Wellness Journey Center NZ

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The art of Health and Wellbeing"The Doctor of the future will give no medications but will interest his patient in the care of the human frame, in diet and in the cause and prevention of disease" Thomas A Edison

04/01/2026
We here a lot about forgiveness and turning over a new leaf with the New Year. We are told to 'Forgive this' and ' forgi...
03/01/2026

We here a lot about forgiveness and turning over a new leaf with the New Year.
We are told to 'Forgive this' and ' forgive that person or act' and if we don't then we are the ones that suffer....blah blah blah... Here's my take on that:

When forgiveness is weaponized, it stops being a pathway to healing and becomes a tool of control. Instead of allowing space for truth, accountability, and repair, forgiveness is demanded prematurely — often before harm is even acknowledged. In these situations, the focus shifts away from what happened and onto how quickly the victim can “let it go.” This isn’t spiritual maturity; it’s emotional bypassing.
One of the most damaging aspects is how accountability is reframed as bitterness. When a survivor asks for responsibility, change, or safety, they are accused of being unforgiving, divisive, or stuck in the past. This tactic protects the person who caused harm while isolating the person who was hurt. Over time, victims learn that speaking honestly costs them community, while silence keeps them accepted.
Scripture is often used to rush a process that cannot be rushed. Verses about forgiveness are quoted without context, while passages about repentance, restitution, and fruit worthy of change are ignored. Apologies are replaced with spiritual language, and reconciliation is pushed without evidence of transformed behaviour. What is presented as grace is actually avoidance — avoidance of discomfort, confrontation, and responsibility.
The psychological impact is heavy. Victims begin to doubt their own pain, wondering if they are sinful for still hurting. Boundaries feel selfish. Anger feels dangerous. The nervous system remains stuck because safety was never restored. Forgiveness, when forced, doesn’t bring peace — it deepens confusion and self-blame.
The hard truth is this: forgiveness without accountability does not heal relationships, protect victims, or reflect justice. It preserves systems that benefit from silence and resets harm instead of ending it. True forgiveness is a personal process, not a public performance. And it was never meant to replace accountability — it was meant to follow truth, not erase it.

01/01/2026

This is gold.

31/12/2025

Happy New Year

31/12/2025

🎆 A NEW YEAR’S REMINDER
(Not “new year, new you.” More like: new moment, same you — with more choice.)

If you live with C-PTSD, trauma, or the long echo of survival,
I want to gently interrupt the pressure of January 1st.

Because while “New Year, New Me” can be motivating for some,
for survivors it can quietly feel like:

• another measuring stick
• another performance
• another open loop your brain has to track
• another reminder of everything you’re “behind” on

And here’s the neuropsychology most people never mention:

🧠 Open goals increase anxiety.
This is called the Zeigarnik Effect — unfinished intentions stay active in the brain.
For a nervous system already carrying high cognitive load, a resolution isn’t just hope…
it’s another “don’t fail” signal pinging the threat center.

So let’s ground this in reality.

*:•.•:*

🧠 THE CORE TRUTH

The New Year isn’t powerful because it’s special.

It’s special because it reminds us of something trauma makes easy to forget:

👉 Change is always available.

Not just today.
Not just this week.
Not just in January.

Every day is a new day.
Every moment is a new data point.
Every pause is a chance to choose again — or choose rest.
•:*:•.

🧠 FOR THE TRAUMA NERVOUS SYSTEM

Healing does not happen on a calendar.

You don’t “reset” on January 1st because your body isn’t a planner —
it’s a historian.

And here’s an important neuroscience piece:

🧠 The amygdala doesn’t understand linear time.
To a trauma brain, 1999 and 2024 can feel like the same moment.

Calendars are a prefrontal cortex concept.
Trauma lives in the limbic system — timeless, sensory, relational.

Your nervous system tracks:
• safety
• threat
• patterns
• repair
• rupture and return

So sometimes the biggest “change” you make isn’t visible at all.

