29/12/2025
This is probably one of the most *important* posts I've ever written.
●● Realizing I've been operating in a shutdown trauma response for several years, without even knowing it.
- and what helped me get out of it. ●●
◇🌱◇
I'll be quoting some facts from a recent article shared online by Soul Rise Journeys; "*Shutdown is a Survival Response*".
They talk about how shutdown is a nervous system state. And for many people, it is the most misunderstood one.
◇◇◇
"When the body perceives that fight is no longer safe and flight is no longer possible, it does something very old and very wise.
It conserves.
It slows.
It numbs.
It collapses inward.
More often, it is the drip drip drip of life asking too much for too long.
You keep going.
You keep coping.
You keep showing up.
Until one day, your body says no more. And instead of exploding, it goes quiet."
Shutdown does not always look dramatic.
It often looks like this:
• You feel exhausted no matter how much you sleep
• You struggle to start things, even things you care about
• Your emotions feel flat, distant, muted, or unreachable
• You feel disconnected from your body or from life itself
• You cancel plans, withdraw socially, or go silent
• You feel heavy, foggy, blank, or frozen
This is not a mindset problem. It is a physiology problem."
◇◇◇
It's very subtle and therefore can be hard to detect.
From the outside, it may look like someone who's unmotivated, lazy or depressed.
A shutdown response happens not because you are weak. But because your system is trying to keep you alive.
Shutdown often develops after prolonged stress, trauma, chronic overwhelm, emotional invalidation, or situations where you felt trapped with no way out. Not one big event necessarily.
For me, it was prolonged stress in life.
Of not feeling heard or safe to express my truth to others.
Emotional and physical abandonment.
Stress and trauma from pregnancy, post partum and life as a full-time single parent.
It was holding it all together, and then keep going. But I didn't know how much it was costing me on the inside.
◇◇◇
"Your system learns that activation is dangerous or futile.
So it chooses conservation instead.
Shutdown is the body saying:
“I cannot win, I cannot escape, so I will minimise.”
It is not giving up on life. It is protecting what little energy remains"
◇◇◇
Recently it became obvious to me that my nervous system was in survival mode.
It didn't show on the outside, or perhaps only by a select few.
I started procrastinating, far more than usual.
Even the smallest little task, such as paying a single bill, for instance, felt like a massive mountain to climb.
I felt hypervigilant. I jumped easily. I got scared easily. Had frequent startling nightmares. I struggled to breathe deeply.
I found difficulty in trusting others and their intentions.
I had an immense aversion towards making any kinds of decisions as they simply felt too overwhelming.
◇◇◇
"And often there is deep shame layered on top.
“I shouldn’t feel like this.”
“Other people cope.”
“Something is wrong with me.”
There isn’t.
Your body adapted to survive."
I tried forcing my motivation and inspiration to return by creating to-do lists after to-do lists, only to crumble them up after a day or two and start again.
I tried energywork, countless hours in nature, coaching, forcing myself to wake up earlier, breathwork, working on my emotions and belief systems.. Nothing worked and I felt numb.
I intuitively knew that the answers - and also salvation, somehow had to do with my nervous system.
In order to find my way out, I had to reintroduce safety back into my life.
And this I had to do on my own.
◇◇◇
"Healing shutdown is not about activation first. It is about safety first.
Very small, very gentle, very consistent signals that the body is allowed to exist without threat."
Although for me; being around certain people and environments did help and bring a certain level of comfort; I didn't wish to become reliant upon other people in order for me to feel safe.
Of course, that could just be me.
I don't necessarily recommend self isolation to others as a cure, however knowing me - I knew that this was the right thing for me to do.
Removing myself from most of all perceived sources of comfort.
Minimizing noise, demands and external stimulation.
I went to a cabin far up in the mountains during the Nortic winter and during the darkest time of the year.
I had massive fears going in.
Survival fears.
Being along, the cold, the icy roads, running out of food, running out of water and the list goes on.
There were three main beliefs I had to entrain myself into believing again, and who turned out to completely change my life:
"You are not alone"
"You are safe"
"You are loved".
I wanted to regain a sense of safety from within. In the company of my Soul and of God.
And it helped.
I ignored my to-do list. (hard at first).
I focused on comfort and rest.
I hugged pillows. Used hot water bottles. Had a fire going. Drank tees. Gave myself space to simply Be.
And whenever those fears resurfaced, I would repeat those mantras above;
"You are safe". "You are loved". "You are not alone".
I let go of all expectations of myself. Of expectations and attachments to life and of how I thought it should look like.
And slowly but surely...
As the days went by..
I felt a resurfacing wave of inspiration, motivation and LOVE in my heart.
I caught myself smiling, for no particular reason.
I began seeing proof in my own physical reality that I was indeed never alone
People started showing up around me
I felt love from all kinds of different sources
And I saw how I was utterly supported and protected at all times.
There was absolutely nothing to fear
My nervous system started softening and relaxing, bits by bits
As I know this is a work in progress, I now feel so very grateful for this experience and for the bravery of my own Soul and human self to remember that safety and peace is within, always.
And that's it's OK - and actually imperative to slow down and rest and to offer self compassion.
◇◇◇
"Shutdown is not the end.
It is a pause initiated by wisdom, not weakness.
Your body shut things down because it could not sustain what was being asked of it.
When you meet that response with compassion instead of control, the system slowly learns that it is safe to re emerge.
Not all at once.
Not dramatically.
But honestly.
You are not broken.
You are protecting life inside you.
And that deserves understanding, not judgment.
"
♡♡♡
Does this resonate with you or perhaps someone you know? ☆ Please share or reach out for support. Know that you are not alone and that there is indeed a way out.
♡♡♡ ̊dgiver
