Recipes4Change

27/10/2025

𝗟𝗲𝘁’𝘀 𝗧𝗮𝗹𝗸 𝗔𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗔𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗿

My father was prone to raging episodes, and in between those moments he could be loving and nurturing. That was the example of anger I grew up with — ugly, scary, and deeply distressing. I didn’t like it.

The culture I grew up in reinforced the idea that expressing anger, especially for women, was not acceptable. Sadness, on the other hand, was encouraged. So, I learned to suppress and contain my anger, and in situations where anger would have been appropriate, I would instead burst into tears. Sadness became the emotion I expressed whenever anger threatened to surface.

However, I also noticed that once in a while I experienced rage episodes myself — just like my father. I saw the same pattern in my siblings. Afterwards, I would feel ashamed and guilty for losing my calm. It was surprising and painful to realise how often children unconsciously repeat what their parents have not healed.

As an adult, I observed in some of my relationships that for some people, anger — much like my father’s — came too easily. It was the go-to emotion, especially when sadness or vulnerability felt too threatening to express.

It was in therapy that I finally learned the value of expressing my anger, and how preventing it from seeing the light of day had led to many of my boundaries being broken, blurred, or ignored.

Through therapy and during my training to qualify as a counsellor, I learned that anger is a valid emotion, just like sadness, fear, and joy. Anger is not rage. Anger can be quiet. There is such a thing as 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘵𝘩𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳.

I also came to understand that those who are prone to raging might be using their anger as a cover for deep sadness and hurt they never felt able to express safely.

With time, I learned to hold compassion for myself, and for those close to me, who held on to anger to avoid feeling other painful emotions — while still recognising our shared responsibility to manage our emotions in healthy ways.

Time and time again, I observe in my work as a coach and counsellor how often my clients struggle to express their emotions — especially when it comes to anger.

Anger is one of the most misunderstood emotions. Yet, it is also one of the most vital.

✨Anger motivates us and helps us find direction in life.
✨Anger signals injustice, safeguards our values, and supports our healing from past wrongs.
✨Anger protects us, helps us set boundaries, and clarifies what truly matters to us.

When we acknowledge our anger, we reclaim our power, our self-respect, and our voice.

💭Do you struggle to express your anger?
💭Do you find yourself feeling sadness or fear instead, even when anger would be appropriate?
💭Or do you hold on to anger and use it to shield yourself from vulnerability?

Let’s talk.

24/10/2025

Over the years, I’ve relocated several times — including two major moves to the Netherlands, first in 1993 and then in 2001. At the time, there were hardly any relocation support companies like Rossella - Going Expat to guide individuals and families through the logistical, emotional and cultural adjustment that comes with such a big move.

Looking back, I realise how unprepared I was — not just practically, but emotionally and mentally.

In my recent conversation with Rossella (link below), we reflect on those early days.

Relocation to a new country can be both exciting and daunting. It challenges our sense of belonging, connection, and identity. It also offers growth, resilience, and a new perspective. That was my own experience, and what I observe through my coaching and counselling work with international clients.

Thank you Julie Taylor for connecting Rossella and I, and to Rossella for holding this space to share our stories.

Watch our conversation here: https://youtu.be/OjXRmHCOT_k

Have you experienced an international move — to the Netherlands or elsewhere?�I'd love to hear:
* What helped you through it?
* What do you wish you’d known?
* How did it shape who you are today?

Here how you can contact Rawia:LinkedIn account https://www.linkedin.com/in/rawia-liverpool/Website https://www.recipes4change.com/Needs support to move to t...

21/10/2025

“𝙎𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙞𝙨 𝙬𝙧𝙤𝙣𝙜 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙢𝙚.”

It’s a phrase I often hear from clients as they try to make sense of their emotional struggles and life challenges.

It’s also something I once believed about myself.

As a child, teenager, and young adult, I internalised the idea that something was 𝘧𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘢𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘸𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘨 with me:
�😑 For feeling sad or anxious�😑 For struggling with low self-esteem�😑 For feeling like I didn’t belong�😑 For believing I wasn’t good enough

In time—and through my own journey in coaching, counselling, and therapy—I realised:�𝙏𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙬𝙖𝙨 𝙣𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙖𝙣𝙮𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙬𝙧𝙤𝙣𝙜 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙢𝙚.
There was something wrong with the environment around me.

What I thought were flaws were actually coping mechanisms—survival strategies I developed to protect myself in difficult circumstances. They helped me then, but later on became patterns that no longer served me.
That awareness changed everything.

