The Safe Kids Project

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The Safe Kids Project

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27/11/2025

If you’ve ever felt that knot in your stomach before walking into a family gathering… you’re not imagining it.

You’re carrying the mental load of being the parent who gets it , the parent who sees their child’s cues long before anyone else does.

Maybe you’ve stood at the door rehearsing the same lines in your head:

“Please don’t force hugs.”
“Please give them space.”
“Please just respect their no.”

Maybe you’ve braced yourself for the sigh, the eye roll, or the subtle comment that makes you question whether you’re being “too much.”

But here’s the truth:

You’re not the problem.
You’re not dramatic.

And you’re definitely not alone.

You’re simply trying to protect your child in an environment that hasn’t caught up yet.

And that takes courage most people never see but feel deeply.

If this felt a little too familiar… keep your eyes open over the next few days. I have something special coming that will support you through moments just like this, so you can walk into the holidays with more ease and confidence. 🎄

19/11/2025

You’re at a family gathering.

Everyone is happy, relaxed, chatting… and then someone you love, someone your child adores, leans in for a hug.

You gently step in with, “Let’s ask them first.”
And suddenly you feel like the “difficult” parent.

Not because they’re unkind.
Not because they don’t love your child.

But because this way of parenting is new to them.
They don’t understand yet.

They see boundaries as criticism… instead of protection.

But here’s the truth I always come back to:

Our children need years of practice listening to their body and saying no to people they love and trust.

Because one day, they’ll be teenagers.

And one day, someone, maybe a friend, maybe someone they care about, will cross a line.

And when that moment comes, I want my child to have a history of “No, thank you,” in their body.

A memory of being allowed to say no.

A practiced confidence that their boundaries matter.

That’s why we ask.
That’s why we pause.

That’s why we teach it now, when the stakes are small and the love is safe.

If you want to learn the exact conversations I use with family and friends, send me a DM and we can chat.

14/11/2025

We often say “Give me a hug!” without thinking.

It feels harmless, a way to connect, to feel loved.

But what if our need for affection teaches our children to ignore their own?

When a child says no to a hug, they’re not being rude.
They’re being honest.

They’re listening to their body and that’s something we should celebrate, not correct.

Love isn’t about compliance.

It’s about safety.

And when a child feels safe enough to say no, that’s love in action.

Want to help your child grow up confident in their boundaries?

Comment CARDS below and I’ll send you my FREE Body Safety Affirmation Cards daily reminders that empower children to trust their bodies and their choices.

13/11/2025

Do you feel triggered when another child crosses your child’s body boundary?

I remember the first time this happened with my son he was only one.

An older child kept grabbing at him during play, and I waited, hoping their parent would step in. But they didn’t.
I felt that wave of frustration, why aren’t they saying something?

Then I realised… this was my role.

Not just to protect my child, but to model what calm, confident boundary-setting looks like.

So I took a breath, crouched down, and said gently but firmly,

“It looks like he’d like some space right now.”

Then I guided the other child:
“Can you look at his face — what’s that telling you?”

“What about his body — what do you notice?”

“Is he using his voice to tell you something?”

That moment did more than keep my son safe.

It helped the other child learn what respecting boundaries actually looks and feels like.

Because body safety isn’t just one person’s job, it’s something we build together, as a community of caring adults who all have a role in keeping children safe.

I went from feeling reactive and unsure to grounded and confident, knowing exactly how to step in calmly and clearly.

If you want that same unshakable confidence when it comes to protecting your child’s boundaries,
To know exactly what to say and how to say it, Comment INTEREST below and I’ll send you details about Foundations of Body Safety, my 6-week signature program.

The waitlist is now open.

12/11/2025

“I was never given a choice.”

So many mothers have told me this: “I was forced to hug relatives, even when my body screamed no. Even when I said no out loud, I was still made to comply. Now it’s ingrained, I must please others, I must not offend. I didn’t know how to say no, or that my feelings mattered.”

