Vicky Evans - Life Mastery Coach, Create a Life You'd Love, 121 Tauhinu Road, Miramar, Wellington (2025)

26/09/2025

Self doubt can be a GOOD SIGNAL. There’s traditional self doubt. And there’s the signalling kind that it pays to take notice of.

We tend to think self doubt only creeps in when we are on the way up the ladder. Believe me that’s so not the case.

I talk to leaders in very well established, senior roles who deal with their inner critic and self doubt on the regular. And you probably wouldn’t know it if you met them.

Sometimes this is the regular kind, and classic impostor syndrome. Feeling we’re not quite up to the role or others expectations. (At least you’re in good company with 70% of high performing professionals who share this tendency).

Sometimes - abd this is the good kind, our self doubt signalling we need a life change.

I know this through lived experience in the corpoate world. As well as the work I do now in Leadership coaching. This picture is me in my mid forties after reinventing and rediscovering myself, at my core: it was life a real life GLOW UP ✨

Some of you may find my story relatable; you’re in your dream role, the one your worked so hard and long for. But finding that the reality isn’t quite the same as you dreamed it would be.

Leading to the classic burnout trail: we prioritise work over our own mental health and relationships (with ourselves as well as others) it’s become a hard habit to break.

Reconnecting with what really mattered to me was the first step. Reinventing myself and starting my leadership and workshops business was the next step on my chosen path. And you can see my children are a big part of that!

Almost ten years later, I now help high performing leaders and professionals to refine their life and career path. Especially when it’s out of balance.

Sometimes all this means is reconnecting with ourselves so that we can advocate for:

Our own needs.

And set appropriate boundaries in all aspects of life.

If you’re looking for a sign this may be it! Connect with me privately to ask a question or request a free intro strategy meeting: vickyevans.com

23/09/2025

⁉️Should I stay or leave my job? Boredom (or stagnation) at work. It’s a killer. But the job market right now, is pretty brutal.

So many coaching conversations on this topic with people in all stages of their careers.

Career boredom (over lengthy periods) saps our life force and motivation. But fear often stops us from moving roles during economic tough times.

The same could also be said for our personal relationships or marriages. Should I stay or should I go?

So how can we reimagine this?

My advice on staying or leaving a job? Choose your hard.

1️⃣ If your appetite for risk is low, put up with the boredom and ask for more challenges in your current role.

2️⃣ If you’re a go getter (whose go almost got up and left), follow the signals.

3️⃣ What does your ❤️ and your head say?

💪🏻Sometimes it’s time to take the leap.

There are roles out there. There are success stories happening with the folks I’m working with right now.

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Here’s a recent win for one of my longstanding Leadership and life coaching clients. We’ve worked together over five years and many career changes:

She just moved away from a static government role to a high performing leadership role in a progressive not for profit.

We talked a lot about the practicalities plus pros and cons of moving. And impact on family budget and perhaps equally important, her overall well-being. Her pazzaz!

It takes courage, vision and wisdom to follow a path that calls to you. She’s so stoked she did!!

If you’d love someone on your side to help you find, or follow a new path, let’s talk.

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Experienced, (50s) certified leadership and life coach and workshop facilitator. With a ton of personal experience and some battle scars!

19/09/2025

Challenges reimagined: parenting teens!

Anyone parenting TEENS experienced this? The BIG THAW, when your young people starts responding to you more warmly and you feel they appreciate you and their blessings again?

I was told during the hard years (of being ignored, shut out, scowled at and eye rolled) that “they come back”. After however long it takes them to feel more independant and in control.

Well the good news to anyone hanging in there, is that this turns out that’s true! Eventually!

My learnings on parenting teens so far (def ongoing) I’ve made it about me not them and reimagined my responses:

1. Learn to self regulate: no matter what they do or don’t do. Practice patience (freakin hard but worth mastering as we need an endless supply).

2. Lead by example: Always treat them with kindness and respect (as that’s what you want to model).

3. Be firm but fair when you need to. And don’t let anyone, even your child, treat you like you or your feelings don’t matter.

The big teen thaw has brought colour to my cheeks and my bestie just told me a look younger!!

If you’re doing the hard yards, hang in there!! Feel free to share your teen parenting tips I’d love to hear your wisdom!!

16/09/2025

I almost didn’t become a Mum. I thought I’d missed the boat.⛵️

Focussing on my career and putting that above all else (including sometimes my mental health) was my strategy. Which served well financially but not so much in my personal fulfilment.

