The Healing Barn

22/12/2025

When everything feels louder, faster, and closer to the surface, a powerful question to return to is:

What do I need right now?

Not what’s expected of me.
Not what would keep the peace.
Not what I should be able to handle.

But what I need.

It might be:

More space than usual.

Fewer words and more quiet.

Simpler plans.

Clearer boundaries.

Extra sleep.

Reassurance.

Support.

Permission to feel without explaining.

The answer may change from moment to moment — and that’s okay.

This season isn’t asking you to push harder.
It’s asking you to listen more closely.

Let your needs be valid, even when they don’t match the season around you.

20/12/2025

Nice to see the scientific studies results coming through of this wonderful technique which is the main structure of my work.
Melissa 🥰

20/12/2025

When the volume of the season rises, we don’t need to rise with it.

We can meet it differently.

You might:

Take a few intentional pauses in the day, even if only for one breath.

Step outside and let your nervous system recalibrate to something slower and real.

Lower the bar on what “enough” looks like — meals, conversations, plans.

Give yourself permission to leave early, arrive late, or opt out completely.

Listen to your body’s cues before listening to expectations.

Coping doesn’t mean hardening yourself.
It means softening your relationship with what you’re feeling.

This season can be navigated through small acts of self-trust and self-kindness.
You don’t have to do it perfectly.
You just have to do it honestly.

Gentle is not weak — it’s wise.

19/12/2025

This season has a way of turning up the volume on everything.

Joy can feel brighter.
Grief can feel closer to the surface.
Family dynamics, old memories, expectations, exhaustion — all amplified.

If you’re noticing emotions rising more quickly, your body feeling more sensitive, or your nervous system sitting closer to the edge, there is nothing wrong with you.
This time of year simply shines a stronger light.

It asks more presence.
More gentleness.
More permission to meet yourself exactly where you are.

You don’t have to be cheerful.
You don’t have to be grateful on demand.
You don’t have to hold it all together.

Sometimes the most loving thing you can do this season is slow down, soften your expectations, and listen to what your body and heart are quietly asking for.

Let this be a season of compassion — especially toward yourself.
Not fixing.
Not forcing.
Just allowing.

You’re not alone in feeling this.

Melissa 🥰

11/12/2025

We’d just settled in at the airport café — nothing fancy, just a drink and something small to eat before boarding. I remember looking around and noticing how bright the lights were. How many people were moving in different directions. And then my body gave me that quiet signal it sometimes does, blurring around the outside of my vision … a soft pull inward, like, That’s enough now.
Not panic.
Not fear.
Just my system saying, “This is a lot.”
The moment we stepped outside to board the plane, everything lifted.
Fresh air.
Open space.
Sky above me.
My body softened immediately, like it finally had room to breathe again.
I honestly thought that was the end of it.
But as the plane began to accelerate down the runway, something happened so fast I barely had time to register it.
My stomach dropped — completely.
It felt like I’d left it behind on the tarmac.
And then the nausea hit like a wave rolling up from deep inside.
My hearing was fine — crystal clear, actually — but I had to close my eyes. There was this deep, instinctive knowing that if I kept them open, I would pass out. Not because I was scared… but because my body had hit its limit and was trying to manage the overwhelm the only way it knew how.
No swirling head.
No chest tightness.
Just the nausea, the stomach drop, and the need to shut everything else out.
So I did the only things I had access to in that moment.
I pictured roots dropping from my feet — down through the plane floor, through the clouds, back into the earth. Something solid to connect to when everything inside me felt unsteady.
And then I quietly used my body reset protocol, just through intention. Almost like plugging myself back in so my system could find its bearings.
Within 10 to 15 minutes, the shift was unmistakable.
My stomach steadied.
The nausea faded.
I could open my eyes again, breathe normally, take a sip of water.
By the time the snack and drink rolled around, I was completely myself again. Calm and present through landing. And the rest of the day unfolded like nothing had happened.
But the next morning, the feeling from the plane was there again — faint, but sitting in my body like a memory that hadn’t finished speaking. With another flight coming up in a few days, I thought, Right, let’s explore this properly.
With a body code session I took myself back to that moment of takeoff, gently.
And what came up surprised me: some imbalances anchored by two emotions from my time in the womb — Terror and Unsupported. The exact sensations that had washed through me on that plane, yet tied to something far older than flying.
As they cleared, the feeling softened…
and then it simply wasn’t there anymore. I couldn’t even connect in with it if I tried.
When I flew home five days later, the difference was unmistakeable.
My stomach didn’t drop.
There was no nausea.
No overwhelm.
No need to close my eyes.
I even listened to a podcast during the flight — grounded, present, steady.
What struck me most wasn’t the flying itself…
but the reminder of how the body carries stories long before we have the words for them.
How everyday moments can bring those stories up to be seen.
And how gently things can shift once we actually listen.
That flight became so much more than travel.
It became a doorway — into my body’s history, into understanding myself more deeply, and into the quiet power of the work I do every day.

27/11/2025

24/11/2025

Your body tells you the truth about how you value yourself long before your mind does.

It speaks in tiny shifts:

The jaw that clenches when you silence your needs.
The breath that shortens when you over-give.
The belly that sinks when you say yes but mean no.
The chest that tightens when you shrink yourself to stay safe.

These sensations are messages —
your earliest signals that something inside you is asking to be honoured.

Needs always show up in the body first.

A pull, a tightness, a flutter, a sinking.
A restlessness.
A heaviness.
A holding of the breath.

Every time you ignore these signals, your sense of worth quietly slips.
And every time you honour them — even in the smallest way — you invest in yourself.

A moment of stillness.
A slower pace.
A gentler choice.
A boundary that feels clean.
A breath that you allow to fully land.

