing and fail to control their temper.
9. DISRESPECTING HER
When you insult your lady, you disrespect her; when you deride her in front of others, you disrespect her; when you don’t care about her opinions, you disrespect her; when you hit her, you disrespect her.
10. NOT BUILDING TRUST
Trust is an important part of the relationship; when it’s lacking, the relationship would be filled with chaos. When trust is present, there would be peace. A lot of men aren’t trustworthy, and that’s a huge mistake.
11. NO COMMUNICATION
You ought to communicate with the woman in your life; you ought to talk to her and not talk about her. When you communicate with her, it would be easier to build love and understanding.
12. YOU DON’T VALUE WHAT SHE DOES FOR YOU
When you take her for granted, in spite of the things she does for you, and you don’t appreciate her role in your life — you are making a huge mistake.
These mistakes are made by a lot of men in their marriages and relationships, and these mistakes can tear your relationship apart.

04/07/2017

Be kind enough to send or give heartfelt gifts to ur spouse...

04/07/2017

THERE'S NOTHING LOVE CANNOT DO

I'm sure we all are not ignorant of the argument these days surrounding the roles of a man and a woman in marriage. Calistus says, "I will never have anything to do with cooking or any form of domestic chore when I'm married. My responsibility is simply to provide, and that's all." Ngozi, a career lady, says, "I am working, he's working, why should I be the only one to do the cooking and domestic chores around the house? After all, my money is also entering into the family's expenses. We must share all the responsibilities, otherwise..." The argument is hot, don't let us even start. You know it all.

Now, my question is, where did all that argument emanate from? Did it come from a place of competition? Did it come from a place of equality? What is the basis for the argument, and where are we drawing our conclusions from and where are we going with it? And more importantly, which is obviously the reason for this article, where is love in all of that? And if I may add, where is God in all of it?

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I am not interested in any form of argument, neither do I have any intention of stirring up any. I come in peace, and my aim is to bring a solution if it might by any means help our homes.
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There's absolutely nothing love cannot do. God tried reconciling the world back to Himself with all the strategies in His arsenal, but nothing worked until He used love. Love brought the King of kings down to earth to walk like an ordinary man. Love caused the Creator of all things, a personality beyond mortality, to die like a mere animal—a death common to all. Only love could have pulled that stunt on that cross that Jesus died—only love could have done it. Ladies and gentlemen, there is no force on earth that is greater than the force of love. If you are a Christian, I assume you know that already.

On that love foundation my brothers and sisters is the foundation of all marriages based. Why then do we have all the arguments in our marriages today? Because we've taken our eyes away from the cross, away from the foundation, away from His word, away from the beginning, away from love!

Love isn't careful about gender inequality. If love turned God into a man, then love can turn a man into a woman. If love made God switch roles from being God to being a man because it was necessary, then a man can do what a woman is "supposed to do" when it's necessary—and of course, a woman can do what a man is "supposed to do" when it is necessary. To stretch it even further, if love could "kill" God, then we can die to self that the marriage may progress. Necessity, they say, is the mother of invention; if it is necessary, don't argue, instead invent yourself and move on!

In the end, God is still God today, man still remains a man, and they all function well in their capacities. Be comfortable with who you've been created to be, let the word of God be the basis for every decision that you take concerning your marriage. This new world philosophies won't take your marriage anywhere. It's the same old rugged cross that brings men salvation today. In the same vein, that ancient love, the unconditional love, is what you need for a successful marriage.

In the words of Paul the Apostle as inspired by the Holy Spirit, "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonour others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres." This kind of love can do anything, and it is this love that I recommend to you today.

I hope you accept it, I hope you put it to work for you, and I seriously hope it ends all the arguments.

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Fan your thoughts into flames and let the world feel the heat.

Effiong Edentekhe,
The Word Carpenter™

PS: You can follow this author on Facebook at Effiong Edentekhe for more of his Word Carpentry.

PPS: Check out OUR OTHER AMAZING RELATIONSHIP POSTS by THE SAME AUTHOR. THEY ARE ALL A MUST READ! You will be WOWED! And it's a promise, YOUR RELATIONSHIPS WILL NEVER REMAIN THE SAME AGAIN.

Love is Not Enough http://bit.ly/2n1Mg9c

The Myth of Finding a Soulmate http://bit.ly/2nfQFaH

Why Do You Want To Get Married http://bit.ly/2mJj311

The Pillar Of Purpose In Marriage http://bit.ly/2o0IIEj

The Pillar of Time in Marriage http://bit.ly/2ntGkZn

Don't Marry a Baby Christian, Marry a Matured Christian http://bit.ly/2ntsohG

Over Familiarity: One Reason Why You May Still Be Single http://bit.ly/2n7x7EJ

The Indispensable Joker for Marital Bliss http://bit.ly/2mJie8k

The Love Accident http://bit.ly/2mmyDUK

Cohabitation And It's Evils Part 1 http://bit.ly/2n7xHm4

Cohabitation And It's Evils Part 2 http://bit.ly/2nLHWe1

Uncensored: Forbidden Fruit And Fringe Benefits http://bit.ly/2nEmPxB

If He Hasn't Said So, Don't Assume So
http://bit.ly/2n1NAsG

Don't Hide It From Them http://bit.ly/2nLSKJf

Get That Unclear Relationship Defined http://bit.ly/2o0NmCb

Have Ye Not Read? http://bit.ly/2nlDu7Q

The Lady, Her Dressing and Her Worth http://bit.ly/2nxc4fD

Wake Up And Smell The Coffee http://bit.ly/2o0IFZb

RESPECT MEN: One Way To Marry Faster Than You Think http://bit.ly/2nlQFWj

Get A Goal Book; Marry Like A Dream http://bit.ly/2oeXeHI

Your Words And How They May Be Hindering Your Getting Married Soon. http://bit.ly/2o0Ko0f

Cricize Your Parent's Marriage For Your Own Good http://bit.ly/2nRioQ5

If You Feel Like Getting Married, DONT! http://bit.ly/2nlRoqv

Knowledge And It's Relevance To Marriage http://bit.ly/2n0wnOI

Keep That Engagement To Yourself http://bit.ly/2mAIkz9

Abigail, The Woman Of Every Man's Dream PT. 1. http://bit.ly/2nfXXJC

Abigail, The Woman Of Every Man's Dream PT. 2. http://bit.ly/2ng1GGX

Some Common Mistakes Singles Make PT. 1: http://bit.ly/2o12QpB

Some Common Mistakes Singles Make PT. 2: http://bit.ly/2n8QTMX

Some Common Mistakes Singles Make PT. 3: http://bit.ly/2nmLi7v

Some Common Mistakes Singles Make PT. 4: http://bit.ly/2ooP9QE

Some Common Mistakes Singles Make PT. 5: http://bit.ly/2mI4EH2

Some Common Mistakes Singles Make PT. 6:
http://bit.ly/2n9LMNs

Simplicity Wins The Crown: The Case Study Of Hadassah http://bit.ly/2n0Goew

Want To Be Successful In Marriage? DON'T HIDE IT FROM THEM http://bit.ly/2nLSKJf