Vanessa Rosé-Lia Guidance, Beauty & Healing

12/08/2025

You tell 'Em, Dr Tommy! 🥹🫶🥰

We all internalise so many damaging ideas around worthiness, beauty standards and shame,
A subconscious programming that makes us pick oursleves and others apart based on how we look.

When you decide to make critical and unsolicited commentary on someone's appearance, you are really just reflecting those sh*tty rules and lies you've been taught,
The ones that say you have to look a certain way to be loveable, attractive or worthy.

You don't.

When people say such things it can hurt, usually because we are still trying to unlearn those beliefs too,
and a part if us still feels like we aren't enough,
But really those unkind words are only a reflection of what they've been taught or wounded with,
not of you at all.

Don't dump your shame and judgment on other people,
Just Learn to release it,
and realise noone has to look or dress a set way to be worthy of love, kindness or basic respect. 🫶

~Vanessa Rosé-lia 🌹✨

In response to the “what people think those born in 1992 look like”

I’ve had offers to fix my hairline for free….. and even get paid to do it. I could easily afford it myself. But I’ve chosen not to.
Why?

For a long time, I was self-conscious about my hairline. I even had a long, honest conversation with my beautiful wife about it and even discussed with close friends who have had hair transplants. Eventually, I realized something important: I didn’t dislike my hairline because of me……I disliked it because I was trying to live up to the world’s “standard” of what a man should look like.

That moment pulled me back to my core. It reminded me of the work I’ve done to love myself for who I am…… not just what I see in the mirror. It’s the same battle I’ve been fighting since overcoming childhood obesity: to stop letting my value be defined by appearance.

So here’s where I stand and why I choose not to “fix it”
Because beauty is fleeting.
Because my time, energy, and resources are better spent elsewhere.
Because my journey is about self-love, not self-editing to appease the world
Because I refuse to chase the world’s shifting standards of beauty.

This isn’t about judging anyone who makes a different choice your body, your decision. For me, it’s about standing in the truth that my worth is not tied to my hair, my face, or anyone else’s approval.

Self-love isn’t about perfecting what you see…..it’s about accepting it. And I’m not trading that for anything.

18/07/2025

💜✨

✨ The skies are whispering: slow down, listen deeply, and let the unfolding happen in its own rhythm. The universe is revealing the truth of who you are. You’re being guided back to yourself. 🌙
Love Always,
Alyonna Angelica

16/07/2025

I've been quiet.
I've been struggling.
I've been healing.
I've been isolated.
I've been growing.
And I know many others have too.

🎊🎉💜
100 days in a row today!
I never thought I'd be able to reach this number.
🙌🥹🫶😭

Even though my health and functioning has been challenging,
I've managed to check in to my selfcare app each day,
and put in all I've done or managed,
(although sometimes all I could manage would be the check in, and sending/receiving friend vibes).

But that's okay,
We use the spoons we have that day and that's enough. 🥄

Nothing is too small,
and all help shift my focus to small wins for that day,
even if it's just getting out of bed,
Or having my supplements and medication.

Equally I celebrate the times in the past I couldn't check in, I felt unable to function,
and my streak ended,
Which is also okay.
🫶
I didn't give up,
Or think there was no point anymore,
As having compassion for the times we fall down
- being okay with stumbling,
and feeling frustrated, sad or unable,
is just as important a part of our journey too.

Yesterday I got a important reminder from myself,
A reflection from spirit that came back to me, one I'd receive years ago,
new wording and expansion,
same powerful message :

✨Remember,
in truth we are already whole, healed, enough and worthy.

When we speak and embark on healing and growth it can be easy to forget that,
and always strive to heal - to BE more or DO more from a place of feeling small, lesser than,
Rather than from a place of love and unfolding.

We forget that we ARE already enough and complete,
underneath,
within our authentic, true self.

We forget as we've been to made to believe otherwise - That who we truly are isn't enough,
that we need to be perfect,
present a certain way,
or strive to be different,
better,
be both less,
and also more.

From this place we don't try or grow because we deserve more
- More safety, love, functioning, capacity and joy (which we do!)
But instead from a place of lacking, pressure and failure.

We can think of healing in a different way:
Releasing the lies, trauma and pain that weigh us down,
that have made us believe We are unworthy, not enough or lovable,
and find, underneath it all,
we always have been,
it was just the lies masquerading as truth, that made us believe we weren't.

We just needed to release the heaviness of those lies to remember,
and connect to, and see our deeper, true selves again.

We don't need to do or be anything to earn love - to be enough,
No set physical appearance, weight, job, house, partner, notoriety or money is needed for us to be worthy or loved,
that's those lies and fear talking.

We heal by feeling and releasing all we are not,
striving to meet ourselves with compassion, so we can connect to who we really are, then choose and grow in alignment with that.

