Empatherapy

Psychology practice

01/08/2025

💬 question: is it easier to see what's missing for you, even in those cases where you recognize it's not much, or you can see both rationally and emotionally the satisfactory amount you've already got?

it's not always the case that we got a lot, but these past years i've really realized how subjective our perception of this is, and how influenced it is by our feelings. when we feel life owes us a lot, even in cases in which it gives us more than we expected, we simply don't notice it. it does nothing to replenish our sense of deprivation.

in the next blog post we'll discuss this further ✍️

30/07/2025

let's be clear: we can't escape being inside it. but there are many ways to inhabit our heads, and sometimes we engage in the act of head-rotting a lot and detach from everything outside of our skin.

we'll elaborate on this concept soon, but first let this question mean whatever it means to you.

🐇 how deep does your rabbit hole go?

28/07/2025

do i get to making a choice by forcing myself, or postponing so much i then slip into one alternative instead than really choosing it, and then get remorseful about what i lost?

26/07/2025

save a spot on www.empatherapy.nl/events

21/07/2025

this past weekend i gave a workshop called "get unstuck", using yoga and the body in general to guide through hard decisions

• do i leave or do i stay?

• do i choose comfort or adventure?

• do i pick this or that job?

• do i try something new or stick with what i know?

• do i keep chasing the reward or work on my tolerance for boredom?

• do i keep my bad habits or work towards changing them?

☯️ A or B? Yes or no? this or that? in or out? black or white?

it was very interesting to notice patterns in how we get stuck and themes of choices, often between protection and exploration, but also so much more

📆 stay tuned for information on the workshop, and in the meantime ask yourself how you handle choices. is it an opportunity, or abandoning an alternative freezes you?

07/07/2025

👥 when it comes to social connection, we are used to see independence as a necessary condition for it. how many times have you heard: "only when you're happy by yourself, you can be with someone else". and who am i to tell you that's a lie?

truth is, there's truth to that.

✋they're not lying to you when they tell you it's going to be messy to open up your life to others if you don't respect yourself, if your pain made you manipulative and defensive, if you're unaware of your boundaries and needs, if you can't be alone and don't like yourself. it will be messy, yes. you might need therapy, support, help, growth. you'll have to work to heal.

🫀 they are not lying to you when they tell you you can deeplyhurt others – and yourself – if you're not careful and mindful. you will, they will, people are messy and life is.

☝🏼but think about this. what heals in therapy? the relationship. not the approach, not the techniques, not the online/offline setting, not the gender of your psychologist. what heals is how whatever happens between you and th

03/07/2025

💬 when you meet someone, what is the first thing you notice?

👁️is it something physical, something you were criticized for perhaps, or somethinh you always wanted? or something you have, and you like in your own body?

🧢 is it a hat, a shirt, a colour they're wearing? the way it matches their skin, the way it complements their outfit? the money they spent or didn't spend on it?

🌝 is it a glimpse of character? something in their eyes, in their tone, in the way they use their hands, they comb their hair, they approach someone else?

🔥 is it something you feel when you look at them and you have no name for?

23/06/2025

changing the subject of this week but not so much

when tutoring students at the university on their clinical internship, one of them reported his client's need to have friends. so i asked him: "why does he want friends?", to which he responded he didn't ask. so i asked him, and all of them: "why do you want friends?"

❓it seems like a silly question, an obvious one. we need companionship because... we need it. and that is certainly true, belonging and closeness are things that bring us life and meaning, and can destroy it when we are starved of them.

but, we are a species of words. for each one of use this need has a different form, a slightly unique story. we want people in our life, or we don't want them, because of all sorts of reason.

💬 what is it that you, explicitly or implicitly, want from others who enter your life? what do you look for when they haven't yet and you'd like them to?

16/06/2025

ChatGPT was released in 2022 and grew an userbase quicker than facebook and instagram, gaining 100 million users in just two months and with 400 million weekly users at this moment.

Its growth is skyrocketing and its ability to learn exponential.

🤔 people don't only ask it suggestions for podcasts, summaries of documents, and career advice, they ask to explain complex science concepts, to plan a trip, to answer questions about itself and them.

🗣️ moreover, they ask it to be a friend, sometimes a coach or a therapist. and chatGPT validates those questions, expresses how bad that must feel, normalizes those feelings, stating there's nothing wrong with that, it's just human to need things, then it asks examples so it can get more specific, and keeps reassuring you of how little you asked and how much you'd give if the situation was reversed (how does it know that?). at some point, it suggests to talk about it with it (her, him, them? it got so close at this point that it's hard to remind yourself it's not human).

💬 all good, right? the person got the comfort they needed. or not? what's missing?

(in the stories some examples)

13/06/2025

🤔 the question is not what AI can do - that's beyond the scope of this page - nor what kind of hopes and needs you put in its hands when you ask it something.

☝🏼 the question is: what makes you go "whoa" the most when it responds to your inquiries? when does its contribution really make a difference for you?
what answers would have taken you the longest to find yourself? what advice would you have likely not received from others than it? what resources does it have that you - or the people and tools around you - don't?

💬 take a minute to leave the question open, maybe something emerges by the end of the day.

💭 or maybe, you'll just keep thinking

Adres

Leiden
2324GS

Website

http://www.empatherapy.nl/

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