Rebecca Scheibmair - Clinical Psychologist

12/02/2022

23/10/2021

Life feeling all a bit serious at the moment? I was asked this week in a new weekly local feature 'On the Couch' about how why we should be laughing and how we can get a bit more laughter in our lives.

There’s a strong case for prioritising humour in our lives – we take a look at why we don’t laugh more and what we can do about it.Dr Rebecca Scheibmair is a practicing clinical psychologist here in C...

13/08/2021

1 thing you can do to help a loved one stuck on a waitlist for a psychologist :

“I can tell you’re struggling, how can I help? Do you want to talk about it? hang out but not talk about it? Can I make you a meal? Can I give you a hug? I care about you. “

09/08/2021

I love seeing initiatives like this in the media. I am passionate about challenging our 'harden up' culture and allowing people to feel. It is a big part of what makes us human. Every day I work with men and women who have shut out their emotions and struggled on.

Being able to open up, feel, and talk about our feelings gives us both freedom to choose the life we want and to build connection with others. Let's soften up. ❤

Male mental health movement 'Soften Up Bro' are calling on men to embrace their emotions.

16/07/2021

For an Aotearoa where psychological support and therapy is accessible and equitable, and where people can access therapy before they reach crisis point.

14/07/2021

It is great that people are getting better at asking for help and it is very disheartening when they finally reach out and get told there is no space for them or that they have to go on a waiting list. Unfortunately here in Central Otago is no different.

The system needs to change and it is going to take time for this to happen. In the meantime let's think about lcreative community initiatives that might support people now and how we can also be there for each other.

Some are turning away as many as 60 clients a month because they have no space.

09/06/2021

How are you doing today? Try this quick self check-in to identify worries and support yourself through the day ♥️

Thanks My Self-Love Supply for the awesome illy.

27/04/2021

"There is that stigma, especially with males that you are too much of a man to want to talk about it. I was one of those men. I was a man's man, and to be able to go and talk to someone was really hard but it has literally made the world of difference."

Total respect for someone who not only shows the courage to challenge themselves to the limit but most importantly open up about struggling with mental wellbeing and reaching out for help. There is no shame in struggle or in asking for help.

Please share this message and donate to support Mark and the Mental Health Foundation who do great work to also spread this message and provide support.

https://events.mentalhealth.org.nz/fundraisers/markbasson

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aFaMKPJ4yB4

Cook Brothers Construction's very own Mark Basson, Southern Lakes carpenter and FENZ volunteer, is attempting to break the Guinness World Record to run the f...

15/12/2020

As we are full swing in the silly season, remember to take the time to slow down and remember what matters...

"Modern man thinks he loses something - time - when he does not do things quickly; yet he does not know what to do with the time he gains except kill it."

- Erich Fromm

17/11/2020

Just because you are carrying the load and your mind says 'well so is everyone right now' doesn't mean it's not hard. Be kind to yourself.

02/11/2020

So very well said - attending to our mental wellbeing should be something we are proud of, can feel ok to share, and encourage in others. Speaking to a professional takes great courage and strength, and is certainly not a weakness. Life throws a lot at us and it's often no surprise we struggle at times!

So would you admit you've attended therapy? If not, why not? Let's help break the stigma. ❤

Would you admit you have attended therapy? If not, WHY not? How is it different to another specialist such a personal trainer, a business mentor, a physio or an optometrist? How is it in any way shameful to say you prioritise well-being when so many aspects of your life (your physical health, brain health, work performance etc) and relationships are affected by it?

People are slooooowly getting better at opening up. There is an exciting movement towards overt displays of vulnerability and humanness (apparently that’s a word?!). But we need to challenge the remaining stigma. We need to tackle it head on. Futures literally depend on it. Those futures may be your partners’, children’s, friends’, colleagues’. When they need mental health support, wouldn’t it be terrible if stigma was the barrier to treatment!

If you attend therapy, you should congratulate yourself. You should be proud that you are insightful and proactive. You should be proud that you are open-minded to new perspectives and new helpful behaviours. Finally, you should be proud for prioritising your loved ones whom directly benefit from your improved well-being.