We release all the horrible lies, shame, and failure we've been made to believe we were,
To reconnect to who we have truly been all along:
loveable,
worthy,
complete and enough,
at every stage of our journey.

This also means meeting ourselves with kindness and grace,
when we inevitably stumble, and these deep held beliefs of not-enoughness are bellowing in our hearts and heads.

We are Both a growing work in progress, and masterpiece all in one,
- evolving, yet priceless at each and every moment,
- expanding, yet complete,
- both light and dark parts,
- perfectly imperfect

We are learning to release the shame of perfectionism, to create space for all of our parts,
To reconnect to them all,
so we may truly see, accept, and love all of ourselves, and each other, throughout the journey,
the messy missteps as much as the big wins,
Because in Truth,
they all help us become, remember, and connect,
and are opportunities to learn and grow,
To feel,
To experience,
And that all has value,
As do you. 💜

Don't let those loud, critical voices drown that out.
You are enough and loveable,
Just as you are right now,
And you always have been. 🫂🫶✨

~Vanessa Rosé-lia
🌹✨

15/05/2025

So very important. 💜✨

What is a nervous system bypass?

In the pursuit of healing, we often seek what feels fast, “transformational,” or relieves us of our pain. Bypass happens when we use a healing pathway to avoid the realities that are perceived as painful, difficult to accept, or confusing.

We’ve seen this with spiritual bypass: using spiritual pathways and concepts to transcend pain rather than embrace it. We can also bypass through excessive mental processing—endlessly analyzing our wounds but never actually metabolizing them through the body them.

But there’s a quieter form emerging now—nervous system bypass. Using the nervous system work because it will "solve" everything. Instead of being helpful, it becomes another form of bypass.

Yes, nervous system work is essential. It helps us regulate, reconnect, and feel safer in our bodies. But if we treat it like the new “cure-all,” it can become another way we avoid pain. When we only focus on regulation and avoid the grief, anger, or emotional discomfort beneath, we’re not healing—we’re bypassing.

No single pathway, method, or modality is the holy grail of helaing. Healing isn’t about escaping the hard stuff but meeting it with presence. The most sustainable transformation I’ve experienced includes the whole system: mind, body, emotions, and soul.

Spirituality and nervous system work are necessary. But when used to avoid emotional reality, they become portals of survival, not wholeness. And when used without enough clarity and discernment, they can potentially create more pressure and confusion than ease.

It’s not just about safety—it’s about truth. Not just about regulation—but about contact with life, with grief, with love, with the parts of you that need more than "one thing".

If you’re ready for a path that doesn’t bypass, but gently meets you where you are—emotionally, somatically, and truthfully—the Self Attunement Audio Toolkit is here. With guided practices that honor your pace, it helps you reconnect with your body, emotions, and inner safety—one moment at a time.

Comment "Attuned' or visit my profile to get your copy.

Love,
Ally.

14/05/2025

I adore LOTR! 🥹🥰

I am:
☀️Eowyn sun
🌙Merry moon
✨Galandriel rising.

What are you?

05/05/2025

🫶🥰🥹✨

Book: https://bit.ly/the_stregth_in_our_scars 🤍

03/05/2025

I have had powerful, personal reminders of this during a week of feeling extra unwell, and unable to function.

It came to me in wonderful conversations, where I let my inner pain and feelings be witnessed and shared outwardly,
and was met with complete validation, by both myself and the other person.
No attempt to fix or change the feelings,
just support in releasing and listening to what the pain had to say. 🫶

When we have so often felt:
alone,
unseen,
unheard,
unloved,
Invalidated or misunderstood,

Being loved,
witnessed,
and accepted in our most vulnerable feelings and moments,
-The times we most often feel imperfect, unlovable, and not enough-
Becomes deeply healing and precious.

What we often need in moments of deep pain, is to receive what we were denied the most during vulnerable times in our past:

security,
safety,
acceptance,
support and love.

So much of what we all need is to feel,
Not to always try solve, or fix,
But just to feel without shame or suppression.

We all need and deserve to have someone Hold our hand,
Listen,
Look into our eyes and see us,
Witness us,
Hold us in love and empathy,
and say with their presence,
or their words:

"I hear you.
Your feelings are valid,
You are valid,
And I care.
I'm here with you,
to witness you, your feelings and your experiences with love.
You are safe with me."

And gosh, wouldn't the world be a different place, if everyone was able to give and receive this depth of love with each other? 🥹🥲💜✨🫶

~ Vanessa Rosé-lia 🌹✨

28/04/2025

💜✨🥹🥰

Don’t cling, chase, or plead for a connection that no longer aligns.
You are a radiant being of light, and you deserve relationships that are genuine, loyal, loving, and respectful.

Love Always,
Alyonna Angelica

12/04/2025

So much healing and growth lies on the other side of our discomfort,
In stepping outside our comfort zone. 💜🫶✨

~Vanessa Rosé-Lia 🌹✨