CALM - Counselling And Family Life Mediation Services

13/10/2025

A little help goes a long way

12/10/2024

14/06/2024

SIGNS OF INSECURITIES IN A RELATIONSHIP
YOU’RE JEALOUS
This is one of the most obvious signs of relationship insecurity. A jealous partner constantly questions their significant other’s true intentions. They spy, become clingy or control your friendships and free time. Jealousy is all-consuming and damaging to every relationship.
YOU SEEK ATTENTION
Some attention-seeking behaviors are similar to jealousy, like the need for constant reassurance. Others are about a fear of being alone, like always having to do everything together. Still, others fulfill a need for significance by causing drama or picking fights.
YOU ARGUE CONSTANTLY
Every couple argues – the difference is between healthy and unhealthy arguing. Healthy arguing uses productive communication tactics to reach a place of understanding and agreement. Unhealthy arguing stems from a lack of trust, unresolved insecurities, and even fear that true communication will cause your partner to leave you.
YOU WORRY
Insecurities in a relationship don’t always manifest outwardly. Many insecure people keep their feelings bottled up – while deep down inside, they’re constantly worrying that their partner is cheating on them, lying to them, or will break up with them at any moment. If this sounds like you, it’s time to ask yourself how to deal with insecurities in a relationship.
YOU’VE NOTICED NEGATIVE EFFECTS
Feeling insecure in a relationship doesn’t just affect you. It affects your partner and your overall relationship. Unhealthy arguments lead to complete communication breakdowns that don’t achieve a productive outcome. Insecurity also creates an imbalance in which you are the only one getting your needs met, leading to resentment and anger. It can destroy your relationship entirely.
CAUSES OF RELATIONSHIP INSECURITY
It’s tempting to blame feelings of insecurity on outside forces. Maybe you’ve been rejected one too many times. Or your partner really did cheat on you or treat you poorly in the past. Perhaps insecurity in your family relationships has led to a fear of abandonment. These experiences do shape your beliefs, but ultimately, you are in charge of your own emotions – and relationship insecurity is an emotion.
The real root of insecurity is a lack of confidence. We may project an image of confidence, but inside, we feel inadequate and undeserving. And then we sabotage ourselves and our relationships. It becomes a negative pattern that we can’t seem to break – but we can.

In need of our services contact 1 868 864-6099, calmfamilylifeservices@gmail.com

Services we provide:
- Child and Adolescent Counseling
- Art Therapy for Childhood Trauma
- Family Life Education
- Mediation
- Life Coaching
- Grief Counselling
- Marriage Therapy
-Relationship Enrichment
-S*x and S*xuality Therapy

21/10/2023

Help After Infidelity
Finding out about a partner's infidelity can be devastating. It's normal to experience strong or perplexing feelings. Some decide to discuss these emotions with a therapist. An individual afflicted by adultery may benefit from individual therapy. Counselling could clarify how someone reacted to their partner's extramarital affair. It might emphasise moving on, letting go, or forgiving. The emotions that follow adultery can be dealt with in a variety of ways. A counsellor can assist you in considering your alternatives. You may choose to end your relationship with your partner or make amends.
Counselling is beneficial for partners who have experienced adultery. The requirements of both partners can be met with the aid of couples therapy. A couple may decide to keep their union intact. They could strengthen their friendship through therapy. Infidelity can also be the reason for a couple's decision to split up. Maybe they'll go to therapy to have a more amicable split.
Infidelity-affected couples may seek discernment counselling. The relationship is on the table in this kind of therapy. It is up to both parties to determine if they wish to continue dating. When they start discernment counselling, partners frequently have divergent preferences. They can reach a consensus with the therapist's assistance. They will support each partner in accepting the ultimate choice.
THE PROCESS OF RECOVERY
An affair might take a long time to recover from. It could take a long time for couples who want to get back together. It's impossible to predict whether or not a couple will move on from an affair. It is hard to predict how long a recovery will take. However, specialists concur that healing frequently happens in two years. It could take longer for some couples to heal. Some people can reconcile sooner than others. Once more, there's no set schedule for healing. The way a couple reacts when the affair is revealed may determine how quickly they recover.
The healing process may also be impacted by other variables. These consist of:
• Ability to communicate effectively; • Conflict tolerance; • Honesty capacity

