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Imperfect I'mperfect

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Imperfect I'mperfect

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28/02/2026

Self-care isn’t a luxury. It’s nervous system work. 🤍

When we don’t rest, we live in fight or flight mode.
That’s survival mode. It’s where we react, push through, stay alert. Useful in danger — but exhausting when it becomes our baseline.

In fight or flight, the body focuses on getting through.
Not on healing. Not on growing. Not on creating change.

Growth, healing, and real transformation happen in rest and digest mode.
That’s when the nervous system feels safe. That’s when creativity returns. That’s when you can actually reflect instead of just cope.

Especially in times of stress:
Slow down.
Treat yourself with attention.
Choose softness over self-criticism.

For me, one small ritual that brings me back to myself is buying fresh flowers at the Saturday market. 🌸
It’s simple. It’s intentional. It tells my system: you are safe enough to enjoy this.

Good things tend to come to happy, regulated people — not because life is perfect, but because from a grounded place, we see more, choose better, and connect deeper.

What’s your small ritual that brings you back to rest?

10/02/2026

I didn’t move to Mallorca for more.
I moved for less.

Less stress.
Less speed.
Less caring about expectations.

I needed to heal.
To come back to myself.
And build from there.

Three years on, I have more:
Time. Light. Meaning. Truth.

I feel grounded. Grateful. Alive.
Mental health first — every day.

Living in light.
Living in love.

How do you want to Upgrade your life?

31/01/2026

I firmly believe that everyone can upgrade their lives.

Not by chasing success first.
Not by forcing positivity.
And not by pretending the past didn’t happen.

Real change starts when you’re willing to face what shaped you.
When you stop letting old wounds quietly make your decisions.
When you question the stories you’ve been living by—and choose new ones that actually fit who you are now.

From that place, clarity grows.
You begin to trust your desires instead of doubting them.
You move differently. You choose differently.

And when your inner world shifts, the outer one responds.
Fulfilment comes first.
The rest—achievement, abundance, connection—has a way of following.

Upgrading your life isn’t about becoming someone else.
It’s about finally living as the person you already are.

23/01/2026

Happier people don’t objectively have more good things happening to them than people who report themselves as less happy.

So how come they are happier? That’s simple: they have developed the skill to interpret things in a positive way. They are optimistic.

Optimists have a better eye for the good stuff, and know that the bad stuff is temporary, restricted to a certain area in life and they tend to not take things personally.

Instead of spending your energy on changing your circumstances, try to look for the good in whatever is already here. And be grateful for what you have.

Because, you know: you do not become happy when you attain the things you want.
You reach the things you want because you are happy.

High energy attracts high energy. 💫

25/12/2025

As this year comes to a close, I want to wish you all a very Merry Christmas and a peaceful New Year.

May these days offer moments of rest, connection, and gentleness. Our mental wellbeing is deeply nourished by closeness — by feeling seen, heard, and supported by the people we love. Even small moments of genuine connection can make a real difference.

I hope you find time to slow down, to be kind to yourself, and to care for what truly matters. And if these days are difficult or mixed, know that that, too, is human.

Wishing you health, warmth, and meaningful connections in the year ahead. ♥️

14/12/2025

It’s with great pride that we at welcome our latest addition to the family in guiding you towards your optimal life. Today we launch our Living a life in Balance app, helping you on a daily basis to prioritise your mental and physical well being. Please check it out so find wonderful meditations, yoga practices, mental health exercises and daily check-ins. It’s available for free at the App Store or Google Play Store. With wonderful colleagues like and

13/11/2025

What did you notice in this post?

Was is the message? The colour, the font? Or was it the typo right at the bottom?

Because that was there on purpose. To demonstrate how quickly our mind goes to the things that are off. The things are not as desired.

Our brain tends to focus on danger, and so we go to the future and fantasise about possible negative things that could occur.

Or it goes to the past, te relive painful experiences so that you will never have to have them again.

In both cases you’re suffering. In both cases you’re out of alignment with joy. In both cases you activate your Fight & Flight system for things that aren’t even there. At least not now. And may never ever happen.

By focusing on joy, you calm your nervous system down. That is where growth happens. That is where healing happens. That is where connection happens.

So do the counterintuitive thing: choose joy. Choose to notice what’s good. Even when not everything is great.

06/11/2025

Trauma is having to go through an intense emotional experience, An experience where your (physical) integrity is at risk.

Trauma can be big, a huge event that you can label as such. But it can also be smaller and repeated. Neglect, not been seen or heard.

What I usually see in my practice, is that trauma is always about feeling alone. No matter if it was a one-time event, a certain period of time or was happening throughout a longer period.

The younger you were when the trauma(s) occurred, the more likely your emotional development stagnated at that time. That is what we call “arrested development”. When entering similar situations, you are likely to react from that emotional age.

The good thing about trauma, is that it can be healed. By revisiting the trauma, accompanied by a certified therapist, we can rewrite the experience. You can normalise the emotions and relabel the thoughts you have formed about yourself, other people and the world around you.

In a visualisation, we virtually experience the things that happened to you, but this time in the presence of someone who stands up for you, supports you and sees you. And this is the beginning of your healing journey, so that the trauma doesn’t cast its shadow forward to the here and now.

