IPNB Psychotherapy of Austin

07/26/2023

This episode’s question hit home for the people at Why Does My Partner HQ.

They’re sharing their stories of relationships where it was hard to let go as they respond to this listener, whose partner keeps breaking up with her and getting back together...now more than seven times.

There’s some big YOU-turns to be made in this story, and at the center of it all is the question, “What would happen if you said: ‘No, I don’t want this?‘” Would there be grief that you’ve been avoiding? Fear of being alone? These answers could be "yes" for either person in this story. And it could also be that there’s a process going on here, and in that back and forth, there’s some kind of learning or repair. So, the YOU-Turn is also about realizing if that’s what’s happening, and it doesn’t feel okay for you, what’s the cost of letting it continue?

Listen to the full episode now on Spotify, Apple, or wherever you get your podcasts.

https://whydoesmypartner.com/episodes

07/25/2023

Juliane Taylor Shore has a new workshop coming up!

If you want to get closer, say the things that usually go unspoken, and trust each other (and yourself) to get through the hard moments, this is the workshop for you.

In this 2.5 day experiential online workshop, we'll help you explore what holds you stuck and to understand and experience how your wildly efficient brain moves fast to protect you when you sense danger.

The skills and tools we cover in this workshop will help you develop practices that support your capacity to spend more time in brain states that promote relational connection.

And when you put it all together, integrating these new skills and practices will help you experience more ease in your relationships, even in the sticky hard moments that can derail an evening, a week, or even an entire relationship.

Sign up now at Whydoesmypartner.com/events

07/25/2023

07/14/2023

Kim John Payne and Juliane Taylor Shore come together to discuss creating boundaries in parenting 🤝

Check out the Wise Conversations tab at therapywisdom.com to watch the entire conversation-Boundaries in Parenting: Matching the developmental shifts in your child.

07/14/2023

07/06/2023

This is the final episode of the Why Does My Partner Podcast bonus mini-series, Discord Builds Trust...No Really!

Is there one person in your partnership that always brings up the issues? Whether that’s you or your partner, chances are there are some real feelings of disconnection and loneliness all around.

In this episode, it’s all about how our attachment styles guide our gut instincts to either distance ourselves from conflict or try to smooth it over right away. They discuss what might be happening when there’s a mismatch between those two styles in a partnership, and how stepping up and learning to raise issues is an amazing way to show your partner that they’re being seen and heard.

Of course, they offer you some tips on how to get into those conversations, and even discuss what to do to help short-circuit the anger and resentment that might be building up, helping both you and your partner come together more relationally.

They hope that these episodes have inspired you to start leaning into the messy moments in your own lives, risking a little discord, and building a little trust…no, really! Thanks for listening! Season 5 on July 18th!

07/06/2023

Ok, so maybe we’ve convinced you that Discord Builds Trust (No Really!). You’re on board, you’re practicing sitting with your learned beliefs, and you're cultivating curiosity.

Now the moment arrives. There’s disconnect, hurt, something went wrong. What do you do? How do you get out of this place and into the trust (no…really!)

On episode three of our mini-series, the question is "Why does my partner want me to just get over the hurt?"

We start off flipping the question on its head and pointing out some unspoken feelings inside of that question, which takes us into picking apart the difference between toxic shame and remorse.

Finally, we share some strategies for getting out of that shame pit and into a more relational space, ready for repair.

Listen now on Spotify, Apple, or wherever you get your podcasts!

06/20/2023

The Why Does My Partner podcast is back with episode two of their mini-series, Discord Builds Trust…No Really!

It’s a natural, human thing to want to avoid conflict. We all do it! But when we do, we’re missing the chance to have a new experience of trying something hard with someone we love, and finding out that we can do it. That’s why we call it earning trust.

Our bodies and our brains are primed to remember past struggles and do everything they can to protect us by avoiding the same thing happening again. That doesn’t just apply to our own lived experiences, but also to the generations of learning that have been passed down to us from our ancestors. They teach us that certain things aren’t ok to bring up, are dangerous to even think or feel. That’s what is talking about when he says, “Trauma decontextualized in a people over time can look like culture.”