🧘🏻‍♀️I realised that there might be more to life than that during a meditation segment in a residential leadership retreat.

We were asked to visualise what we enjoyed doing most, what made us feel most whole and fulfilled. My mind went to coaching and development. Nurturing my people and helping them be better than they believed they could be.

☄️Then a moment, more like a comet hit me. What if I could have my own little people? To nurture and help be the best they could be? My life changed in that instant. Becoming a Mum became my overriding priority.

I was 39. Happily in a stable relationship and with someone who wanted to have more children.

Taking this step was huge for me. Giving up the security of my own income, leaving my team and my social support in my role. Being ten years older than most people having babies (technically termed as a geriatric mother) weighted on me a bit. So many aspects that no one really talks about.

Despite the challenges of having two babies by the time I was 42, and two rounds of post natal depression, I can report that choosing motherhood (and career) was the best decision I have ever made in my life.

The ‘more to life than this’ was primarily solved by starting a family. Then by starting my business in a way that I could best look after them. And my clients. Almost ten years in, my most common clients are working women between 35-55.

So this topic comes up in coaching sessions. Both with peoole who can - and sometimes cannot have children for whatever reason. I see you.

⛵️If you’re wondering if you’ve missed the boat, or if having a family or career and family could work for you, let’s talk. I’ve got the t shirt!

12/09/2025

Will booking a life coach change me?

Not fundamentally. But it can (*with investment of your time, courage, action, self reflection and consistency) enhance your life. And lifestyle.

It can refine the:
Behaviours
Beliefs
Habits… that aren’t your favourite part of you.

It can help you rediscover yourself at a different stage of life.

It can help you recognise your innate strengths and talents.

And it can help you be kinder to yourself and feel more confident.

Just like a lint remover refreshes and gives your clothes a new lease of life, a life coach can often do the same.

Do you love this analogy or does it suck?! 🫣😂

I’d love to hear your thoughts, whether you’re considering booking a life coach or you have and have noticed changes in your life. ⬇️

If you’re curious to learn more or ask a question, book a free 30 minute strategy session here: https://vickyevans.com

09/09/2025

⬆️ CHALLENGES REIMAGINED:
Managing my boss!

Our challenges can stem from our beliefs about what we can and can’t (or should or shouldn’t do).

Here’s some examples that come up frequently:

Bosses who:
Are absent, do not provide support or encouragement.

Who give instructions without taking the time to explain why it’s important.

Who can’t let go of control, so micro manage and don’t allow growth from their teams.

Managing up, or challenging your boss can feel confronting.

It can provoke:

1. Anxiety that we will be penalised for pushing back or a lack of clarity.

2. Fear that in today’s market, if we rock the boat we may even lose our jobs.

3. The assumption that our boss is already too busy and a request for help will be irritating.

None of which we want. How can we reimagine or reframe this challenge?

Here’s what has worked for my clients:

Bosses are time poor. Treat the discussion like going to the bank with a business case:

1. Get very clear about what you need. E.g. I booked today’s meeting with you because… I need clarity/support/feedback/resources.

2. Explain the context for your request and why it matters. E.g; I’d love more responsibility and autonomy in my role. I know you like to run a tight ship.

3. State exactly what you need as an ideal outcome politely and respectfully. E.g: Budget sign off sitting with you can hold us up. If my limit was increased to X I could reduce your workload and help us be more efficient. What would you need from me to make this comfortable for you?

Preparation:
Go into your meeting with notes. This helps if you feel awkward or anxious. Include stats if you may be asked for proof.

Rehearse the conversation (with yourself) or with a friend, and plan your responses to any objections.

Helping my clients to have the confidence to nail hard conversations is one of the reasons I am in business. Having someone to walk alongside you can change your view of what achieve. Are you that boss? Or do you have that boss?

✨✨✨

If you’re curious email vicky@vickyevans.com.

05/09/2025

My ‘back to work’ after babies experience started with being made redundant on maternity leave.

Tough at the time, but ultimately was one of the drivers behind emigrating to NZ and bringing up my children (then 2 under 2 at 42) here.

It was also a factor in getting in deep on what and who I wanted to be, when I did return to work.

I’d always wanted to run my own business. To have more freedom. And autonomy. But honestly, I was really scared of failing (especially publicly) and didn’t have a tons of confidence in my abilities to make it happen!