These micro-investments change everything.

Because at some point, something inside you shifts.

Your body realises you’re no longer abandoning yourself.
You’re listening.
Responding.
Honouring.
Caring.

And when that happens, life begins to meet you differently.

People hear you more clearly.
Your boundaries land softly but firmly.
Opportunities feel easier to receive.
Your relationships become more mutual.
Your energy steadies.
Your breath deepens.

Self-value isn’t a mindset.
It’s a lived, embodied experience —
felt in the moment your body knows you’re finally on your own side.

If you feel the quiet pull to explore this more deeply…
to understand what your body has been trying to tell you…
or to unravel the patterns that make self-abandonment feel familiar —
I have space for deeper work.

No pressure.
Just an open invitation if your body whispers yes.

Melissa 🥰

https://thehealingbarn.as.me/

Supporting Your Healing Journey At The Healing Barn, Scott and Melissa Holdem offer holistic wellbeing services to empower you to heal your mind, body, and soul. Break free from repeating patterns and mental health struggles, including depression, anxiety, trauma, and relationship challenges. Experi

12/11/2025

✨ The quiet kind of change ✨

This work rarely arrives with fireworks or fanfare.
It’s not always the big, dramatic transformation we expect —
but the gentle, sacred kind that begins deep within.

At first, it can feel like nothing’s happening.
You sense something moving, yet can’t explain it.
The mind searches for proof, while the body softly whispers, “just listen.”

Because what’s really unfolding is communication —
your body, your energy, your heart beginning to speak in a language beyond words.
Each subtle shift is a message being received.
A nudge toward balance.
A reminder that something inside you is remembering the way home.

And then one day, without warning, the physical catches up.
A cycle quietly returns after years of absence.
A long-held ache eases as its story is finally heard.
A new calm settles in — not because you forced it, but because you allowed it.

Healing isn’t always loud.
It speaks through sensation, synchronicity, stillness.
Through the way your breath deepens,
and how the world feels just a little softer around you.

✨ The messages are always there — your body, your energy, and the universe whispering in harmony. ✨
All you need to do is listen.

Melissa 🥰

21/10/2025

It’s hard to put into words how powerful my work can be.
Each session is gentle, but what unfolds can reach layers far beyond what we consciously realise.

Often, emotions or old patterns that have been carried for years begin to shift — not through force, but through safety, awareness, and release.
Sometimes, what’s uncovered even connects across generations.

This beautiful reflection from a recent client touched me deeply:

“My first session with Melissa was absolutely incredible. Since then, I’ve had waves of emotion come up — but knowing they’ve been released, I’ve felt safe to simply let them move through me. It’s been so much easier not to get caught up in them, but instead to recognise them for what they were.

For the first time in my life, I have a deep sense and inner knowing that I’m going to be okay. There have been many tears — not of sadness or pain, but of pure gratitude and relief, as though I can finally let go.

I can’t quite express in words how much Melissa has helped me, especially at such a peak of emotional & physical overload. I also shared the post-session notes she gave me with my mum, who was deeply moved. She explained that the prenatal trapped emotion we uncovered was actually her own — directed toward my grandmother and her moral judgement when she was pregnant with me.

I’d always sensed this on some subconscious level, but hearing it confirmed was profoundly healing. It feels like both of us have finally been freed from that energy. I cannot wait for my next session with Melissa. I feel I’m finally in safe hands — and that I’m truly going to be okay through this holistic journey.

With love and gratitude,
A

08/10/2025

✨Your Body Already Knows What You Need ✨

My left knee had been quietly calling for attention lately.
At first, I thought it was just another flare-up—something physical that would ease with time.

But as I tuned in, I realised the tension wasn’t new. It was linked to an old horse accident that had injured my foot years ago. My body had remembered what my mind had long moved past.

That injury had subtly shaped the way I stood, walked, and supported myself. Over time, it had taken away some of the natural rotation in my knee—the flexibility I once had, both physically and in how I moved through life.

It’s fascinating how the body speaks.
Pain isn’t always asking to be fixed—it’s often asking to be understood.

✨ Reflection:
Where is your body holding tight to keep you safe?
What part of you might be ready to soften—
to trust stability enough to let movement, change, or life flow again?

Melissa 🥰

21/09/2025

✨ When I didn’t know what I needed ✨

Sometimes a memory pops up—the kind that still brings a pang of shame, guilt, or heaviness in my body.

And I find myself asking:
What did I really need in that moment?

Most of the time, I don’t have a clear answer.
Back then, I genuinely didn’t know what I needed.

But it makes me wonder… if I didn’t know what I needed, how could I have asked for it?
How could I have received it, even if it was offered?

And I think many of us carry this—an ache from the past, not only because of what happened, but because of what we couldn’t name.

🌿 These days, I’m learning that receiving starts with curiosity.
Even simply asking myself now, “What do I need?”—without rushing for the perfect answer—begins to open the door.

💭 I wonder, if you look back at one of those moments that still tugs at you… what did you really need then?

Melissa 🥰

18/09/2025

✨ New Reading for Kere ✨

Kiri asked a powerful question: “Is my path into spiritual work clear? Have I learnt enough to step into it?”

In this video, I dive into her Human Design and Tarot to explore:
🔑 Her core wound (Gate 43) – the challenge she’s here to move through
🌌 Her life’s work (Gate 61) – the deeper purpose that guides her path
🎴 Guidance from the Nine of Pentacles and Wheel of Fortune

This one’s quite a provoking reading — but it’s full of insight for anyone feeling the pull toward spiritual work.

👉 Watch here:

In this video, I dive into Kere’s big question: “Is my path into spiritual work clear? Have I learnt enough to step into it?”We explore her Human Design char...