What are the opening hours?

Monday 7:30pm - 8:30pm Tuesday 9am - 2pm 7:30pm - 8:30pm Wednesday 9am - 1pm Thursday 9am - 2:30pm Saturday 10:30am - 11:30am

Lana Jago Coaching

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Lana Jago Coaching

Break patterns. Build real connection
🌈 Queer 🔮 Witchy ⛓️ Kinky
ENM-friendly Relationship Coach

16/12/2025

Summer availability!

I'm closed now until early Jan, BUT...keep an eye out for the last episode of Swipe, Reflect, Repeat for the year! Coming out next Tuesday (23 Dec) 🎉

12/12/2025

Festive season gifts for you!

Check out episode 2 of Swipe, Reflect, Repeat on Spotify or YouTube 🎙️

And hit me up if you want to come along to a free online Q&A session in January! Sunday 11th at 2pm. These are always a good time, and we've had some awesome kōrero this year 🗣️

09/12/2025

Swipe, Reflect, Repeat - episode 2 is live!

Find it at the link in my bio, or search 'Swipe, Reflect, Repeat' on Spotify or YouTube.

03/12/2025

We all know that telling someone that they shouldn’t be feeling a certain way, that they’re overreacting, or that their feelings aren’t justified, doesn’t actually change those feelings. Many of us will have had others say those very things to us - and guarantee it didn’t make those feelings go away!

Don’t gaslight. It seems pretty obvious, right?

So why then, do we do it to ourselves?

We gaslight internally SO OFTEN! “I shouldn’t feel like this”, “It’s not a big deal”, “I should be over it by now”, “I’m overreacting”, “I should be able to manage”, “I shouldn’t be tired”, etc, etc. What we may be able to be present for in others, we’re quick to suppress, judge, or deny in ourselves.

But when we actually learn to be present for EVERYTHING that we’re feeling, we can start to give ourselves what we actually need. Instead of pushing through or pretending, we can honour the feelings, the fears, and exactly where we’re at. This, in turn, means we get the presence, care, and connection we yearn for - and that enables us to navigate whatever’s going on for us in a healthy way.

Start to notice that inner voice that tells you you shouldn’t be feeling something, and try allowing the feelings to exist instead.

02/12/2025

I used to think I was good at boundaries.

I could articulate my needs. I was clear on what didn’t feel okay. I even thought I was ‘doing the work’ when I said, “This is what I need from you.”

But here’s what I realised (eventually)...

If you're not ready to ACT when a boundary isn’t honoured, then it’s not actually a boundary. It’s a request.

You see, boundaries live in our CHOICES - not just our voices. We speak with our actions. No matter what we tell people - what we say is, or isn’t, ok for us - the things that we accept will ALWAYS speak louder.

It’s not about making threats; or being cold, punitive, or manipulative. It’s about being clear - with others and ourselves - on what we’ll tolerate…and what we won’t. And then being willing to take action if those boundaries aren’t honoured.

Repeatedly asking for something to change is exhausting. When we’re clear on our boundaries, we can stop pouring energy into begging for things to be different, and redirect it into nurturing ourselves and our HEALTHY connections.

Boundaries don’t just protect us - they make space for relationships where safety, truth, and desire can coexist.

28/11/2025

Let's talk about ghosting 👻

Or really, any behaviour that you don't want to be a feature in your connections.

Know that we speak with our actions.

No matter what you tell them - what you say is, or isn't, ok for you - the things that you accept will ALWAYS speak louder.

If they ghost you, and you give them another chance, you're telling them it's ok...and they'll likely do it again.

27/11/2025

Good relationships aren’t based on need.

None of this “I need you in my life”, “you complete me”, “I can’t live without you”. That’s co-dependency masquerading as love.

When we connect with people from a place of need, we set ourselves up for an unhealthy reliance on them. If we need someone else to make us feel good enough, worthy, attractive, wanted, strong, secure, needed, protected - or whatever else it is that we’re looking for - then when we don’t get that, things tend to spiral.

Perhaps resentment builds, fears start directing our behaviour, and conflict arises. The difficulty being that much of the time the thing we’re seeking from the other is not voiced - and frequently, not even conscious to us. So we don’t even really know what we’re fighting about. And even if we do know what it is that we’re seeking, and are able to ask for it, we still remain in that cycle of co-dependency. That place of “I need X from you, in order to feel Y”.

Maybe the connection comes to an end, and we feel lost without it - either quickly looking for someone else to fill that space, or falling to a place of unworthiness and hopelessness. Neither of which addresses what’s at the heart of the issue. We still contend with the unhealed wound within, now exacerbated by this most recent loss.

So what to do? Completely isolate ourselves from others? Develop a hyper-independence so we never seek support from anyone?

No!

You can build strong, healthy, fulfilling relationships, without needing them to feel good about yourself.

It starts within you. With the relationship you have with yourself.

It means facing the hard stuff, the places of pain, the countless ways we’ve told ourselves we’re not enough. It means bringing our unconscious fears into awareness - and learning to parent the hurt child within us. It means truly committing to you, first and foremost.

I’m not gonna lie, it’s way more fun to bandaid the wounds with a bit more NRE - at least in the short term!

But in the end, the work is worth it. Because when you connect with people from a foundation of security within yourself, those connections aren’t even in the same realm as the ones you’ve experienced before.

25/11/2025

Swipe, Reflect, Repeat is live!

The podcast where dating disasters meet deep dives.

You'll find us on Spotify and YouTube, or check out the comments for links ⬇️

17/11/2025

Coming soon: Swipe, Reflect, Repeat!

The podcast where dating disasters meet deep self-awareness...eventually 😅

Episode 1 launching next Tuesday (25 November). Find us on YouTube 🎉

14/11/2025

Are you giving in the hope of receiving something in return?

Not necessarily something tangible, but still something. And probably something you're not even conscious of.

Over-giving, rescuing, people-pleasing, are often (underneath it all) about feeling seem, needed, chosen, wanted, validated or worthy.

If this is going on, or if you're giving at the expense of your self, then something has to change.

12/11/2025

"Rejection" doesn't hit so hard, if you're not first rejecting yourself 😅

Learn to choose yourself, before seeking out another to choose you.

Not sure how? That's where I can help 💜

05/11/2025

Reflecting on the idea of non-attachment the other day, I realised that, more often than not, what stops me from being unattached to an outcome is the fear of what it NOT happening will mean - rather than because I desperately desire that particular outcome.

It's a fear of the unknown alternative.

Which sits directly in conflict with my deep trust that I am always being guided to that which is most right for me.

So now that I've recognised it, when I find myself back in that place of fear-driven attachment to something, I can remind myself that if it's not that, then it'll be something MORE ALIGNED for me. Not necessarily easier, not necessarily "better" (in the way we tend to think of better) - but always what's needed and right for what I'm here to do and experience.

And THAT is an alternative I can get on board with ✨

Address

Otaki Beach
5512

Opening Hours

Monday	7:30pm - 8:30pm
Tuesday	9am - 2pm
	7:30pm - 8:30pm
Wednesday	9am - 1pm
Thursday	9am - 2:30pm
Saturday	10:30am - 11:30am

Telephone

+6421775424

Website

http://www.lanajago.com/, https://linktr.ee/lanajago

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