🌱 I learned that I wasn’t broken—I was adapting.�🌱 I discovered I had choices in how I respond to life.�🌱 I found my voice, reclaimed my confidence, and began to live more freely and intentionally.

That transformation is what inspired me to become a coach and counsellor. Since founding 𝗥𝗲𝗰𝗶𝗽𝗲𝘀𝟰𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲 in 2012, I’ve been working with individuals to support them to understand
their patterns, and their behaviours, which are understandable responses to emotional pain. That they can learn to trust themselves, think for themselves, make their own decisions, express their feelings safely and confidently, and create meaningful, lasting change.

𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗱𝗼𝗻’𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝘁𝗮𝘆 𝘀𝘁𝘂𝗰𝗸 𝗶𝗻 𝗼𝗹𝗱, 𝘂𝗻𝗵𝗲𝗹𝗽𝗳𝘂𝗹 𝗽𝗮𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗻𝘀.
�With support and guidance, you can release outdated strategies from childhood, and develop new ones that truly serve who you are today.

𝘋𝘰𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘺𝘰𝘶?�Let’s talk.

20/10/2025

Last week, I had the privilege of hosting the final Dream Workshop led by Cammi Manchur.

It was a bittersweet moment — the closing of a beautiful journey shared with others who, like me, are drawn to the deeper layers of inner work.

As a coach and counsellor, I often sit with people’s stories, fears, longings, and hopes. What made this experience unique was how dreams became the doorway into our unconscious worlds — spaces we often overlook, yet which hold profound insight.

Together, we welcomed each other’s dreams without judgment or pretence. Dreams are raw, emotional, and deeply personal. Sharing them in this intimate group setting felt safe, sacred, and transformative — not unlike the space I strive to create for my clients every day.

Heraclitus once said:

“𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥 𝘪𝘯 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘮𝘰𝘯; 𝘴𝘭𝘦𝘦𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘢 𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘷𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘰𝘸𝘯.”

And through this workshop, we courageously opened those private worlds to one another.

Saying goodbye was tinged with sadness, yet I’m left with deep gratitude. It was a privilege to witness the vulnerability, symbolism, and meaning that surfaced in each session.

Thank you, Cammi, for holding space for our dreams with such skill and care, and for sharing your Jungian lens on dreamwork — a perspective that resonated deeply with me as both a practitioner and participant.

We closed the final session by drawing cards from a deck Cammi brought — each offering a message to carry forward. The one I received (pictured below) spoke directly to where I am, and where I hope to continue journeying with those I support.

May the dream fairy bring you the most meaningful and insightful dreams.

And may we all keep listening to what stirs beneath the surface.

17/10/2025

“𝘞𝘩𝘰 𝘢𝘮 𝘐? 𝘞𝘩𝘰 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶? 𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵?”

I asked my mother this when I was 14.

At the time, I was struggling, feeling deeply discouraged about life, and uncertain whether it could ever feel joyful or meaningful.

She shrugged and said,
“𝘓𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘪𝘵.”

It wasn’t the answer I was hoping for—and at that age, I couldn’t fully grasp what she meant.

But over the years, and especially through my work as a 𝗰𝗼𝗮𝗰𝗵 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗼𝗿, I’ve come to understand how true—and how powerful—those six words really are.

Many of the people I support come to me wrestling with these same big questions.

They’re searching for clarity, confidence, and connection—trying to make sense of life’s deeper purpose, and what 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 to make of it.

I recently had the opportunity to reflect on my own journey, and the evolution of my work, in conversation with Shiela Krabbenborg on her new podcast 𝗚𝗿𝗼𝘄𝘁𝗵 𝗨𝗻𝗰𝗲𝗻𝘀𝗼𝗿𝗲—where I was honoured to be her very first guest.

We met when she attended my Buzz Business Networking talk, 𝘍𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘗𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘗𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘳, and stayed in touch. The conversation we had on her podcast felt just as real, thoughtful and grounded.

We spoke about meaning, identity, mental health, personal transformation, and what I’ve learned from the people I’ve worked with over the years.

If you're curious to listen or watch, the links are below.

I’d love to hear your thoughts if you tune in.

Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/episode/0XaMfQWbVO5yef6hwENtQX?si=NKLGkHPOTI65tbq8-VGM9g

Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/nl/podcast/growth-uncensored-beyond-the-business-blueprint/id1842300705?l=en-GB&i=1000731953228

YouTube: https://youtu.be/TkF81V-slNc

What happens when you’ve built a life that looks secure — but doesn’t feel like your own?In this episode of Growth Uncensored, Rawia Liverpool joins me to sh...

