Heath Schechinger, Ph.D.

04/16/2024

A Momentous Day for Family and Relationship Diversity!

Oakland, CA makes history as the third city in the U.S., and first on the West Coast, to enact a non-discrimination ordinance, protecting diverse families and relationships from discrimination in housing and provision of goods and services. It specifically names protections for multi-partner/multi-parent families and relationships, step families, single parents, multi-generational households, consensually non-monogamous relationships, and consensual sexual and/or intimate relationships, including asexual and aromantic relationships.

This ordinance is a testament to the evolving American family, embodying timeless values that rise above political divides: stability, respect, and the inherent right to familial love and cohesion. It's designed to cater to the diverse needs of individuals, offering tailored support that acknowledges the uniqueness of every family structure.

Families, in all their forms, are foundational to a stable, nurturing society. Recognizing and supporting all families is practical and aligns with core values across the political spectrum.

A similar ordinance has been proposed in Berkeley, CA and is set to be reviewed in the Spring.

My colleagues and I at PLAC were proud to have drafted this as well as the similar groundbreaking non-discrimination ordinance passed by Somerville and Cambridge, MA. It's a forward-thinking acknowledgement that diverse family structures, including polyamorous relationships, embody the very essence of stability, mutual support, and shared responsibilities – values at the heart of traditional family dynamics.

It has been an honor of Dr. Lily Lamboy and I on behalf of the Modern Family Institute, to work alongside OPEN - Organization for Polyamory and Ethical Non-monogamy, and Polyamory Legal Advocacy Coalition, Harvard LGBTQ Advocacy Clinic, Chosen Family Law Center, Inc., Asexuality Visibility Network, Bonobo Network, among many, many others on this ordinance. I also want to extend our heartfelt appreciation to the trailblazers of the polyamory movement, including the dedicated team at PolyActive. Their enduring efforts have paved the way for the achievements we celebrate today.

A special note of appreciation goes to Councilwoman Ramachandran - her visionary leadership is a true asset to Oakland's city council.

03/22/2024

Let's collaborate to embrace the evolving nature of family in today's society.

The Modern Family Institute is working to ensure everyone has the rights, infrastructure, and social support to create families that make sense to them. We seek to nurture and grow forms of committed family care and diverse relationship structures including q***r and multi-parent families, adopted, foster, and blended families, single parents, child free and aromantic chosen families, as well as families built through assisted reproduction. Follow along with our work on our website.

https://www.modernfamilyinstitute.org/

03/20/2024

In a world where love isn’t one-size-fits-all, more individuals are embracing alternatives to monogamy. The conversation around polyamory is gaining momentum, shedding light on diverse relationship structures of all types. Beyond the misconceptions lies a deeper understanding of polyamory as a framework for genuine connection, mutual respect, and communities of care.

The shift in the conversation around family and relationship structure over the years can be attributed to a variety of non-partisan factors that reflect broader social, economic, and technological changes. These factors have reshaped the landscape of what we consider a family or a relationship, transcending political divides. Legal recognition is a crucial step towards validating these diverse family structures and helping them be more self-reliant. How do societal norms shape our understanding of love and family? Follow the link below to learn more about polyamory, the misconceptions it faces, and how communities are advocating for inclusive policies to support diverse relationship structures.

https://www.axios.com/2024/02/14/polyamory-laws-nonmonogamy-stigma

03/13/2024

We’re one step closer to protecting diverse family and relationship structures in Oakland! The bill my colleagues and I drafted passed unanimously 'on consent' through the sub-committee yesterday and will face a vote at the full city council next Tuesday, where it is extremely likely to pass.

Passing on consent means it was deemed non-controversial, and there was unanimous agreement among the members present that it should be adopted. Unless a member of the council requests a discussion or a formal vote on Tuesday (which is unlikely), the item will be considered approved as part of the consent agenda in the meeting. Given this progress, the passage of the ordinance on the upcoming Tuesday appears virtually assured!

Yesterday, my colleagues and I gathered to support the ordinance, sponsored by Councilwoman Janani Ramachandran (pictured, center). The ordinance will protect diverse families and relationships from discrimination in housing and provision of goods and services. It specifically names protections for multi-partner/multi-parent families and relationships, step families, single parents, multi-generational households, consensually non-monogamous relationships, and consensual sexual and/or intimate relationships, including asexual and aromantic relationships.