In this series, they are inviting you to become more aware of these learned beliefs and to sit with them with compassion and kindness. When you do, you have a golden opportunity to blend that learning with other parts of your brain that can take in the world around you as it’s happening right now.

Listen to the full episode now on Spotify, Apple, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Why Does My Partner

06/19/2023

A friend shared this quote with me today. Thank you, Kathy 🩶

06/14/2023

Why Does My Partner is back, dear listeners, as promised with a bonus mini-series: Discord Builds Trust…No Really!

So then why are we sometimes more comfortable with superficial, surface level topics? We’re opening up this conversation by acknowledging that intimacy is hard, and vulnerability can be scary, and wait – just what is a surface level topic, anyway?

The truth is, if you’re feeling like there’s a mismatch between you and your partner on how deeply you’re connecting, there’s a lot of reasons why that could be the case. How are you each defining surface versus depth? How were they treated in your respective families of origin? What else might be going on in your lives that might be affecting your capacity for going deep at this moment?

When we start asking ourselves and our partners these questions, we’re facing the truth that mismatch is inevitable. What feels comforting and close to you might feel invasive and controlling to your partner, and what is light and playful to them could feel superficial or avoiding to you.

In these moments of discord, when our visions of what we want our relationships to look like come into conflict with who our partners really are, that’s when we can put aside our agendas and approach the conversation with curiosity and connection, with a real desire to learn something new about our partners and offer them the opportunity to learn something about us, too.

Listen to the first episode of our four-part miniseries now on Spotify, Apple, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Juliane Taylor Shore, Connectfulness (Rebecca Wong), Your Decision Diva (Victoria Easa)

06/12/2023

How does parts work help your client’s brain create a path of healing? In this course, we will look at how parts work from a neurobiological perspective. When you understand the underlying principles of how parts work are functioning in your client’s brain, you will be able to be more creative and flexible with your parts work. If you are new to parts work, or if you know you like parts work, but feel you are lacking some skills in being able to apply it, then this workshop will help. If you are already doing lots of parts work and love it and also would like to see more clinical examples, understand how parts work helps your client’s brain heal, and would like to deepen the skills you have, then this course is a great fit for that too. June 16, 2023, we hope you can make it!

Register here:

https://www.envisionworkshops.com/julianetaylorshore-june16-2023

06/02/2023

Juliane Taylor Shore has a new online workshop coming up on June 16, 2023! The Neurobiology of Parts Work: Using neuroscience to guide interventions. Register at the link below.

https://www.envisionworkshops.com/julianetaylorshore-june16-2023

06/02/2023

The cat's out of the bag: a new Why Does My Partner bonus mini series is coming soon! You'll often hear us talk on the podcast about how working through conflict can strengthen a relationship, and while this may sound counterintuitive, we really mean it - just ask our listeners! Head over to Spotify, Apple, or your favorite podcast platform now for our Bonus Series Teaser, where we reveal the listener follow up comment that inspired this mini series. Spoiler alert: they did the hard work and found that discord really does build trust. Tune in Tuesday June 13th for Episode 1 of our 4 part mini series.

04/25/2023

Season 4 Finale of Why Does My Partner! Give it a listen and get your questions ready for season 5!

04/22/2023

Juliane Taylor Shore here! ⁣
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I’m so thrilled to share with you that my dear friend Akilah Riley-Richardson, MSW, CCTP has put together a training on helping clients and ourselves with Liberatory Connections. Her work inspires me and I learn so much from her about liberating my own mind from power over thinking. She’s doing a free session on Thursday, May 4 so that you can hear more. If you sign up, you can get the recording even if you can’t catch it live. I think the webinar she put together as well worth your time and I’m so happy to help her spread the word about her amazing work. I think she’s really onto something special 💛 ⁣
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https://webinars.therapywisdom.com/jts-systemic-trauma-couples-therapy

04/20/2023

Welcome back to the Why Does My Partner Podcast. Today’s question leads us into exploring what we each understand sexual intimacy to mean, and what we can do if that understanding doesn't seem to line up with our partner’s. We’re encouraging you, dear listeners, to start to learn about and understand your own sexual templates: what are your likes and dislikes, what are some of the beliefs you have about what those preferences mean, and what in your history has led you there? When you and your partner each engage in that personal work, then there’s an opportunity to talk to each other, confront the projections that might be going on, and come to a place of greater intimacy and understanding. Tune in on Spotify, Apple, or wherever you get your podcasts.