16/10/2025

🤔𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘥𝘰 𝘐 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘺 𝘪𝘯 𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘱𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘩𝘶𝘳𝘵 𝘮𝘦?
🤔𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘢𝘮 𝘐 𝘪𝘯 𝘢 𝘫𝘰𝘣 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘥𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘴 𝘮𝘦?
🤔𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘥𝘰 𝘐 𝘴𝘢𝘺 𝘺𝘦𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘢𝘺 𝘯𝘰?
🤔𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘥𝘰 𝘐 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘰𝘯𝘦, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘨𝘨𝘭𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘢𝘤𝘤𝘦𝘱𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧?
🤔𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘥𝘰 𝘐 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘢𝘯𝘹𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴, 𝘶𝘯𝘮𝘰𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘥, 𝘰𝘳 𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘦?

These are the kinds of questions many of my clients explore in our sessions. Often, they trace back to old stories — patterns shaped in childhood, repeated unconsciously in adulthood.

A story that once helped them survive, but may now be holding them back.

My name is Rawia, which in Arabic means 𝘧𝘦𝘮𝘢𝘭𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘳. And as a coach and counsellor supporting people through life transitions, I find myself constantly sitting with stories — listening, reflecting, and supporting others to look at those stories with fresh eyes in order to rewrite the ones that no longer serve them.

Together, we explore:
🔸Where did this story come from?🔸Is it still true?
🔸Does it reflect who you are today?🔸Is it helping you — or keeping you stuck?

We can’t change the past, but we 𝘤𝘢𝘯 change the story we tell ourselves about it, and make conscious choices in the present that reshape the future.

After all, no one expects their phone or laptop to run well on outdated software.

So why expect that we can continue to function well on outdated strategies?

𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘧𝘪𝘹𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘮𝘢𝘺𝘣𝘦 𝘪𝘵’𝘴 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘢𝘯 𝘶𝘱𝘥𝘢𝘵𝘦.

If you're going through a transition, feeling stuck, or simply ready to understand yourself on a deeper level — let’s talk.

13/10/2025

On my daily walk through the park, I pass a playground that now stands empty. In the stillness of autumn, it’s hard to imagine the life it held just months ago, full of children, noise, movement. I brought my grandson there several times over the summer.

I remember that as I stood watching him play, I was struck by a wave of nostalgia: this is the same playground where I used to bring his mum and her sister, back when we first moved to The Hague 25 years ago.

Though the structure has changed — a few new elements, others gone — the essence remains. And so do the memories.
It made me reflect on the passage of time, and how we carry memories forward, layering them through generations. It feels like a witness to how far we all have come.

If playgrounds could speak, I wonder what stories they would tell.

I imagine they would tell stories of growth, resilience, connection — the same themes I encounter in my work as a coach and counsellor.

Just like that playground, we each hold layers of experience: joys, challenges, transitions.

As I support others through personal and professional transitions, I’m reminded again and again that while circumstances change, what truly matters often stays the same: connection, meaning, presence.

The playground stands empty, yet it is full of memories and reminders.

What memories or places remind 𝘺𝘰𝘶 of how far you’ve come?

09/10/2025

"𝙔𝙤𝙪 𝙙𝙤𝙣’𝙩 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙘𝙝𝙤𝙤𝙨𝙚 𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙨𝙞𝙙𝙚 𝙤𝙛 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛 𝙩𝙤 𝙗𝙚𝙡𝙤𝙣𝙜."

As someone of mixed heritage, I am familiar with the challenges that come with navigating identity, belonging, and self-worth. Growing up between cultures, I often felt like I was not “enough” of anything — not this, not that — and struggled to find where I truly fit. It took time, deep reflection, and inner work to reclaim all parts of myself and finally feel at home within.

This journey inspired my work as a 𝗰𝗼𝗮𝗰𝗵 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗼𝗿. Coincidentally, I find myself now often supporting young adults — especially those from mixed or multicultural backgrounds — who are facing similar questions about identity, purpose, and self-esteem.

Many of my clients feel like they’re constantly shifting to meet others’ expectations or suppressing parts of themselves to belong.

Through compassionate guidance and identity-affirming coaching, I support them to come back to themselves. Together, we explore the roots of self-doubt, heal the wounds of not-𝘦𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴, and build a solid sense of self — one that embraces their full, authentic identity.