I hear you. That feeling of having your boundaries ignored, it leaves a mark. It teaches us to put others’ comfort above our own, to hide what we feel, to doubt our own bodies.

But we are doing things differently.

We are raising children who get to feel safe saying no, who know their body belongs to them, and who get to choose how they greet someone, whether it’s a hug, a wave, a high-five, or even just a smile.

This is more than teaching manners. This is teaching autonomy, confidence, and self-respect. It’s giving our children the tools to communicate their needs without fear of offending. And it’s something we can start right now, by modeling choice and reinforcing it consistently.

Start small. Before a greeting, ask: “Do you want to hug, high-five, or wave?” Let them decide. Honor their choice every time. Teach those around them to honor it too.

👋 Share this with someone who regularly greets your child, a grandparent, friend, or teacher, so they can support your child’s boundaries and help them grow up knowing their voice matters.

10/11/2025

It is not our job to measure love by how affection looks.

I took some time away this weekend to reconnect with myself. I missed my daughter, her voice, her hugs, her little quirks. As I drove home, I could already picture her running toward me, wrapping her arms around my neck, telling me how much she missed me.

But that’s not what happened.

She looked up, said “Hey Mum,” and kept walking.

I stood there, my heart sinking a little. The questions came quickly, Did she miss me? Did I do something wrong?

That ache, I know so many parents have felt it. We crave those big, movie-scene reunions. We want to feel wanted, needed, adored. But when I paused, I realised something so powerful…

Her casual “Hey Mum” wasn’t distance. It was comfort.

It was her feeling safe.

It was her knowing she didn’t have to perform love for me.

I am her safe person, the one she doesn’t have to impress or please.

She knows she can show up exactly as she is, calm, tired, distracted, and still be loved.

She knows she doesn’t owe anyone physical affection to prove how she feels.

And that’s the kind of love I want her to grow up knowing, one built on safety, trust, and choice.

I’m raising a girl who knows what she wants, who listens to her needs, and who won’t let an adult’s feelings decide what’s right for her.

That’s not distance. That’s strength.

Are you the mum who’s redefining what love and respect look like for your child?

DM me to join the movement raising children who feel safe, confident, and in charge of their own bodies.

05/11/2025

This morning, the sun was already hot when we stepped outside, and I could see the resistance on his face before I even opened the bottle of sunblock.

He said, “No!”
And I get it , it’s his body.

But it’s also my job to keep him safe.

These are the moments that test us as parents, the moments where safety and autonomy collide.

I know so many parents feel that same pull:
“Am I overstepping?”
“Am I teaching him that his no doesn’t matter?”

What I’ve learned is that how we handle these moments matters most.

By explaining, involving, and staying calm, we show our children that their voice still matters, even when we must step in for safety.

If you’d like to handle these moments, like sunscreen refusals, seatbelts, or handwashing battles, with more confidence and ease, DM me. I can flick through some info on my Signature Programme so you can make body safety feel natural and normal in your child’s early years.

31/10/2025

As a child psychologist, I’ve heard too many stories that begin with,
“I thought it was just a normal playdate…”
A day meant for friendship and fun can sometimes be the moment a parent realizes how quickly “safe” situations can turn uneasy.

When another adult crosses a line, offers something that feels off, or makes a child uncomfortable, it’s not just a “stranger danger” story.
It’s a moment that tests everything we’ve taught our children about trust, instincts, and boundaries.

And when our children do the brave thing, say “no,” walk away, and tell us what happened, our response matters more than ever.

It’s in these quiet, trembling moments that they learn:
~ “I can trust my feelings.”
~ “I can tell my parent anything.”
~ “It’s not my fault.”

Body safety education isn’t about living in fear. It’s about giving our children the language, knowledge, and courage to face the world even when we’re not beside them.

If you want to feel more confident about your child’s next playdate or sleepover, my Playdates & Sleepovers Safety Checklist will help you prepare so your child has fun and stays safe.

✨ Comment or DM me CHECKLIST to get your free copy.

Address

1 Alpers Terrace
Napier
4110

Website

https://thesafekidsproject.com/

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