04/11/2023

Welcome back to the Why Does My Partner podcast. This episode’s question asks about a partner who says there’s nothing wrong, but the asker is worried he’s holding back. We take this into a discussion about trust, and how embracing discord gives you an opportunity to strengthen a relationship. We cover what it means to repair after discord, what the research is telling us about conflict and repair, and how often we can really expect that repair to happen…at least in the way we were expecting it.

04/11/2023

Would you know everything about your partner? Like, really, really everything? There’s a delicate balance in every relationship between the intimacy of knowing each other deeply and keeping the magic alive with a bit of mystery.

In this episode, we get into how intimacy comes from knowing a lot about our partner, which makes us feel safe, while mystery – leaving some things unknown – brings the thrill of discovery, intrigue, and passion. Too much safety, and you might not have enough passion, but too much mystery can lead to feeling unsafe and insecure.

That’s where we find this episode’s question asker, who wonders what’s going on when their partner seems to disappear into his inner world, leaving them behind. We discuss some of the possible obstacles to sharing and get into what it actually means to pay attention to your own internal experience. Finally, we finish up with an offer for you to get curious and open up a conversation with your partner that invites closeness and discovery.

04/11/2023

Welcome back to the Why Does My Partner podcast! Rebecca is bringing the question today so that we can go deeper on the language of “power over, power under, and power with.”

We live in such a hierarchical, win-or-lose society, it's no wonder that we learn to think of power as a zero-sum game, where we compete for who has more control, more influence, more freedom to act. But when we learn to switch to power-with thinking, where power is an abundant, shared resource, all of a sudden it’s a lot more messy, a lot less black and white, but there’s room for everyone’s voice to matter, and to have something important to say.

So how do you bring this power-with viewpoint into your relationship? You guessed it, it’s about vulnerability. We’re inviting you to let go a little bit of your fear of losing power, and trust that when you empower others, it empowers you too.

04/05/2023

Repost from Why Does My Partner
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Can remorse be empowering? Spoilers for today’s question, which comes from a listener who finds themselves doing the comforting, when it’s their partner who was doing the apologizing. What’s up with that? Realizing that you’ve hurt someone can bring up feelings of shame and guilt, especially when it’s someone you love. But letting that shame take over can take the focus off doing the repair work you and your partner need after that hurt. We discuss where that shame comes from, and how the alternative – remorse – actually helps you get out of feeling social threat and lets you hold both you and your partner a little more tenderly.

04/05/2023

Repost from Why Does My Partner
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It’s a fun one today on the WDMP podcast as we answer a question that’s sounds at first like it’s about hobbies and taking time for things we enjoy, but really gets down to how we distribute resources in our relationship. We discuss how conflicts over fairness can come up when one or both people in a couple are feeling depleted, anxious, or envious, and how to get out of that trap. We’re talking skills like getting curious, making You-turns, and direct requests.

03/15/2023

Free Webinar with Juliane Taylor Shore on March 21, 2023!

https://webinars.therapywisdom.com/js-memory-reconsolidation-anxiety

FREE WEBINAR on 3/21/23! In this webinar, I will be sharing:⁣
- the relationship between the implicit memory system, and your clients anxiety⁣
- how to change your clients brains on a cellular level with memory reconsolidation⁣
- the three elements of reliable and effective memory consolidation, that you must get right in order for it to work⁣
- how to recognize successful reconsolidation, so you can do it again, and again. ⁣
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I hope you’ll join me.

https://webinars.therapywisdom.com/js-memory-reconsolidation-anxiety

03/15/2023

Juliane Taylor Shore, Connectfulness (Rebecca Wong), and Your Decision Diva (Victoria Easa) welcome you back to the Why Does My Partner Podcast. Instead of a regular question, for this episode they’re answering a listener's request to talk about the dynamics between in*******al couples and the conflicts that arise from their cultural differences.

