Andy Lane Counseling

06/26/2023

*HUGE ANNOUNCEMENT*

I’ve been accepted by the Inter-Regional Society of Jungian Analysts for training!

The admissions process is so wild. Masters/Phd requirement, mental health license, and 100 hours of personal analysis with a board certified Jungian Analyst before APPLYING.

(These days if you throw a rock in Austin, you’ll hit a therapist. But there’s only one practicing Jungian Analyst in Austin to my knowledge. I am currently at session 125 with my analyst from Santa Fe and have been in personal analysis since May, 2020.)

Training is its own beast— a 4 to 7 year program consisting of a bunch of details including a mid program, 5 hour analytic interview followed by a few years of working on a dissertation. Oh, and the way you know you’re done? A dream will tell you.

This has been so hard to write out because I can’t fully express how excited that I am. 🥰🌀😬🧙‍♂️😎

07/29/2022

When we’re afraid, the only part of us that’s afraid is our ego.

What is the ego? It’s our compass for navigating success/failure, time/space, and how to survive. Its sole purpose is to keep the status quo and make sure we are comfortable and safe.

However, life is not comfortable or safe. So the consequence of only being comfortable is flatland and no personal growth. In fact, CG Jung called our ego “the tiny self” because its entire purpose is to limit incoming information with a new scary, high tech defensive strategy called “fear”.

Damn. So what do we do? Well we need this weird thing called “fear” to guide us.

Fear is our indicator of where we aren’t comfortable. And often that’s where the goldmine of growth resides.

Fear is a terrible, terrible compass. And wherever it points us toward is often exactly what we need most.

Use fear as a friend. An awful friend who is usually right. See it as merely a guide. Comfort has a place when we need to come home, but…

Go with your fear. Live life on life’s terms. Then come home to reflect and remind yourself that you are one day braver than you were yesterday.

04/19/2022

Hello friends both new and seasoned! Here is a picture of my house— the Biltmore Estate. If you zoom in you can see all of the potential clients on my wait list hanging out while I laugh casually at the camera between sessions.

Just pullin your leg! But while I have you here, I thought I’d do a little reintroduction.

I’m Andy, a therapist here in Austin, Tx. I talk to people about their daydreams and their night dreams. We meet weekly and talk about the story of their lives. Then I put on my proverbial editor hat and we write the story they want to live. As I like to say, the first half of life is biographical, but the second half is autobiographical.

My stuff is Jungian. It’s Narrative. It’s Existential. But really it’s just Andy.

So the answer is *no*. Those aren’t my potential clients on my wait list. But I DO live at the Biltmore Estate. Cuz that’s the story I’m writing RN and life itself has no rules.

12/15/2021

The holidays are here and there’s a ton of things a family member might do or say that really get under your skin.

But don’t give your power away.

There is a paper thin line between avoidance of very needed discussion and simply not letting someone ruin your day because they do that one thing. over. and. over.

Be aware of symptoms that trigger your complexes and distill them with a smile— not today Krampus!

The question really is “who is in charge of your emotional state?” Who holds that power? Don’t give it away. 🧙‍♂️

09/24/2021

Probably the biggest contention I have with the New Age movement is the idea that we don’t need an ego— we do. But the ego just means “my ability to navigate the world of people and things and my perception of myself throughout that process”. So you can have an overinflated ego and think you’re hot s**t or have an under-inflated and think you’re worthless. Neither are accurate.

So throughout the beginning half of life, we NEED to learn how to make it in the world of people and things. However, when we grow, we need to understand that our ego (or compass to navigate) ISNT who we are. It’s just a compass. It’s learned.

The goal is separating the True Self, from our understanding of who we are. Who were you before you were born? Who were you before you knew gravity, smells, or sounds? That’s the Self. Someone who says “I know exactly who I am” is surely in fig 1. They can’t understand the difference between a pattern and their natural Self. Someone who says “oh I’ve developed that pattern, but I know that I’m always learning” is in the further stages.

As Terry Allen put it “My Ego ain’t my amigo anymore.” But maybe I’ll rephrase that as “My Ego ain’t my only goal anymore.” The goal is to accept our compass and ourselves behind the compass. And maybe we’ll walk away a little more balanced.

09/02/2021

09/02/2021

09/02/2021

Hello friends here’s your end of the week 👏kick 👏in👏 the👏 ass. The two least productive days of the year are yesterday and tomorrow. How long have you been staring at that one thing on your to-do-list? Have you re-written it each day hoping it might one day be scratched off?