• Taking personal accountability
• Style of attachment
Every partnership is distinct. Recovering from infidelity also takes different paths. Usually, recovery goes through the following stages:

When a partner learns of the affair, they could experience stress or shock. They might experience rage, resentment, and hopelessness. This stage is frequently an emotional roller coaster. These can include everything from anger and annoyance to loss and grief. They may arrive with sobs or arguments. In this stage, both partners have trouble thinking coherently. Physical symptoms including hunger reduction and weight loss, are possible.
• Matters Explanation Couples start to look into what might have caused the affair during this time. There can be a significant amount of emotional instability left. However, the partners are now curious as to why the affair took place. Closure may result from this procedure. Couples may benefit from closure sooner if they can start as soon as possible. Speaking with your partner about a relationship
Think about the procedure for disclosing an affair. That method consists of numerous steps. One step is to talk about an affair. What comes next is the subject of another round of discussions. That could take some time. Usually, there are two options for the last stage. There might be a conversation about how to break up. It might also consist of a sequence of conversations centred on restoring confidence.
Knowing how to move on from an affair might be challenging. At any point during the discussion of an affair, a couples counsellor can assist a couple. Some pointers to bear in mind throughout these conversations are as follows:
Have patience. Be tolerant with your partner's reactions if you had an affair. They might experience agony as they process your affair. If you were cheated on, it can also be beneficial to exercise patience with your partner. Allow them to share their thoughts about the circumstances as well.
Be accountable. Your partner might feel angry, among other intense feelings, if you had an affair. Don't hold your lover responsible for your behaviour. Don't downplay the significance of what you do.
Offer regret and forgiveness. If a couple wants to start over in their relationship, this has to happen. The individual who had an affair needs to sincerely apologise. This apology ought to be accepted in full by the individual who was duped. There's no hurrying in this process.
In need of our service contact (868) 684-6099

Services we provide:
- Child and Adolescent Counseling
- Art Therapy for Childhood Trauma
- Family Life Education
- Mediation
- Life Coaching
- Grief Counselling
- Marriage Therapy
-Relationship Enrichment
-S*x and S*xuality Therapy

28/09/2023

Signs of Insecurity in Relationships
In romantic relationships, insecurity can drive you to unhelpful thoughts and behaviors, which can include:

Incessantly checking up on your partner if you’re not with them to determine their whereabouts
Not trusting your partner to stay faithful to you and constantly worrying that they’re cheating on you
Feeling jealous of all the other people in their life and resenting the other people they are close to
Not taking your partner at their word and wanting to verify everything they tell you
Feeling like your partner may break up with you at any time
Fishing for compliments and validation to try and feel more secure
People who have been in unhealthy relationships where their partner was untrustworthy or treated them poorly might hold onto those emotions and carry them into their new relationships.
Identify your triggers: Become more self-aware about situations that trigger your insecurity. Track topics or areas that prompt feelings of insecurity so you can begin to identify the problems you need to work on.
Communicate with your partner: Engage in more open communication about your insecurities, how they arise in your relationship, and ways you can begin to work on them.
Express how you feel: Aim to share your feelings with your partner without blaming them. For instance, instead of saying “You stress me out because...” say “I sometimes get stressed because...”
Listen to your partner: Make an effort to listen to your partner with an open mind, so you can understand their perspective as well.
Try journaling: It can be helpful to maintain a journal where you write down your thoughts when you feel insecure. The exercise can help you identify situations that trigger your insecurity. You could even undertake a couples journaling exercise, to help build trust between you and your partner.
Consider going to a therapist: While insight and open communication are essential, sometimes you need perspective from a trained outside source to fully grasp how your insecurity is linked to more complex dynamics. In turn, your therapist can work with you to cope with your insecurity.
In need of our services contact; 18686846099.

Services we provide:
- Child and Adolescent Counseling
- Art Therapy for Childhood Trauma
- Family Life Education
- Mediation
- Life Coaching
- Grief Counselling
- Marriage Therapy
-Relationship Enrichment
-S*x and S*xuality Therapy

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