It’s:
• awareness forming quietly
• a belief loosening its grip
• a boundary taking shape internally
• a reaction softening by 2%
• choosing not to override your body

That counts.
Even if it doesn’t look impressive.

*:•.•:*

🧠 WINDOWS OF TOLERANCE (THIS MATTERS)

Trauma narrows the Window of Tolerance.

That means:
• less room between calm and overwhelm
• faster nervous system overrides
• smaller margins for error

Some days, doing nothing is a high-level skill because it prevented collapse, dissociation, or reactive harm.

Widening the window is the work.
Not forcing productivity inside it.
•:*:•.

🧠 ABOUT TIMELINES (LET’S BE HONEST)

Your timeline was never supposed to look like everyone else’s.

Some people built their lives with:
• emotional safety
• financial buffers
• secure attachment
• people who believed them

If you didn’t have that?

You weren’t lazy.
You weren’t unmotivated.
You weren’t “bad at healing.”

You were surviving without a net.

And survival is labor.

Invisible labor.
Unpaid labor.
Life-preserving labor.

*:•.•:*

🧠 YOU DIDN’T MISS ANYTHING

If the last year was about:
• staying alive
• staying regulated
• staying quiet
• staying small
• staying safe

You didn’t fail the year.

You learned things most people only understand in theory —
and you learned them through your body.

That’s not behind.

That’s experience.
•:*:•.

🧠 WHAT CHANGE ACTUALLY LOOKS LIKE (TRAUMA-REALISTIC EDITION)

Change doesn’t have to be loud.

It can be:
• minute-to-minute
• day-by-day
• year-by-year
• subconscious before conscious
• slow before solid

You’re allowed to choose:
• radical change
• incremental change
• no change today because your body said “not yet”

Safety is not optional.

Safety is the prerequisite.

*:•.•:*

🧠 A NOTE ON “CONSISTENCY”

Consistency is a privilege of the regulated.

For trauma survivors, rhythm is more realistic.

Healing isn’t a straight line — it’s a series of returns.

And every return counts.

That’s not failure.
That’s nervous system repair.
•:*:•.

🧠 INTERGENERATIONAL WEIGHT

Some of what you’re carrying was never just yours.

Epigenetics tells us stress, fear, and survival patterns travel through generations.

So if all you did today was rest?

That might have been a radical act of breaking a lineage of survival-performance.

*:•.•:*

🧠 MICRO-MOMENT HEALING (THIS IS REAL CHANGE)

On January 1st, progress might look like:
• feeling your feet on the floor
• noticing your breath
• unclenching your jaw
• eating without rushing
• saying “not today” without explaining

Interoception — the ability to feel your internal state — is one of the first things trauma steals.

Reclaiming it is not small.

It’s foundational.
•:*:•.

🎇 FINAL REMINDER

The New Year is not a deadline.

It’s a reminder.

A reminder that:
• you still have choice
• you still have agency
• you still have yourself
• you are allowed to move at your own pace

And if today isn’t the day you start something new?

Tomorrow exists.
Next month exists.
So does next year.

You’re not late.

You’re moving at the speed of safety.

And that’s not weakness —
that’s wisdom shaped by things you never should have had to survive.

I see you.
I believe you.
And I’m here for whatever pace your healing takes.

Here’s to a year that meets you where you are —
not where the world thinks you “should” be. 🖤

*:•.•:*

Merry Christmas and happy holidays to one and all, don't forget to get outdoors and enjoy nature. Much love and see you ...
26/12/2025

Merry Christmas and happy holidays to one and all, don't forget to get outdoors and enjoy nature. Much love and see you all in 2026.

Stress at this time of year as well
26/12/2025

Stress at this time of year as well

Your body is  a blessing 🙌
18/10/2025

Your body is a blessing 🙌

18/09/2025
16/09/2025

There is some research suggesting that acetaminophen (known as paracetamol in many countries; “Panadol” is a brand of acetaminophen) may reduce empathy — both for people’s physical/social pain and for their positive emotions. Below is a summary of key studies, what they found, possible mechanisms, and caveats.

