Inner Most Healing Therapy Shannon Myers LMFT

05/08/2026

05/01/2026

When we’re talking about boundaries, we sometimes focus on the other person- what we will or will not tolerate in someone else’s behavior or demeanor– when in fact those are rules or limits or expectations.

A boundary is about me checking in with me to ensure that I am caring for MYSELF in my relationship with YOU.

And why do I need a process of steady check in with myself?
1. Because I get to choose me and care for me and tend to me.
2. Because our relationship is going to hit a very low ceiling of intimacy, connection, depth, and richness if I am a ticking time bomb of resentment and dysregulation.

A healthy boundary is BOTH self-protective (caring for me) AND loving (caring for you and us).

I want you to FEEL your way into your boundaries- rather than having your therapist or a social media post tell you exactly where to put them. Feel your way into your boundary by checking in with your nervous system.

- When your nervous system is regulated, you feel calm, generous, patient and present.
- When your nervous system is dysregulated, you feel anxious, crabby, distracted, and bitter.

Your boundary is the line between regulated and dysregulated.

There are things we can (and should) do to create more capacity in our nervous systems (see: therapy, mindfulness, movement, breath work, journaling, etc).

These practices are good and healing for us period. But they also help us really learn what regulation even feels like so that we are better able to notice when we’ve moved from calm into cranky. In order to feel our way into a workable and healthy boundary we have to be able to feel and attend to our internal cues. We have to get familiar with that contrast.

Here’s to boundaries that help us heal and connect.

04/28/2026

04/16/2026

https://youtu.be/YDIHSLf9qzw?si=DA8Xkyu1fOs3z7mS

This episode will change the way you show up in your love life - whether you’re in a relationship, healing from one, or hoping to find the right one. If your...

04/12/2026

Your spouse is not a mindreader. Communicate what you need, what you desire, and what you like and don’t like. Don’t assume your spouse already knows.

04/10/2026

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DW7RPd8Eb-r/?igsh=enkxeXpuazYzYWRj

04/06/2026

You've been taught that stopping means falling behind.

Your non-conscious mind doesn't agree. It processes, consolidates, and rebuilds during the hours you call wasted. That's the actual biology of how your mind works.
Somewhere the equation got flipped. Rest became something to earn. A reward for finishing enough. And since "enough" keeps moving, the rest never comes.
Every time you push through when your body is asking for recovery, the thinking gets slower and the emotional regulation gets harder. Your mind collects the debt.
The Sunday reset isn't optional. Your neurology built it in.

Share with someone who needs the reminder to rest today. 💛

03/30/2026

03/13/2026

03/08/2026

Once, during a therapy session, a wife shared that as she was vacuuming, her husband came in and threw down his work bag a few feet from her. She described how angry she got telling me he “never notices what’s going on around him.” The husband confused about the situation and hurt asked her why she always assumed the worst about him. “I feel like she thinks I’m a bad husband.”

They both looked to me as their therapist, desperate for me to decided who was right and who was wrong. What they didn’t understand is: both of them were right. It wasn’t about a vacuum. It was a wife who had spent her whole childhood performing to be seen. Who’d did all she could to be perfect, and quiet, and good. And then her husband comes in as she’s once again, doing it all— and doesn’t notice. She felt every past moment someone didn’t notice her. Her inner child was running the show, and was rightfully angry.

Her husband, who had a critical father, saw her look of disgust and the anger in his wife’s voice. To him, it was just a bag and it’s where he always placed it. He didn’t think it would disrupt her ability to vacuum. He became that 6 year old boy who felt small, and not good enough. Her tone brought him back to all of the moments he was scolded and told to be quiet. To all of the moments his father would look at him with contempt instead of love. To all of the moments where he once again, wasn’t good enough for someone.

After seeing this over and over again, I realized I was giving the tools for better communication and regulation. I was trying to help them with the present moment, but they didn’t just need help in the present. They needed to reparent themselves and each other. They needed to see the 6 year old in the person they loved, and they needed to see that 6 year old was terrified. Terrified of not being good enough. Of being left. And of not being seen.

Until there’s Reparenting, it’s two children in adult bodies fighting over wounds they didn’t create.

I’ve written the book I wish I could have given every once of my clients. It’s going to help so many of you. It comes out March 24th. Comment “BOOK” then check your DM to pre-order. Or click the link in my bio.