One of the greatest aha moments I’ve ever had was realizing that often I will trick my mind into thinking that if I repeat *writing down* something on my to-do list, it feels like I’m one step closer to doing it—when in fact I’m just *mistaking a thought as an action* in itself. I can’t count the amount of times that I wrote down “deep clean the cat’s litterbox” and the act of daily putting that on my to-do list makes me feel like I’ve considered the task, therefore I’m all good…almost like a daily “fix” for productivity.

In reality its just a poor substitute for actually doing the action itself. 😰

So rather than saying you will get to it one day, do yourself a favor and live right now. Perhaps tomorrow you’ll be grateful.
👽😷🤖

06/22/2021

Your problem is portable. And what I mean by this is— we take all that has happened to us throughout our day-to-day and, if unaddressed, throughout our lives.

The body holds trauma and has its own agenda for the timing of a panic attack. Similarly, you may dream of your unresolved conflict with your mother well after she dies. These two examples show that there’s more going on beneath the curtain than our ego’s try and let on.

Way more beneath the curtain. But if it’s true that our lives are about becoming “more you than you thought you could be” (which I happen to believe is why we’re here), then pushing these things down is only self destruction and antithetical to our reason for why we’re here. It results in a life lived blind, unexamined and limited.

There’s a scene in the Wizard of Oz where Toto pulls back the curtain revealing that the wizard is a human. Dorothy shouts “you are a very bad man!” To which the man behind the curtain replies “No my dear. I’m a very good man. I’m just a very very bad wizard.”

We’re only fooling ourselves. Let’s not be bad wizards.

06/07/2021

🧙‍♂️👽🖖

02/16/2021

“The art of losing isn’t hard to master.”

A poem fitting for a pandemic.

Poem text and context: https://www.brainpickings.org/2021/01/31/elizabeth-bishop-one-art Recorded by for Brain Pickings.

01/29/2021

This episode o the Therapist Happy Hour we talk about the baggage we bring to new relationships. How much of our attitudes toward our partners are projections from our inner world? And how much is actually living in the moment? Good talk! Happy weekend everyone!

We talk about relationships and all of the "Stuff" we bring on the adventure

01/29/2021

This episode on the Therapist Happy Hour we talk about the baggage we bring to new relationships. How much of our attitudes toward our partners are projections from our inner world? And how much is actually from living in the moment? Good talk! Happy weekend everyone!

12/31/2020

What is a myth? A child once defined it as something that might not be true on the outside, but is true on the inside. This is my favorite definition. Bare with me for a second as I get nerdy with symbolism.

This year our story is filled with tales of The Wind. From the fires of California that made the air unfit to breathe to an invisible enemy called the Corona Virus that is passed through the air— The Wind, usually an invisible force, wants to be known.

In the Judea-Christian story of creation, Yahweh breathed life into humankind. 2020 seems to be a constant tale of an all powerful being taking it back through that same vessel— The Wind. As people’s lungs give out in hospital rooms, George Floyd’s last words cry out saying “I can’t breathe! I can’t breathe!”

I sit outside on my patio this NYE. I feel the wind dance on my face. I love the randomness of it playing with my hair, rustling my papers, and singing when it changes speed. It’s speaking to me. It is different from the stale air in my home. And I respect it more than I ever have for its power and its ability to communicate. All year it’s been warning me of how even beautiful things like these feelings and sounds can come from something that can also be terrible.

This year my house hasn’t been a wood, brick or stone foundation. It’s been a sail to take me far away to an inner world filled with both wonder and danger. I’ve experienced sorrow and helplessness. But I’ve also experienced joy and wholeness. I’ve learned a lot about myself and it feels like a new king has taken the throne of my life. A king who is more aware because they have seen the Inner World and know the truths within The Myth of the Wind. Something that might not be true on the outside, but is a fact on the inside.

And I am most excited to shift my intrapersonal, isolated learning to an interpersonal, experiential one. Somewhere that I can see friends across a fire pit full of dancing flames...Take a flight to the coast and book a window seat just for the view...Or take rides on my brother’s sailboat.

I’m ready to learn how to live again.

If The Wind permits.

12/21/2020

The hopes and fears of all the years are here with us tonight.

Here
on the first day of Winter.

Here
on the turning of the page. It is

Here
that we meet our inner child who is both

Here
and daydreaming of there.