They take it as an opportunity to slow down and acknowledge that there's so much that comes with this big, heavy topic. There's the weight of inherited hurt and oppression, the weight of silenced voices and marginalized bodies. Of trying to do things differently - maybe even better - than those who came before us. They discuss how this situation can be ripe for misunderstanding as each person brings generations of meaning and experience into the relationship, which could be totally different from their partners. Finally, they share an embodied practice for pausing, checking in with your inner vibrations, and letting yourself imagine what could be and being honest about what you don't know.

*******alrelationships

03/01/2023

Have you heard the Why Does My Partner podcast yet?

S4E2 - a listener brings his concerns about his wife’s friendship with a le***an coworker. Juliane Taylor Shore, Your Decision Diva (Victoria Easa), and Connectfulness (Rebecca Wong) get into topics like feeling dismissed, building trust, and navigating bumpy conversations with your partner where there are lots of tender feelings on both sides. The WDMP team discuss how healthy boundary-setting isn’t about controlling your partner, it’s about knowing your own limits of comfort, and talk about a way of negotiating boundaries with your partner that helps you both slow down, stay curious, and turn this conflict into an opportunity for greater intimacy ♥️

02/28/2023

They’re back! Season 4 Episode 1 and starting off with the big ones like, “what the heck does ‘relational’ even mean?” It’s a word they use all the time on the Why Does My Partner podcast, so could it really be that you and your partner could have totally different ideas of what it means to be relational? And if that’s true, how do you all turn that discovery into an opportunity to co-create our shared relational space?

In true WDMP style, the answers they explore are equal parts brain science, you-turns, and a gentle invitation into vulnerability and a deeper connection to yourself ♥️

https://whydoesmypartner.com/episodes

02/14/2023

Happy Valentine's Day! Are you ready for more Why Does My Partner? S4 drops next week, in the meantime... Juliane Taylor Shore, Connectfulness (Rebecca Wong), and Your Decision Diva’s(Victoria Easa) hope is that at least some of you out there will make this a lover's day with yourself. Your relationship between you and you is a huge foundation for any other love relationship that you have. So even if it's only 5 minutes, send yourself a little love today. Take good care, they'll meet you back here next week.

02/09/2023

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗙𝗼𝘂𝗿- 𝗦𝘁𝗲𝗽 𝗔𝗽𝗼𝗹𝗼𝗴𝘆⁣
1. I did the thing⁣
2. It’s not the only time⁣
3. This is a larger problem for me because I am wrestling with my adaptive child in this way⁣
4. I’m sorry and now I’m going to ⁣
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Join Juliane Taylor Shore, Connectfulness (Rebecca Wong), and Your Decision Diva (Victoria Easa) for a new online workshop Sept 22-24, 2023. They’ll help you explore what keeps you feeling stuck, and to understand, and experience, how your wildly efficient brain moves fast to protect you when you sense danger. ⁣
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These fast protective brain states are less likely to help you move toward more nuanced processes like connection and reasoning through complex thinking and feeling. The skills and tools they cover in this workshop will help you develop practices that support your capacity to spend more time in integrated brain states that promote relational connection. And when you put it all together, integrating these new skills and practices will help you experience more ease in your relationships, even in the sticky hard moments that can derail an evening, a week, or even an entire relationship. ⁣
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If you want to get closer, say the things that usually go unspoken, and trust each other (and yourself) to get through the hard moments, this is the workshop for you ♥️⁣

Want to learn more and register? 👇👇👇

https://whydoesmypartner.com/events/p/sept2023

01/30/2023

Here's what Juliane Taylor Shore with IPNB Psychotherapy of Austin says about The Power of Discord.

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/the-power-of-discord-tickets-483905884527

01/24/2023

‼️UPDATE‼️The price to register is $375, not $355.

Juliane Taylor Shore will be doing an IN PERSON experiential training in Portland Oregon (vancouver WA, which is just across the bridge) in March 2023.

If you are in the Portland area, or want to come to the Portland area, Jules would love to see you there.

