14/09/2024
I AM MARRIED BUT I STILL THINK ABOUT MY EX
SHE: I have a secret problem
COUNSELLOR: What is it?
SHE: I often think of my ex
COUNSELLOR: Your husband knows this?
SHE: No. I am scared of telling him. You know how men are egotistical. Him having the knowledge that I think of another man will make him flip and insecure. He will think I am not yet over my ex
COUNSELLOR: Are you over your ex?
SHE: Yes I am. I can never go back. I have a good husband. But I can't help thinking about my ex
COUNSELLOR: When you think about your ex, are the thoughts largely s*xual and intimate?
SHE: Absolutely. I think of him largely during s*x. Don't get me wrong, my husband is so good in bed, but at times my mind wanders and I think about my ex. How he used to massage me, lick me, pounce on me. I recall our moments on the carpet talking till late. I recall his random phone calls. I recall how he used to s***k me. Sometimes I day dream and smile about him even though he really hurt me. He cheated on me and that is why I broke up with him
COUNSELLOR: I see
SHE: Is it that I don't love my husband fully? There are times I have masturbated to thoughts of my ex
COUNSELLOR: Soul ties
SHE: What?
COUNSELLOR: Soul ties. You are battling soul ties between you and your ex
SHE: What do you mean?
COUNSELLOR: Ever wondered why it is difficult to forget someone you had s*x with? Break ups hurt the most when two people have engaged in s*x. That is why a woman can keep running back to a man who uses her and beats her up because they have s*x, a man can keep a wrong and toxic relationship going because of s*x, that's why people get blinded by affairs that they can't see their marriage falling apart, that is why an old flame you had s*x with can show up right now and you two connect instantly like the years apart didn't change the connection
SHE: Soul ties!
COUNSELLOR: Yes. S*x first starts in the mind, then comes the emotional connection which leads to the excitement of a physical connection, if you act on the physical connection it leads to the deepest connection of the souls. Whether that connection is wrong or right, it is strong
SHE: S*x is that powerful?
COUNSELLOR: Yes. So powerful and yet people play around with it. There are people who struggle to enjoy the purity of s*x because they are battling many soul ties with different people they slept with in the past. S*x makes your soul feel entitled to the soul of the person you are s*xing, that is why infidelity in marriage is painful and hard to accept. You not only feel entitled but you are rightfully entitled to your spouse's body and it breaks you to know that soul you are entitled to is given to another
SHE: This is deep
COUNSELLOR: S*x is never about the size of the p***s, the tightness of the va**na, the wetness or the duration of the act; that is a shallow way of looking at it. S*x is about a soul connection. Soul ties can be good when the one you are tied to is the one you are with and will be with for life. So people need to be careful who they tie themselves to. Some people struggle to sleep, they have nightmares, they are angry for no reason because of a soul tie to the wrong one. S*x with the wrong one can lead to confusion
SHE: So I am stuck with this past tie?
COUNSELLOR: Nope. You can cut the tie
SHE: How?
COUNSELLOR: Clean up your soul, clean up your spirit
SHE: How?
COUNSELLOR: When God is about to do something new, He speaks. So you who are created in the image of God, speak into the spiritual realm. Declare "I cut off this soul tie with my ex. From now on, I will not be connected with my past"
SHE: I will do that
COUNSELLOR: Saturate your life with the Holy Spirit. Fill your life with the Holy Spirit no matter your s*xual past and you will be cleansed. The Holy Spirit and wrong soul ties cannot exist at the same time. Listen more to worship music. Read the word more. Watch the company you keep. Starve your flesh. Pray more, have a session of worship before you sleep as often as possible
SHE: Noted. That I will do too
COUNSELLOR: And finally, build a deeper connection with your husband. Go out on dates. Have emotional and intellectual intimacy. That means taking time to have stimulating conversations. Worship God together. Pray before sleeping. Make love more and make it creative and exciting. Tell your husband how you want to be s*xed. Be hungry for him, need him. Be naughty together. Flirt as a couple, let loose and make new experiences
SHE: Thank you counsellor. I knew I could count on you.
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