05/27/2023
It’s been a few months since my bike accident. I am not the type of person who shares things in times of despair and hopelessness. I still haven’t really accepted the fact that I got hit by a Mack truck. I don’t like to burden others with my issues. I just keep pushing along while saying “oh, I’ll be fine. A fractured leg, shoulder blade, concussion, broken ribs, fluid in the lungs, stitches. No big deal.” Christ, I went back to work two weeks after shock trauma. I just couldn’t accept it. Even as I was healing from the more severe conditions , I developed others. The force of the hit broke the connective tissue in the skin causing fluid to pool in my legs. I had “morel lavelle lesions”on my leg. Looks like a huge Water balloon on my knee. Had several painful weekly drains and it’s finally starting to get better.
Then I started having migraines with auras and dizziness. Had to take myself to urgent care in the middle of my son’s birthday party. I knew something wasn’t right. Numbness, dizziness and pressure in my head. Commence freak out.
Still went to work to keep my mind occupied and because I wanted to continue to help my clients stay healthy.
Luckily my GP sent me for a brain MRI today. I had a bad feeling. The procedure wasn’t awful but the accompanying results took my breath away. GO TO THE ER
NOW!
So I’m laying here in a bed alone waiting to be moved to the main hospital. Kissed my wife goodnight and now I fight all of the “what ifs?” as I await surgery tomorrow. They have to drill into my skull to drain a subdural hematoma that is creating pressure in my brain. WTH?!?! Then I have to lie on my side for 2 days with drains in my skull.
I’m terrified! I know I’m in good hands but I feel so alone.
My poor wife that has to deal with all of these ups and downs. My kids. My family and friends. I’m trying really hard to be strong. I don’t want pity party. I really don’t know why I’m finally sharing this other than I’m frightened and I don’t know what to do in this time of waiting. Health is everything.
My anticipated smile awaits the faces of my loved ones.