It is on one of her very favorite topics: Memory Reconsolidation

01/20/2023

Online Workshop coming soon! ⁣
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In this overview of using neuroscience to inform your clinical work, you will learn how to use neuroscience to inform case conceptualization and treatment planning with clients so that you will be able to create treatment plans with the brain in mind.

https://www.envisionservices.ca/julianetaylorshorefeb11

01/07/2023

https://www.psychotherapynetworker.org/article/quieting-relentless-inner-critic?token=7E1A733C-080B-4B65-B5E8-F0B0A4B715AC

12/13/2022

Join Juliane Taylor Shore virtually or in person for a 2 hour lecture on memory reconsolidation that she will be presenting at the psychotherapy networker this year. She is excited to spread the word about how to help our clients shift learnings in the subcortical system. Hope you can make it.

https://www.psychnetworker.org/2023/?refid=jshore

12/08/2022

From Senior Clincian Kim Schaefer - The Heart of Therapy Group is BACK! I am excited to open applications for a new cohort to join this supportive training group starting in January 2023. The Heart of Therapy focuses on exploring the basics of experiential therapy while attending to the humanness of being a mental health practitioner. Developed for new(ish) therapists, this group is a fit for those who would enjoy additional education on working with clients in a deep experiential way. Part training group and part process group, this is an opportunity to learn practical didactic material on incorporating experiential trauma-healing modalities while allowing time for connection, support and consultation. We’ll meet every other Thursday beginning January 12th. For more information and to apply, please visit https://mindbodywellnessatx.com/heartoftherapytraining
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12/02/2022

Before we do ANYTHING else - when it comes to meeting our children, other adults in our lives, or our own parts that live inside of us, the FIRST thing we need to say is: “I believe you. I believe you that you feel this way.”

If we do not start with that, we send messaging that can shut down connection & closeness and shut down the part of us that wonders “is what I feel & experience real? Am I real?”

Thank you for all your beautiful teaching on this.

Repost from .therapy ❤️

11/30/2022

Join IPNB Psychotherapy of Austin Affiliate Akilah Riley-Richardson, MSW, CCTP, RLT for her FREE one hour webinar on 1/12/23! Register Now!

https://akilahrileyrichardson.com/events

11/30/2022

In this 11-minute video Juliane Taylor Shore shares one simple key – a neurobiology hack – you can use to work with your client’s brain to help them gain more compassion and self-esteem today. You may also find this tip useful to support your practice and life overall. This is a great extension of your work with therapist client relationship boundaries. This video gives a taste for Jules’s dynamic, engaging teaching style and integrative approach to neurobiology for clinicians.

Get this quick and effective brain hack for psychologists and therapists working in clinical setting. Build confidence and enjoy low-stress sessions.

11/15/2022

Asking for help & support is hard! Here are some phrases for you to try out in a time when you’re in need and don’t know how to say it 🫶⁣
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Reposting .therapy ❤️⁣
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10/21/2022

If there is a discovery to be made may we be gentle enough with ourselves to hear it. -

10/18/2022

We all face client’s with large and small traumas and watched as it affects their lives years after the difficult moments have passed. In truth, every therapist is a trauma therapist. ⁣
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Learning to help your clients unwind trauma from their subcortical brains will be helpful in guiding their healing. In this course, we will explore the neurological underpinning of implicit memory. We will look at how these memories are created, organized, and solidified. We will look at how, when they are are created in times of trauma, the learnings lead to perceptions, beliefs and actions that create stress and pain for ourselves and others. ⁣
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Join me on October 28 to learn about:⁣
- The Brain Basics and the implicit memory system⁣
- How traumatic and emotionally difficult learnings are part of the implicit memory system⁣
- Memory consolidation and reconsolidation ⁣
- The neuroscience underpinning a therapeutic stance that supports this process⁣
- Healing Implicit Memory Systems and Grief⁣
- How grief and trauma work are intertwined⁣
- Identify grief avoidance in clients⁣
- Interventions to invite clients out of avoidance⁣
- Identify common countertransference in the therapist as clients enter grief ⁣
- Create self care and soothing plans to use in session to increase therapist emotional regulation ⁣
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https://workshops.envisioncourses.com/therapists-guide-juliane-cad/