16/07/2025

Therapy is not for you.

Because you are strong. Because you are doing okay-ish. And because other people’s problems are bigger than yours. And most of all: you are not crazy or damaged.

So you have decided to keep going. To be brave, cry when no one is watching. Or just escape in pleasure, work, relationships or substances so as not to feel what is missing.

And that is going really well. You think.

Because somewhere inside, you know that you are not being totally honest to yourself. Deep down, you know you are repeating what you were missing in your childhood: by not listening to yourself you are still not being seen fully. You are not being acknowledged and you continue to let that little child in you strive on their own.

And the pressure of outside success becomes bigger and bigger, to compensate for the loneliness and sense of unworthiness that you are feeling inside.

Because you are afraid of that will happen if you stop. That everything will fall apart. That you will never be able to stop crying. Or that you have no idea of what it is that you actually want. So it’s easier to keep going. Running from this fear of not being good enough. Not being loveable.

Starting therapy takes courage. Both for the patient and for the therapist. Because first there is the breaking down the walls, being vulnerable enough and trusting enough to let somebody in. Because you have been let down and disappointed so many times.

But when you do, that’s where the real magic begins: that’s when I get to perform my miracle surgery of mending the pieces of your broken heart. Because it is BS that time will heal all wounds. It won’t. You just learn to deal with it better.

Truly repairing the wounds, and even Upgrading the operating systems. Replacing the software that was put in there when you were a child and putting in cutting edge techniques will give you the best second half of your life.

When will you start?

14/07/2025

Have you ever heard of High Functioning Depression? It sounds a bit weird, right?

Because, the classic idea of depression is to not be able to work, not get out of bed, and maybe even being suicidal. Not finding joy in anything you do. And yes, that is a very serious disease that needs serious treatment.

But what if it stays hidden between busy schedules and staying busy? We see more and more people in my practice who are just not happy enough. Who feel tired when they wake up, feel continuously irritated or guilty. Who are still delivering but don’t enjoy it anymore. Who operate on willpower.

They just stop being excited about things.

Stress is the biggest enemy in the process. Espcecially chronic stress.

The good news? It’s fairly easy to beat. By yourself. By doing some lifestyle interventions.

I can take you through these in my practice. Or give a lecture about it for your team or company. In case you decide to once and for all do things differently after you return from your summer break. Or when you don’t recharge enough or at all during your summer break.

Contact or of .academy ® to book me for your next event.

24/06/2025

This is me. Two years ago. On the 23rd of June, the night of San Juan. The tradition (which is originally Catalan) at San Juan is to go to the beach and celebrate the light with a group of friends and share a picnic and light. At midnight, you dip into the water, after having proclaimed what you are leaving behind and what you are stepping into in the new year.
At that time, two years ago, I felt miserable and lonely. I saw all these people on the beach, with their families or groups of friends, surrounded by light. And I walked down the boulevard feeling lonely, insignificant, unseen and really sad.
But also determined to change that situation. There and then, I adopted the mantra “I haven’t yet met all the people that I’m going to love”. It helped me through some tough times.
And now fast forward to yesterday. San Juan again. I found myself sitting on that same beach, feeling so blessed, rich and fortunate. Now I was one of those people sitting in a group, sharing food, wine and laughter.
When I look at the pictures that were taken last night, I see that the sad and hollow look in my eyes is gone. The smile on my face has been replaced by a heartfelt one and I feel so happy, grounded, calm, blessed, and grateful.
Little did I know at that time, that my mantra was so true. I did find new people. I am very blessed with a lot of lovely people in my life. I have loved a lot and I have been loved.
Over the past year, most of them stayed. Some left. But also, a whole new group entered. I met new people that I was going to love. In fact, all the people I was with yesterday, I didn’t know two years ago.
So, what I’m trying to say is: if you are out there, feeling lonely and sad: trust that there will be new, good things on the way. Trust that you will love and be loved again. Maybe not in the way you expect, and not by the people you expect.

Prioritise being happy. Prioritise doing nice things. Prioritise treating yourself like the Love of your Life. Then you will attract likeminded people and other circumstances. Of that, I am convinced. ♥️

21/06/2025

Six years ago today I published my book. What a milestone. It’s on many a bucketlist. And was it cool? Yes. Did I feel proud? Yes. Did it make me feel happier? I’m not sure.

I believe there are two things being happy WITH your life. And being happy IN your life.

The first one is about achieving the big things you want. The job. The love. The life goals.

Being happy IN your life is about the daily thing. It is about making sure you do the little things that give you fulfilment.

Sure, the Big things make sure you feel proud. And the small things make you feel happy. Together they make you feel grateful.

So today, I feel happy and grateful for this big milestone and the small things in day to day life. The sunsets, the connections, the good quality.

♥️

Adres

Sint Jorisstraat 5a
'S-Hertogenbosch
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Het beeld dat je van jezelf hebt, bepaalt hoe je je gedraagt. En hoe je je gedraagt, bepaalt vervolgens weer je resultaten. En die resultaten dragen weer bij aan hoe je over jezelf denkt. Andere resultaten krijgen, begint dus bij een ander beeld van jezelf.