This work isn’t just about confidence. It’s about liberation.�It's about feeling safe in who you are, owning your story, and stepping into your life with clarity, purpose, and self-trust.

If this resonates, I invite you to reach out. Let's begin your journey back to yourself.

06/10/2025

"𝘍𝘰𝘳 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘪𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘶𝘭𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘵, 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘱𝘺 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘯 𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘥𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘢𝘤𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘪𝘤𝘦."
— Unknown

As a coach and counsellor, I have observed how unhealed wounds can quietly shape our lives—often without our awareness. They show up in our relationships, choices, and patterns. And more often than not, they spill over onto the people we love most.

We don’t always realise how much our unresolved pain influences our behaviour—until we begin the work of healing.

Someone once said, "𝘞𝘦 𝘨𝘰 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘱𝘺 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘴 𝘥𝘪𝘥𝘯’𝘵—𝘰𝘳 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥𝘯’𝘵." That resonates deeply with me. For many of us, healing is not just personal—it’s intergenerational. Therapy has been one of the greatest gifts I’ve given to myself, and by extension, to my children and grandchildren.

When we invest in our emotional and mental well-being, we open the door to more aligned decisions, deeper relationships, and a greater sense of peace. And when done with the right practitioner, this work can be truly transformative.

If you're feeling the call to heal, to grow, or simply to understand yourself better—know that it's not self-indulgent. It's an act of courage, and an act of service to those around you.

✨ If you’re ready to begin that journey, or if you're curious about how coaching or counselling could support you, feel free to reach out.

To learn more visit www.recipes4change.com

02/10/2025

As I sat in the airport, waiting to board my flight after a deeply nourishing time with my grandson, daughter, and her partner, I find myself experiencing a familiar emotional blend, one I’ve come to know intimately, both personally and professionally.

There is 𝘴𝘢𝘥𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴 in saying goodbye. Over the past weeks, I’ve shared in the joys and routines of family life, supported my loved ones, and been fully present in their world.

And yet, alongside that sadness, there is also 𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘪𝘱𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯. I’m looking forward to returning to my own space, to my community, my work, and the solitude that sustains me.

Two seemingly contradictory emotions, held at once.

This moment reminds me of something Brené Brown wrote, drawing on Susan Cain’s work — that 𝘣𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘵𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴 is a kind of piercing joy that acknowledges life’s dualities: light and dark, joy and sorrow, arrival and departure. It’s not about choosing one over the other, but learning to hold both — fully, honestly, and with compassion.

As someone who has led an international life for many years, and as a coach and counsellor working with globally mobile clients, I know this feeling is not unique. Whether we’re saying goodbye to loved ones, adapting to a new culture, or witnessing our children thrive far from home, we often carry this bittersweetness quietly.

It’s there when a child leaves for university in another country. When we move toward a new opportunity, even as we leave something meaningful behind. When life changes — sometimes beautifully — and we realise it won’t return to how it was.

In my work, I’ve seen how powerful it can be to 𝘯𝘢𝘮𝘦 and 𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘴𝘱𝘢𝘤𝘦 for these complex emotions. Too often, we’re encouraged to downplay the sadness and only celebrate the positive. But genuine growth, resilience, and connection often come when we allow 𝘣𝘰𝘵𝘩 experiences to coexist.

This is at the heart of the work I do with clients — supporting them to navigate transitions, make meaning from change, and live more fully in the 𝘣𝘰𝘵𝘩/𝘢𝘯𝘥 of life.

So today, I honour the joy I’ve shared with my family. I acknowledge the sadness of parting. And I welcome the grounding pull of returning home.

If you’ve lived or worked internationally — or supported others through transition — you may know this feeling well.

I’d love to hear how 𝘣𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘵𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴 shows up in your life and work.

29/09/2025

Dear Woman,

𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗽𝗮𝘀𝘁 𝘀𝗵𝗮𝗽𝗲𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂, 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝗶𝘁 𝗱𝗼𝗲𝘀𝗻’𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗱𝗲𝗳𝗶𝗻𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂.

I grew up in an environment that, directly and indirectly, told me I wasn’t good enough. That I didn’t matter. That my feelings, thoughts, and voice were irrelevant. As a young girl, I internalised those messages — born from discrimination, emotional neglect, and abandonment — and carried them into adulthood.

So, I treated myself the way I had been treated:
❌ Ignoring my needs
❌ Putting others first — always
❌ Accepting crumbs in relationships
❌ Staying too long in toxic workplaces
❌ Silencing my voice to keep the peace

But then came a moment — a breaking point — where I decided to stop abandoning 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧.