Here
I am full of hope, but terrified because

Here
It’s been really hard. So

Here
are gifts and promises for change and it is

Here
that we can begin to heal.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays. From my most authentic Self to yours. ♾💙🧙‍♂️

12/15/2020

Generally, the 1st half of our lives are spent learning the rules of our tribe while also trying to understand the game of making it in the world of people and things. We gain skills, learn the tribe’s values of “right” and “wrong”, and discipline ourselves in 100 different ways. The 2nd half is where it gets interesting. At that time, we find our calling by re-evaluating old values, and introduce a new way of *being* in the world. The first half conforms to survive, but the tribe tells us who we are— it is biographical. The second half breaks from the mold so as to *become*, but that can be lonely—it is written by you and only you. It is auto-biographical. All along the way, everything still continues to contribute to our wholeness. ♾😌💙

12/13/2020

Episode 2 is up! Come hang out with Coel Counseling, Colin Moss, and I as we discuss anxiety. What is it/why do we have it/what do we do about it?

Jason, Andy, and Colin discuss how they deal with and work with anxiety.

11/18/2020

Check out the newest episode of The Therapist Happy Hour to see how we handle Burnout!

Andy, Jason, and Colin discuss burnout and how they handle it.

10/27/2020

The word “decide” shares the same root as “su***de” and “homicide”. It’s no wonder that our choices have so much weight. To pick something is to choose which option lives. It shuts the door on an alternate reality.

How do we navigate choices?

One way to navigate choices it to ground ourselves in our values and let them guide us. If I value support over independence, I may choose one option. If I value freedom over structure, I may choose another.

This is an ACT (Acceptance Commitment Therapy) concept that my friend and colleague, Colin Moss, turned me on to and it’s been a low hum in the back of my mind since we discussed it.

May our choices this week be met with more authenticity and inner authority. And may our lives be lived with the beating rhythm of our uniqueness and consistent being.

09/25/2020

Grateful to have been the guest for the podcast “What Living Matters” this week. Hear me talk about my favorite subjects including—the music scene as a healing community, writers block and Chet Baker. At the end of the episode you’ll also hear a song that I recorded in my living room earlier this year! Link in bio! ✨🎤✨

09/21/2020

There is so much going on in our heads as we navigate difficult conversations during this season. Because we are always creating and meeting boundaries nearly every minute, it is super important to remember what emotions YOU are responsible for. Taking on other’s emotions and trying to read someone else’s mind will only create even more confusion in an already difficult interaction. In a sentence— Do not take on someone else’s emotional responsibility in your co-created reality together.

09/15/2020

09/15/2020

How the warm rays of hope and healing enter the dark inner chamber of leaden loneliness through the unexpected cracks of kindness.

Nadine, depressed and alone, has been living her life in the dark. A gift from a friendly neighbor gives Nadine something to live for. With a new life, Nadine has…

08/25/2020

Doesn’t it seem as though every breakthrough we have in therapy is so obvious after the fact? My quarantine breakthrough met me in March. Up until this year, I saw my relationship with mental health as “finding the golden nugget of insight” almost like an archeologist exploring the depths of my psyche. If I read enough, surrounded myself with inspiring people (yes that’s you), and asked the right questions, then maybe I’ll get to where I need to be. I’m not angry at myself for this, after all— I am a child of western thought and capitalism. From birth ive been primed for the idea of “action creates meaning” and the pursuit of happiness is... well it’s a pursuit! But once a pandemic hit and I stopped the busyness of life—all the bells and whistles that I used as tools to become more self aware were unavailable.

I was paradoxically confined to a prison that was the unlimited vastness of my inner self. I’m going to call that place the unconscious if you don’t mind (see “Inner Work” by Robert A. Johnson for more on this).

When we get our ego out of the way, we can finally hear what everything BUT our every-day-thought is trying to tell us. Yes this is in our dreams. Yes this is in meditation, active imagination and journaling. But it’s not just our unconscious! I mean even listening to what our body is telling us (trauma is lodged in the body, see “The Body Keeps the Score” by Bessel Van Der Kolk).

Friends- the recipe of love is to be Open and to be Curious. Give yourself some damn self-love and listen so that you can be open and curious with yourself. Listen so that you can hear what everything within you is trying to show you. 👤😎💫

08/20/2020

Dear Austin musician/artists/creatives! Here’s a grant with a huge budget to help you out right now. Sign up before August 28th!