If this is something you are experiencing or considering right now, this is what I did:

☀️ I honed right in on what felt most satesfying in my previous corporate life. It wasn’t the money or the title or the healthcare package, it was helping my people do more than they thought they could. So the people develoment side of being a manager.

🤹🏻‍♀️Then I looked at my life, and what I needed to juggle. I designed a life that worked with two very young children, as I wanted to play an active role in their lives. Having children at 40 and 42 can do that! 😆

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
I can report to anyone considering such a bold life move that I do not regret one second if it. Despite many hard times, a divorce, and the finacial uncertainty that we are all experiencing over the years. Not to mention the hike in the rates!

📲 If you’d love some support to work out where you are right now, and the best life options for you, let’s talk. Pm me privately for a free 30 minute strategy session. I’d love to help you feel this good everyday.

✨✨✨

Experienced double certified leadership and life coach, I can help you to find clarity, direction and confidence. And to feel like you’ve earned the value you offer.

02/09/2025

⁉️What’s next? Have you asked yourself recently what you’d love? For yourself and the people in your life?

We don’t often think of what we’d love. We are often taught to focus on what is realistic or what our past has shown us.

☀️Helping my clients find their clarity, confidence and direction is my life’s work.

If you’re seeking transformation, this is for you. My most popular 12 week transformational life coaching course is designed to:

1️⃣ Help us master what we would love to create.

2️⃣ And then, provide help with the skills (to get over our inner imposter) and help us live it!

Content is both online and in person. Each weekly training includes short podcast episodes and self study workbooks.

These strategies help walk you through the steps to design a life you’d love. Easily. At your own pace.

You also get a one hour in person or online meeting with me every week to work through the content and refine your Dream.

Life changing content includes:

✨Learning to be kinder to ourselves to tranform self esteem.

✨Identifying and managing limiting beliefs to transform confidence.

✨Training our minds to be more patient, find forgiveness and look forwards - not back. To find direction and the courage to gain Momentumn.

🤩 My most recent client is nine weeks in and has transformed her relationship with herself. She is managing her anxiety (which was crippling) and has found confidence in who she is. And WHAT SHE WANTS, NEEDS and LOVES for her life.

☺️ Seeing my clients transform in this way is why I do what I do.
Every time I see someone’s opinion, beliefs and expectations of themselves change positively it gives me such a lift!! ☀️

⏳If you or someone you know needs a life change, and is seeking more clarity, confidence, and direction, let’s talk. Message me privately to book a no obligation strategy session.

29/08/2025

How to ! My latest blog draws from my experience of single parenting following a divorce, whilst running a small business. And the hidden (and surprising) benefits.

Learning to like being by yourself:
As a single, fifty ‘something’, it’s a bloody good job that I like my own company! Week-on-week-off child care took a long time to adjust to after my divorce in 2018.

Being by yourself isn’t always easy. Especially if you’re processing events. Or maybe trying to work out who you are in the now.

Challenge yourself: But there’s great beauty and value in challenging yourself to do just that. Sit with your feelings. Process. Potter and ponder, and actually really work out who you want to be in the now. Or trying to remember who you are! Or could be!

Time out: Because of my profession, I spend many (highly productive and fulfilling) hours creating meaningful interactions providing leadership and life coaching. It can sometimes be intense as well as rewarding. Because of this I need to guard against spending all my time with others. I have to prioritize my walks in nature, and protect them fiercely as that’s how I decompress.

This means I can always give my best as a leadership coach or workshop facilitator. Creating time for meaningful connections really does enhance your life. Especially when those meaningful connections are with yourself.

Practice till you get good at it! Like any skill, it’s not a quick fix. It took me years to move from anxiety to comfort. I can now say I enjoy my own time as much as time with others. It makes interactions more special. Especially with my now teenagers.

Learning to like yourself: Being who you are on a deeper, more profound level. Learning to be kind and supportive to yourself. Encouraging yourself when you need to is life changing. And in my opinion, this is done best during our moments alone.

I’d love to know, what resonates most? If you’ve been through bad break up hang in there, it gets easier!

Reach out if you’d love some support and new strategies to help you rediscover your best friend (you)! (link in bio).

26/08/2025

Top challenge for my clients in August? Inner critic on the RAMPAGE!! Read on for 3️⃣ steps I use daily and share with my clients.