As I’ve mentioned countless times before, anxiety and depression don’t discriminate. My clients are varied including high achievers in sport, media and business. Struggling with mental health is not defined as ‘failure’ or ‘weak’. We are a product of our genetic predispositions, our early experiences, our interactions and our fast-paced society. So, why take the backseat and let life happen to you?! Taking responsibility to learn coping skills and work through the ‘hard stuff’ is both admirable and impressive.

Therapy should be normalised.

So, if you are brave and want to help me break the stigma of attending therapy, LIKE this post or COMMENT below. And I will too 💓

(Gorgeous drawing by Jay Allen, who illustrated ‘My Coping Skills Journal‘) 🎨

05/06/2020

Sometimes people around you won't understand your journey. That's ok, it's not for them.

How would you journey if you knew no one was watching? That's your path. And you will know you are on that path if the steps you take make you feel freer in the taking of them.

20/05/2020

Don't let perfection get in the way of done.

I find myself having to work through barriers such as this again and again. My latest experience was in creating my website over the past few weeks. My mind had lots to say about not being good enough, unfavourable comparisons with others, fears of looking silly, and much more!

It feels incredibly vulnerable to put yourself out there, but until you do that you can't be seen; and someone out there may be missing out on what you can give.

So here goes... centralotagopsychology.co.nz

If I can do it, so can you. ❤

17/05/2020

It's ok if you feel like you weren't productive enough during the time of lockdown. Your social media feeds may have been full of friends baking up a storm, starting an epic new project, being creative with their kids, or getting incredibly fit. Your greatest achievement might have felt like making it through each day and that is perfectly valid!

We are wired to connect to others and part of that is comparing ourselves to others to make sure we are fitting in. While it makes sense that we do this, it is not always helpful. And social media or the person you see in front of you is often not the whole picture.

When you pay attention to this dialogue of not good enough, does it lead you closer to the life you want to live/person you want to be; or somewhere else? Often somewhere else right?...snappy at the people we care about, wasting more time on your phone or watching TV, or avoiding hard stuff...

So acknowledge that dialogue (we all have it) but realise we don't have to be a slave to it. Acknowledge how difficult it has been and what you were able to do despite that. And then ask what can I do right now or what steps can I take towards living the kind of life I want to live? One step at a time and be kind.

15/05/2020

I hope you are settling back into whatever your new normal looks like at Level 2. Remember to take your time, adjust at your own pace where you can, and be kind to yourself.

For some, getting back to the pace of normal life is what we have been waiting for, some are not ready, and for some this may be terrifying! Some people may be grieving the loss of extra time with family and space for quieter pursuits lockdown created; and some may be rejoicing the space and time with their family coming out of lockdown is allowing. There is no right way to feel.

Take your time and choose what you want to let back into your life; and what you might just let slip away to create your new normal.

11/05/2020

We know there's bound to be an enormous mix of reactions to this afternoon’s announcement. It's okay to be excited about the changes level two brings, and it's also okay to be anxious or overwhelmed.

Those close to you will be feeling a range of emotions – be sure to check in on them as we all adjust to this new phase.

04/05/2020

We might all be in the same boat, but the intensity of this storm and how we weather it is different for everyone so as our government is trying to figure out how to ease back to free our lives - please remember:

🛑 Some people don’t agree with the suggested reopening.... that’s okay. Be kind.

🏡 Some people are still planning to stay at home.... that’s okay. Be kind.

🦠 Some are still scared of getting the virus and a second wave happening....that’s okay. Be kind.

🧘🏼‍♀️ Some people are glad to heal their mental health issues from the lockdown ....that’s okay. Be kind.

👫👭👬 Some people need the touch of other human beings after being isolated alone ....that’s okay. Be kind.

💰 Some are sighing with relief to go back to work knowing they may possibly save their business or their homes....that’s okay. Be kind.

👩🏾‍⚕️Some are thankful they can finally have a surgery they have put off....that’s okay. Be kind.

📝 Some will be able to attend interviews after weeks without a job....that’s okay. Be kind.

😷 Some will wear masks for weeks....that’s okay. Be kind.

💅🏻 Some people will rush out to get the hair or nails done.... that’s okay. Be kind.

❤️ The point is, everyone has different viewpoints/feelings and that’s okay. Be kind.

We each have a different story. If you need to stay home, stay home. But be kind.

If you need to go out, just respect others when in public and be kind!