Application Opens: August 17, 2020 at 10:00 a.m. Application Closes: August 28, 2020 at 5:00 p.m.

08/17/2020

Wishing this wacky world a safe week. Wishing this wacky week a safe world. Love from a distance 🌏💙💫

07/31/2020

In stillness we are all lost in our thoughts. Problem solving becomes more of an inward process than co-created. This is fine, but it also means we unconsciously assume someone SHOULD know what we are thinking. Someone SHOULD know that one thing would “make me angry”, “upset me” or just “isn’t part of the plan”. This is projection. More than ever we are asking our family and friends to read our minds because we are more forced into our thoughts than ever before. In reality they are lost in their heads too. The way out is to intentionally communicate directly with respect and a heart of compassion. 💫The synchronicity bit, however, is just bizarre right? 💫 There are so many eerie connections that can be noticed because our minds aren’t distracted from the bells and whistles of life. 😌

06/19/2020

I watch this speech a couple times a year. Neil likes to remind me "...now go and make interesting mistakes. Make good art."

Neil Gaiman Addresses the University of the Arts Class of 2012 One of the best commencement speeches. A must watch for any artist and everyone who hopes to b...

06/08/2020

Astrophysicist Janna Levin reading "A Great and Startling Truth" by Maya Angelou. It is, in her words, “the hope for peace, which lies, sometimes hidden, in every heart.”

Recorded at The Universe in Verse 2018: https://www.brainpickings.org/the-universe-in-verse/ For poem text, context, and the story of how Carl Sagan may have inspired Angelou's poem, go here: https:/

05/24/2020

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/sapient-nature/202005/is-it-ok-feel-good-during-the-coronavirus-outbreak

Why it is not just OK, but even desirable, to feel good during the outbreak.

04/30/2020

Outdoor therapy for Indoor times

There's no shortage of research highlighting the benefits of spending time in the great outdoors. All manner of studies highlight things like how access to the outdoors is better for our vision and improves our mental health. While the reasons for th

04/20/2020

Even if there’s a lot going on around us, we can still feel lonely. I’ve felt alone in a crowd or among friends. I’ve also felt completely seen and recognized when there’s no one around but myself. This dispels the myth that feeling lonely means you’re alone. And THAT means we can deal with it internally without having to call up our crew. However, it IS true that the less time we spend with others, the more we spend with our inner voice— who has a tendency to mutate into this annoying monster called the “inner critic”. When the critic is around, it will send cruel commentary on our worth and ultimately make us shut down from hearing a bunch of messages of limited potential. F that. To prevent the inner voice from mutating into the inner critic, 1) catch it throughout the day (Recognition), 2) approach the voice without judgment as a “security system” going haywire (Acceptance), and then 3) question and reframe the validity of the criticism to an understanding of the reality of the situation (Self-Compassion). It is here that we see ourselves without needing to be seen by others. And it is here that we get back to our truest selves without accepting our otherwise unaddressed, unknown myths that overtake us when we aren’t looking.

04/14/2020

Follow a therapist that you connect with, but live in another city? No problem! As long as the therapist has a license in your state, you can see them! If you live in Texas and are seeking some help, DM me and we can set up a free consultation

04/13/2020

Pause your to-do list and ask yourself-- "What does now need?"

04/11/2020

04/09/2020

“How do we make sense of where we are and where do we find hope?” If we look to all the stories that have been told before us, we can see a structured journey. (Or, if you’d like, a Hero’s Journey) Perhaps you’ve already experienced this several times. Perhaps you’ve gone through trials, made allies, fought dragons, gotten lost, felt isolated and alone... then found yourself standing with resiliency. You found yourself changed forever with new tools, new knowledge and a better understanding of love and life. Sound familiar? That’s because this is a path we all have explored. And that means it unifies us in our humanity. Through social distancing we aren’t isolated in our chapter for this particular story. We’re paving a new path for a new world together. And we are currently writing a story that, when others are seeking hope, they will look to how we coped on page 2020 of this weird book we’re writing. When you feel lost, know you are not alone. When you feel beaten, know that the story isn’t over. And— just like the stories we have read before, you will return home stronger and connected to all of the other heroes that have come before you. The greatest of all your tools is a memory to hold on to— remember that you are love and you are light.

03/04/2020

03/03/2020

Who ever thought the promise land was Iowa?

In the West, many reported suicidal ideation, while many in the South reported depression. People on the West Coast had a high rate of anxiety.