23/03/2026
Eeeww yuck !!
Your mums a le***an
I heard those words yelling at me from a car window as they drive past.
I shrunk and froze
Stuck in time (and at the same time couldnât get out of there fast enough) - I remember those words hitting me like daggers in my back.
And in that moment....... I made it mean something about me.
I made it mean:
Thereâs something wrong with me.
Iâm yuck.
Iâm gross.
Iâm disgusting.
I was 7 years old, walking home from the shop by myself, and those words changed my life.
Because in that moment... I decided it wasnât safe to be seen.
I decided that if I shrunk down, played small, stayed quiet, and didnât stand out, then maybe no one would notice me.
And if no one noticed me, no one could judge me.
No one could shame me.
No one could hurt me.
So I learned to hide.
BecauseâŚ. hiding felt safer than being exposed.
And that is how a wound is created.
A moment happens.
A meaning gets attached.
A belief is formed.
And without even realizing it, that belief starts shaping your whole life.
For years, I lived on high alert.
Any time I walked into a room, I would scan the whole place.
Who is here?
Who do I know?
Am I safe?
Is there any chance Iâll be judged, laughed at, yelled at, or shamed?
Growing up in a small town, that wasnât easy.
You couldnât really avoid people that know you.
I remember being scared to walk alone.
Scared of being seen.
Scared of being exposed.
Because thatâs exactly what it felt like every time I left the house:
*EXPOSED*
I became the shy girl.
The one who stayed small.
The one who blended in.
The one who hoped nobody would notice her.
My friends would speak up for me and tell people to shut up when they teased me.
But underneath all of that, was a DEEP fear of shame.
And when shame lives in your system, blending in can feel safer than being fully yourself.
The truth is, everyone has their own version of this.
Everyone has their own story, their own moment, their own wound around being seen.
And when you choose to put yourself out there â in business, in relationships, in leadership, in life â those wounds rise to the surface fast.
Because visibility has a way of activating the parts of you that once learned it wasnât safe.
That has been a huge part of my own healing journey.
Because beneath the patterns, beneath the behaviours, beneath the self-protection, there is often a younger part of you still trying to keep you safe.
A younger version of you that still doesnât feel safe enough to take up space.
To be seen.
To be expressed.
To use her voice.
To be fully met in who she is.
This is why I care so deeply about this work.
Because healing is not just about changing a behaviour on the surface.
Itâs about going to the root.
Itâs about meeting the part of you that made a survival decision years ago and helping her feel safe enough to choose differently now.
This is the work I do with women 1:1 through parts work, deep inner healing, and Root Cause Therapy.
We donât just talk about the pattern.
We go to the wound underneath it.
We meet the younger you with truth, safety, compassion, and repair.
We heal the wound.
So the wound no longer runs your life.
So being seen no longer feels dangerous.
So you no longer have to shrink, hide, or abandon yourself to stay safe.
So you can become who you really are.
If being seen feels unsafe for youâŚ
If visibility, relationships, money, or life keep touching the same tender placeâŚ
This is where we begin.
Message me HEALING or 1:1 if you want to explore working together.
OR explore my website for more info on my offerings
https://www.beyondloved.co.nz/