Pictured are a few people who testified in support of the ordinance including Brett Chamberlin of OPEN - Organization for Polyamory and Ethical Non-monogamy, and Alexander Chen of the Harvard LGBTQ Advocacy Clinic, Lily Lamboy and me on behalf of the Modern Family Institute, among many, many others.

03/13/2024

Exciting Developments for Family Diversity in Berkeley and Oakland!🏡💖

As someone deeply invested in evolving family dynamics and the recognition of diverse relationship structures, I’m thrilled to share news that hits close to home and heart. Berkeley and Oakland City Council members are leading a charge to protect diverse families, proposing nondiscrimination bills that pave the way for inclusivity and legal recognition.

This initiative, building off a bill initially proposed by Polyactive, and championed by the grassroots efforts of OPEN - Organization for Polyamory and Ethical Non-monogamy and supported by the Modern Family Institute and the Polyamory Legal Advocacy Coalition, aims to safeguard families and relationships from discrimination in housing, business, and city services. It’s a testament to the power of community advocacy and the urgent need for our laws to reflect the diversity of modern love and kinship.

The legislation is not just about legal protections; it’s a statement of belonging and acceptance. It challenges us to examine what family means in the 21st century, recognizing that love, support, and commitment are not confined to structures that gained popularity in the 1940s.

Let’s use this moment to engage in deeper conversations about family, love, and the importance of legal inclusivity. Share your thoughts and join me in celebrating this step forward for diversity and acceptance. Together, we can build a more inclusive future for all families. 🎉👨‍👨‍👧‍👦

https://www.dailycal.org/news/city/communities/protection-for-nontraditional-family-structures-could-come-to-berkeley-oakland/article_95bf619c-ccae-11ee-b532-df0335fc2b1a.html

03/08/2024

In an era where the contours of family and intimacy are being redrawn, my latest blog post ventures into the transformative landscape of relationships. With a mere 18% of American households fitting the traditional nuclear family mold and one-third of Americans envisioning their ideal relationship outside the bounds of strict monogamy, we are witnessing a significant shift towards consensual non-monogamy (CNM). This piece not only sheds light on these evolving dynamics but also advocates for increased inclusivity in healthcare and workplaces, mirroring these societal changes.

As we explore the nuances of modern relationships, the article serves as a catalyst for conversation, urging us to explore our understanding of love, partnership, and family structures. Offering six strategic approaches for fostering a more accepting environment for relationship diversity in the workplace, it invites us to reflect and move towards understanding the ways employees are structuring their families and relationships today. Join the dialogue and discover how we can contribute to a more inclusive society by reading my blog through the link below. Let's celebrate every form of love and family together. 💬

https://medium.com/.schechinger/six-tangible-steps-for-employers-to-support-consensually-non-monogamous-employees-6a4280ecf06c

02/23/2024

Berkeley and Oakland recently became the first two West Coast cities to introduce groundbreaking non-discrimination bills protecting family and relationship structure diversity! If they pass, they will become the third and fourth cities in the US to pass this type of legislation, following Somerville and Cambridge, MA.

This milestone not only marks a pivotal shift toward inclusivity and recognition for all forms of families and relationships on the West Coast but also continues to set a precedent for cities nationwide. It underscores the vital importance of acknowledging the diverse ways people come together to form bonds of love, support, and commitment. By championing these laws, we’re not just advocating for the rights of non-nuclear families; we’re reinforcing the fundamental principle that love, in all its forms, deserves protection and recognition. This is a step forward in our journey towards a society where every individual’s choice of family and relationship structure is respected and valued equally.

Shout out to OPEN - Organization for Polyamory and Ethical Non-monogamy who spearheaded this robust grassroots campaign, and Polyamory Legal Advocacy Coalition who drafted the ordinance. It’s been an honor to have worked on this over the past two years by supporting the legislative drafting with data-driven research, consultation, and testimony.
The Oakland bill was introduced by District 4 Councilmember Janani Ramachandran, and the Berkeley bill was introduced by District 2 Councilmember.

Images used with consent from OPEN.

02/05/2024

Despite our hyper-connected world, loneliness persists.

