24/03/2025
Have you ever found yourself helping your child before they even ask for help?
Maybe it’s climbing up on a swing, fixing a block , or guiding their hands to complete a task—even when you know they can do it.
Over the past week, I’ve had conversations with many parents—each with incredible children diagnosed with autism.
And in every case, I noticed something surprising:
Parents were doing most of the work.
Not because their kids couldn’t do it.
But because, without realizing it, they weren’t giving them the space to try.
*The hidden cycle of anxiety and over-prompting!!*
Before a child starts, we prompt.
Before they can finish, we give the next instruction.
Before they struggle, we help.
And in doing so, we unintentionally take away their chance to self-initiate.
I also noticed thst while their child was working on one task, parents were already thinking about the next.
Their minds were constantly racing:
What’s after this?
What if he doesn’t finish?
But when we’re not present in the moment, we end up doing things for our child instead of with them.
The power of waiting and Pausing:-
Instead of jumping in with physical prompting, let’s follow a prompt hierarchy—starting with the least intrusive method first:
* Verbal Prompt – Give the instruction clearly. Then… PAUSE for 20 seconds.
* Gestural Prompt – Point to the object or model the action. Then PAUSE again.
* Physical Prompt* – Only if needed, use minimal assistance.
I know 20 seconds feels like forever.
But this pause allows your child to process the instruction at their own pace rather than just reacting to to constant prompts.
What if my child still does not respond?
If you’ve waited and your child still isn’t initiating, step back and ask:
_Is the task too hard?
_Does my child understand?
_Is my child motivated?
The purpose of sharing this is to help bring mindfulness back into those everyday moments—to create awareness in the way you talk, instruct, and teach your child. Because in that awareness, the real transformation happens.