I did the deep work. I faced the pain. I challenged the beliefs I had unknowingly carried for years. And slowly, I started to choose 𝘮𝘦.

💗 Today, I love the woman I am.
💗 I see her. I listen to her. I care for her.
💗 I set boundaries. I protect my peace.
💗 I walk away when things cost me my emotional well-being.
💗 I choose self-care without guilt or apology.

This transformation isn’t just personal — it’s also 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘧𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭. As a Coach and Counsellor, I now hold space for others on similar journey.

Because so many women come to me carrying unhealed stories that have shaped their self-worth, relationships, careers, and choices.

Together, we uncover where those patterns began. We rewrite the inner narrative. We create a life rooted in self-trust, self-worth, and self-love.

To the woman reading this who sees herself in my story: You are not alone. You are not broken. And you absolutely can choose a different future.

If you’re ready to start that journey, I’d be honoured to walk alongside you.

To learn more visit www.recipes4change.com

25/09/2025

“𝘏𝘪 𝘙𝘢𝘸𝘪𝘢, 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘸𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘯, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘶𝘭𝘢𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘰𝘱𝘪𝘤 𝘰𝘧 𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘰𝘰𝘵 𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘸𝘩𝘺 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘵 𝘴𝘰 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘭𝘺.”

I was deeply humbled to receive this message from a former client, reflecting on how transformative it was to explore the topic of shame together. It was a brave and vulnerable conversation — one that helped them reclaim their sense of worth and agency.

As someone who has also done this work personally, I was grateful to hold space for them with empathy and compassion. It was a powerful reminder of why this work matters.

So, let’s talk about shame.

Shame is one of the most universal human emotions — and yet, it’s one of the least talked about.

Why?

Because, as Brené Brown says so clearly:
“𝙎𝙝𝙖𝙢𝙚 𝙞𝙨 𝙖 𝙛𝙤𝙘𝙪𝙨 𝙤𝙣 𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛; 𝙜𝙪𝙞𝙡𝙩 𝙞𝙨 𝙖 𝙛𝙤𝙘𝙪𝙨 𝙤𝙣 𝙗𝙚𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙞𝙤𝙪𝙧. 𝙎𝙝𝙖𝙢𝙚 𝙨𝙖𝙮𝙨 ‘𝙄 𝙖𝙢 𝙗𝙖𝙙.’ 𝙂𝙪𝙞𝙡𝙩 𝙨𝙖𝙮𝙨 ‘𝙄 𝙙𝙞𝙙 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙗𝙖𝙙.’”
That distinction matters!

When we experience shame, we often internalise the belief that 𝘸𝘦
are the problem — not our actions, not our circumstances —𝘶𝘴. And when we believe that, it can feel like there’s no way forward. No possibility of change.

Shame convinces us we’re unworthy of love, connection, or growth.
It keeps us silent.
It us isolated.
It tells us we are alone — and that we deserve to be.

But we are not.

That’s something I’ve learnt both personally, through my own experience of shame, and professionally, as a coach and counsellor, witnessing the courage of clients who are brave enough to face it.

𝗦𝗵𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝗰𝗮𝗻𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝘀𝘂𝗿𝘃𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗲𝗺𝗽𝗮𝘁𝗵𝘆.
When we speak our shame in a safe, compassionate space, it begins to lose its power. When we’re met with understanding instead of judgement, healing becomes possible.

𝗠𝘆 𝗿𝗼𝗹𝗲 𝗮𝘀 𝗮 𝗰𝗼𝗮𝗰𝗵 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗼𝗿.
My approach isn’t about “fixing” people.

It’s about creating a space where people feel safe enough to be honest — even about the things they’ve never said out loud before.

We don’t outrun shame.
We don’t silence it with positivity.

We meet it.
Gently.
With curiosity.
With compassion.

And slowly, we start to remember that we are not the worst things we’ve done or the harshest stories we believe about ourselves.

We are human. We are learning. We are still allowed to grow.

𝗔 𝗴𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗶𝗻𝘃𝗶𝘁𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻
If shame is something you’ve been carrying, I want you to know that you don’t have to keep it in the dark.

Whether you're ready to explore it now, or just want to understand what support could look like, I’m here — to hold space for you in the same way it was once held for me.

Coaching and counselling can be a powerful way to begin that conversation — one step at a time.

Let’s bring shame into the light — with empathy, honesty, and care.