Jodie Menish

22/05/2026

I think one of the most encouraging things about the Gottmans’ research is that healthy relationships are not just based on luck or “chemistry.”

There are actually observable patterns that help relationships stay connected and resilient over time.

The “magic ratio” is one of them.

Healthy couples tend to maintain significantly more positive interactions than negative ones during conflict. Not because they never struggle, but because they continue creating moments of connection even while navigating hard conversations.

And once you understand that, you can begin intentionally practicing it.

Softening your tone.
Expressing appreciation more often.
Turning toward your partner instead of away.
Making repair attempts.
Staying curious during conflict.
Creating more moments of warmth, humor, affection, and emotional safety.

Small interactions shape the emotional climate of a relationship over time.

The good news is that these are patterns couples can learn, strengthen, and rebuild together.

 

Keyword block: Couples therapy, individual therapy, couples therapist, couples, therapy, marriage counseling, marriage therapy, Brainspotting therapy, Gottman Method, relationship counseling, couples counseling, relationship support, Alaska therapist, in-person therapy Alaska, virtual therapy, online therapy, Idaho therapist, Washington therapist, Oregon therapist

Disclaimer: This content is intended for educational and informational purposes only and should not be considered a substitute for counseling. If you are a current or former client of Crossings Health, please know that following or engaging with this account may affect your confidentiality or anonymity.

20/05/2026

A lot of people assume healthy relationships are the ones without conflict.

But decades of relationship research actually suggest something very different.

Healthy couples still argue. They still get frustrated, misunderstand each other, and go through hard seasons. The difference is often in how they move through conflict together.

The Gottmans found that stable couples maintained significantly more positive interactions than negative ones during conflict conversations. Things like humor, affection, validation, curiosity, repair attempts, and emotional responsiveness helped keep the relationship connected even while navigating disagreement.

Conflict itself is not usually the biggest threat to a relationship.

Disconnection is.

And often, healing begins in the small moments where couples start turning back toward each other again. 

 

Keyword block: Couples therapy, individual therapy, couples therapist, couples, therapy, marriage counseling, marriage therapy, Brainspotting therapy, Gottman Method, relationship counseling, couples counseling, relationship support, Alaska therapist, in-person therapy Alaska, virtual therapy, online therapy, Idaho therapist, Washington therapist, Oregon therapist

Disclaimer: This content is intended for educational and informational purposes only and should not be considered a substitute for counseling. If you are a current or former client of Crossings Health, please know that following or engaging with this account may affect your confidentiality or anonymity.

15/05/2026

The good news is that relationship patterns are not permanent.

With awareness, support, and intentional repair, couples can begin shifting the ways they communicate, move through conflict, and reconnect emotionally.

Healing in a relationship doesn’t mean never struggling. It means learning how to stay connected to each other through the hard moments instead of losing each other inside of them.

If you’ve found yourselves stuck in cycles of criticism, defensiveness, resentment, or disconnection, change is possible. Moving from negative sentiment override toward greater trust, safety, and positive connection takes work, but it can absolutely happen.

If you’re ready to begin that work, you can reach out for a free discovery call through the link in my bio.

 

Keyword block
Couples therapy, individual therapy, couples therapist, couples, therapy, marriage counseling, marriage therapy, Brainspotting therapy, Gottman Method, relationship counseling, couples counseling, relationship support, Alaska therapist, in-person therapy Alaska, virtual therapy, online therapy, Idaho therapist, Washington therapist, Oregon therapist

Disclaimer: This content is intended for educational and informational purposes only and should not be considered a substitute for counseling. If you are a current or former client of Crossings Health, please know that following or engaging with this account may affect your confidentiality or anonymity.

11/05/2026

It is not really about the trash not getting taken out, the text not being answered, or the errand that was forgotten.

It is not really about the trash not getting taken out, the text not being answered, or the errand that was forgotten.

It is about the meaning that moment starts to hold emotionally.

Because when relationships feel connected and secure, it is easier to think:
“They probably forgot.”
“They have a lot on their mind.”
“We are both stretched thin right now.”

But when there has been hurt, stress, resentment, or disconnection building over time, now the thought becomes:

“I do not feel important.”
“They are not considering me.”
“I cannot rely on them.”

This is why emotional connection matters so much in relationships. It shapes the lens we interpret each other through every day.

The next time something like this comes up, try to pause and notice the automatic thought that appears first.

Then gently ask yourself:
Is this actually true?
Or is my nervous system filling in the gaps with a story?

That does not mean your feelings are wrong. But sometimes when couples get stuck in negative sentiment override, the relationship starts filtering everything through hurt, disappointment, or protection.

If you are noticing this pattern showing up in your relationship, couples therapy can help you begin rebuilding connection, understanding, and emotional safety together. Reach out to schedule a free discovery call.



Keyword block
Couples therapy, individual therapy, couples therapist, couples, therapy, marriage counseling, marriage therapy, Brainspotting therapy, Gottman Method, relationship counseling, couples counseling, relationship support, Alaska therapist, in-person therapy Alaska, virtual therapy, online therapy, Idaho therapist, Washington therapist, Oregon therapist

Disclaimer: This content is intended for educational and informational purposes only and should not be considered a substitute for counseling. If you are a current or former client of Crossings Health, please know that following or engaging with this account may affect your confidentiality or anonymity.

06/05/2026

If you’re a Brainspotting practitioner and want to feel more confident working with couples and relationships you won't want to miss this!

On May 11, I’ll be a guest therapist, speaking on this inside a FREE Peer Brainspotting Consultation Group hosted by Clear Roots Counseling.

We’ll be exploring how this work shows up in real relationship dynamics and how to support clients in a deeper, more attuned way.

May 11 | 10am CST

If you’d like to join, please email Melissa Pasquinelli at mpasquinelli@clearrootscounseling.com.

05/05/2026

I’m excited to be joining this conversation and diving into couples, relationships, and Brainspotting.

We are a week away from our next FREE Peer Brainspotting group! The group will meet on May 11, 2026 at 10am CST.

Jodie Menish, LCSW will be joining us to discuss Couples & Relationships with Brainspotting.

If you are new to our group and would like to join, please email Melissa Pasquinelli at mpasquinelli@clearrootscounseling.com.