Don’t judge fellow humans because you’re not in their story.

We all are in different Financial - and - Mental states than we were months ago. So remember, be kind.

Copy, paste, and share as a reminder to BE KIND! ♥️

23/04/2020

Many times in life difficult things happen that are completely out of our control, including in our current situation. Instead of struggling against that which we have no control over, it can be helpful to focus on what we CAN do. A question I find very useful to ask...

'What do I want to stand for in the face of this?'

22/04/2020

Sometimes when life throws us a curveball it can allow us to be more open to change and trying new things. I did not imagine being predominantly an online therapist but at Alert Level 4 & Alert Level 3 that's a change we have all had to embrace. Thank you to all those who have taken that leap with me - online sessions or Teletherapy has been working well.

So don't feel like you need to wait until after the lockdown if you think therapy may be useful. There are many therapists offering online sessions so don't be afraid to get in touch with someone, even just for an initial chat to see if this may work for you.

20/04/2020

Even though lots of things will remain the same at Alert Level 3, it is worthwhile thinking about what might change for you as we slowly come out of the bubble. For lots of reasons this might cause anxiety and that's ok. Sometimes when we haven't done things for a while we have to ease back into it. Be kind to yourself and don't expect yourself to go back to normal just like that.

12/04/2020

We are likely to have a lot of different feelings as the lockdown continues, especially with the uncertainty we face. And all of these feelings are normal and ok. Be kind to yourself.

It's normal to be experiencing a rollercoaster of emotions in these unusual times, they just want to be felt, heard and comforted. Notice and name the sensations as they arise in your body and welcome them all with loving awareness and compassion 🐰

31/03/2020

A nice reminder that a perspective change can make a big difference...even when we find ourselves in challenging times. Be kind to yourself everyone. ❤

26/03/2020

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23/03/2020

This is good advice not only for our kids but some of these things apply to adults too. None of us have been through this before and through these uncertain times we will have ups and downs. Think about what is important, take care of yourself and those you care about, and be kind. ❤

A letter from school principal and teacher.....
Dear parents with school aged children

You might be inclined to create a minute by minute schedule for your kids. You have high hopes of hours of learning, including online activities, science experiments, and book reports. You’ll limit technology until everything is done! But here’s the thing...

Our kids are just as scared as we are right now. Our kids not only can hear everything that is going on around them, but they feel our constant tension and anxiety. They have never experienced anything like this before. Although the idea of being off of school for weeks sounds awesome, they are probably picturing a fun time like summer break, not the reality of being trapped at home and not seeing their friends.

Over the coming weeks, you will see an increase in behavior issues with your kids. Whether it’s anxiety, or anger, or protest that they can’t do things normally - it will happen. You’ll see more meltdowns, tantrums, and oppositional behavior in the coming weeks. This is normal and expected under these circumstances.

What kids need right now is to feel comforted and loved. To feel like it’s all going to be ok. And that might mean that you tear up your perfect schedule and love on your kids a bit more. Play outside and go on walks. Bake cookies and paint pictures. Play board games and watch movies. Do a science experiment together or find virtual field trips of the zoo. Start a book and read together as a family. Snuggle under warm blankets and do nothing.

Don’t worry about them regressing in school. Every single kid is in this boat and they all will be ok. When we are back in the classroom, we will all course correct and meet them where they are. Teachers are experts at this! Don’t pick fights with your kids because they don’t want to do math. Don’t scream at your kids for not following the schedule. Don’t mandate 2 hours of learning time if they are resisting it.

If I can leave you with one thing, it’s this: at the end of all of this, your kids’ mental health will be more important than their academic skills. And how they felt during this time will stay with them long after the memory of what they did during those weeks is long gone. So keep that in mind, every single day...

25/08/2018

People need to stop their judgey comments when it comes to mental illness.

24/08/2018

Mike King echoes what is at the core of my work...there is no such thing as an abnormal thought. It's when we start paying attention to our thoughts, especially the unhelpful ones, that there is a problem...and when we see having these thoughts or difficult feelings as an illness.

Let's all begin to be more real - none of us has it all together all of the time, and pretending we do is hurting us all. Be kind to yourself and others. ❤

"There's one sign and one sign only people are suicidal - if they tell you," says King.