What the studies say

1. Empathy for pain / social pain

A study by Mischkowski, Crocker & Way (2016) found that people who took 1,000 mg acetaminophen reported lower empathy for others’ physical pain and social pain, compared to those who got placebo.

For example, after acetaminophen, participants rated others’ pain in hypothetical scenarios as less severe, felt less personal distress, etc.

2. Empathy for positive experiences (positive empathy)

A more recent study (“A Social Analgesic? Acetaminophen (Paracetamol) Reduces Positive Empathy”) found that acetaminophen reduces affective responses when people read about uplifting or positive experiences of others. Participants reported less “personal pleasure” and fewer empathic feelings directed toward others’ positive outcomes.

Importantly, it did not significantly affect how positive they thought the event was, or how much pleasure the protagonist in the scenario felt—but their own emotional response (i.e. “sharing in” the positive) was dampened.

3. Neurobiology / rat models

In animal studies, acetaminophen has been shown to reduce “empathy-like” behavior (for example, helping or responding to distressed conspecifics) in rats. This was correlated with lower levels of oxytocin and vasopressin in brain regions (prefrontal cortex, amygdala) thought to underpin social/emotional behavior.

Also, brain imaging work in humans finds that acetaminophen reduces activation in brain areas associated with physical pain, social pain, emotional distress, such as the anterior insula and anterior cingulate cortex.

Possible mechanisms

The neurologic overlap between physical pain and emotional/social pain/affective empathy is important. Areas like the anterior insula, anterior cingulate are involved in both. When acetaminophen dampens response to physical pain (its “analgesic” effect), it might also reduce response to emotional or social suffering.

There may be effects on neurotransmitters/neurohormones (in animal work, oxytocin & vasopressin) that are involved in social bonding/empathy.

It seems to reduce affective reactivity more than cognitive evaluation. That is, people still understand or perceive what others are going through, but their emotional “sharing” or “felt empathy” is lowered.

Important caveats & what's not known

Effect size: The reductions in empathy are not huge; they are statistically detectable in controlled settings. But it's unclear how large or meaningful those effects are in day-to-day life and whether they matter socially. Studies tend to use relatively large doses (e.g. ~1000 mg) and short time frames.

Dose, frequency, context: Most studies test one or a few doses, not long-term usage. We don’t know well how frequent/long-term — or clinically recommended use — influences empathy over time. Also, some studies find no effect, especially in less extreme situations.

Individual differences: Baseline empathy traits may matter. Some people might be more or less affected. Also whether one is already in physical pain, or emotionally distracted, etc.

Cognitive vs affective components: Many studies show the affective (feeling) component is more dampened; the cognitive component (recognizing someone’s pain; understanding their emotional state) is less affected. So “lack of empathy” is not total — more a reduction in “feeling with” others, rather than in recognizing.

Human relevance: Animal studies show empathy-like behavior reduced under acetaminophen, but extrapolation to humans is partial. Also human studies are often with healthy volunteers, using scenarios or hypothetical tasks, not actual interpersonal behavior in natural settings.

Summary & Implications

There is reasonable evidence that acetaminophen / paracetamol (i.e. Panadol) can reduce empathy in certain circumstances: particularly, it dampens how much people feel the pains or joys of others, rather than how much they intellectually understand them.

The effects appear when people take a full dose (or a substantial dose) in experimental settings, and are more evident with emotional or social pain, or positive empathy (feeling joy for others), than mere cognitive perception of others’ experience.

This doesn’t mean that a single use of Panadol will “make you unempathetic” in a lasting way. But it does raise interesting questions about how commonly used “mood-blunting” effects of analgesics might influence social interactions, emotional sensitivity, decision making, etc

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