Inner Critic Rampages typically show up as:

1. Pushing ourselves unrealistically hard.

2. Procrastination overdrive, especially when we can’t see a clear plan.

3. Beating ourselves up when the plan isn’t happening or happening as planned. Or quickly enough!

Here’s 3️⃣ steps that I walk my clients though that get results:

👢Practice having more PATIENCE.

This isn’t always easy or intuitive (for many of us). But it is something we can learn to master better. This stops us pushing ourselves unrealistically hard, to get results fast. No one needs another burnout!

Keep in mind: Life is a long game, all in perfect time.

👞 Make a clear plan with REALISTIC milestones and deliverables.

Break your big goals down into smaller, more achievable chunks.

Use the phrase: Keep going! And take daily actions.

👟 Be KIND. If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all is a phrase I grew up with. Learning self kindness can be a long game. Especially if our inner critic has ruled for a long time!

Keep in mind: You are doing your best. You can’t do more.

Everyone has an inner COACH as well as an inner critic. A lot of these tips seem obvious, but reall mastery takes time. And can be life changing!!

I’d love to hear what resonates most with you? Or your biggest challenge not on this list and I’ll craft something for you!

✨✨✨

Experienced, double certified leadership and life coach - and recovering perfectionist!

For a personalised plan on how to manage your inner critic better, book yourself in for a free strategy session here: https://lnkd.in/gfRWSPA2

-critic -kindness

22/08/2025

A great friend once said to me, prior to an interview, “be yourself and you’ll shine”. I helped me manage my inner critic in that moment. So I’m paying this forwards to all of you!

I’m often asked this question: How can I feel more confident?

I used to ask myself the same question growing up as a shy child in a world that required me to be bolder.

A view like this one always helps!!

But it wouldn’t be a Friday post without sharing some that help folks to feel more themselves. Even in daunting situations.

1. Prepare extremely well: the more prepared you are for; an event, meeting, interview, (even a date) the better you will feel.

This could be providing a timed agenda, or ensuring you practice a presentation till it feels natural. TEDx presenters practice at least 10 times!

2. Decide how you want to show up. Using tools like To Be lists (see my previous post) and daily specific intentions can help create a sense of quiet confidence.

Feeling like you’re prepared and ready, come what may.

Eg: a client this week who is interviewing again (having been turned down). Her to be list might include: showing up authentically with some ideas & proposals for the company. A specific intention might be, ensuring she evaluates the company and fit. Not just whether they offer something. So in short, don’t panic buy. This can help us feel more powerful in an uncertain situations.

3. Actively review & refine to adjust to do it better next time!

This may relate to how you spoke up (or wanted to) at a meeting or even managing the small talk before it (can feel tricky). Or further refining & practicing your interview technique & examples of prior work.

Feeling more self assured & confident can feel like a game changer. Sometimes we need to practice to get good at encouraging & supporting ourselves.

Sharing this magnificent view with you to help lift your spirits. Can’t beat Welly on a good day. ☀️☀️☀️

Wishing you the confidence to shine!

19/08/2025

Do you have a To BE LIST for today?

To do lists help us stay focussed and on task, we work down our list of priorities.

A daily or weekly TO BE list is something I added to my personal planning, following my leadership coach certification.

This is how that sounds:

Today I want to achieve, (inset priority) AND I want to show up in this way (insert HOW you’d like to interact, negotiate or feel inside today).

Here’s recent example which came from a client facing a potentially challenging annual appraisal and salary review conversation with an intimidating boss.

We looked at both the outcome they were seeking, and how they wanted to be seen - and the impression they needed to make too.

To do: Complete APR meeting and negotiate for (a minimum of) pay parity raise (and not agree to more work for the same pay cheque).

To BE: 20/8/25

1. Brave: honest with my yes and no’s. Ready to provide sound rationale for my answers.

2. Real: tuned in to my inner signals. Ready to speak up for myself and know my own worth.

3. Curious: to ask good questions rather than assume. Pushing back politely and respectful when I need more information or time to make a decision.

😁 Taking a proactive approach and preparing really well before any meeting or conversation, however daunting, can really change the outcome.

☀️ Follow me for more tips on confidence, career change and leadership advice.

Vicky Evans - Life Mastery Coach, Create a Life You'd Love

26/09/2025

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19/09/2025

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12/09/2025

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