As our understanding of the loneliness epidemic deepens, we’re beginning to explore solutions to this pervasive issue. One surprising area of interest? Many people are reporting that consensually non-monogamous (CNM) relationships are offering additional avenues for meaningful connections, emotional support, and improved care systems. CNM isn’t a one-size-fits all solution but some people find it to be a helpful anecdote to the loneliness epidemic. Let's talk about the potential of diverse relationship structures fostering genuine human connection in an increasingly isolating world. Link to my blog below. 🗣️

https://medium.com/.schechinger/loneliness-epidemic-meets-modern-love-can-consensual-non-monogamy-help-address-the-issue-91bfa7e2fabb

01/31/2024

Everyone deserves a healthy family.

At the Modern Family Institute, we believe family should be defined by its function, not its structure. This function is to provide stability, love, meaning-making, and consistent care across a person’s lifetime. Currently, there are many diverse ways of loving and caring for one another that are not supported by our built environment, city planning, laws, and social norms. The Modern Family Institute aims to change this landscape by ensuring all people have access to the rights, infrastructure, and social support to create families that make sense to them. Follow along with our work on our website.

https://www.modernfamilyinstitute.org/

01/11/2024

🌍 Future of Families: A fascinating Big Think article predicts a shift towards smaller, more vertically oriented family networks with fewer cousins but more great-grandparents as people live longer and at the end of this century, humanity’s population growth is predicted to conclude. These changes are set to reshape caregiving dynamics, placing increased pressure on middle-aged adults who must balance caring for elderly parents and young children. To address these evolving challenges, experts call for enhanced investment in childcare and elderly care services. The role of childless individuals and chosen family as additional caregivers has and will continue to emerge as a pivotal aspect in future family support systems. Explore how these trends might impact family structures by 2100. Read the full article from Big Think:

https://bigthink.com/the-future/families-in-2100/

As population growth slows, the structure of families is set to radically change by 2100, with implications for global society.

01/04/2024

The divide between monogamy and polyamory is a false dichotomy. You can be both, in different quantities and qualities, at different times, and with different people. The labels of ‘monogamy’ and ‘polyamory’ are rough models to explain how we feel, not one-size-fits-all options.
Have you felt your relationship identity expressed in both monogamous and polyamorous connections? 🤔 The concept of ambiamory might resonate with you! Explore more about this fascinating concept from Multiamory

https://www.multiamory.com/podcast/429-is-ambiamory-right-for-you

01/02/2024

“The function of a family is to provide stability, love, meaning making, and consistent care across someone’s lifetime. It doesn’t matter where they are getting that from. We have examples of humans getting support from both biological and non-biological kin for as long as humans have been in existence. Currently, there are many diverse ways to form loving and caring families for one another that aren’t supported by our built environment, city planning, laws, or social norms.”

Check out the latest episode of Jenny Stefonatti’s Denizen podcast where my Polyamory Legal Advocacy Coalition cofounder Alexander Chen and I discuss modern family structures and the work being done to support them.

https://open.spotify.com/episode/2clBoQi4YNZuxlvFlPRS8k?si=AooF0fUBSai8zaOkbqY0SA

https://www.modernfamilyinstitute.org/

12/20/2023

“Today, the nuclear family, a white picket fence, and married parents are increasingly becoming an American dream that younger generations are simply no longer chasing. Either they don’t want it, or it’s not financially viable to attain.”

This shift in priorities and values isn’t just a financial decision; it’s a cultural one. As we observe these changes, it’s essential to engage in conversations about what these choices mean for our society and the concept of family.

The evolving definitions of family and success reflect a broader understanding of personal fulfillment, beyond the traditional markers of adulthood. It’s a testament to the resilience and adaptability of younger generations as they navigate an ever-changing world.

Embracing this diversity in life paths not only enriches our communities but also aligns with the values of inclusivity and acceptance. As we move forward, let’s continue to support and validate the myriad ways people choose to build their lives and families.

https://finance.yahoo.com/news/house-marriage-kids-millennials-gen-093000613.html

Rachel Gottlieb of UBS, co-author of Money and Love, Abby Davisson, and Albion Financial Group's Doug Wells on reprioritizing life's milestones.

12/18/2023

Historic News! 🎉

GLMA: Health Professionals Advancing LGBTQ+ Equity has officially passed a position statement recognizing and supporting consensually non-monogamous (CNM) individuals! This marks a first in the history of U.S. national health professional associations, breaking new ground in recognizing and backing CNM.

GLMA is urging health professionals to engage with research and practice in a culturally competent manner to reduce health disparities faced by CNM individuals. They’re also advocating for policies inclusive of CNM and calling for organized spaces within health professional organizations to further training and research.

This declaration is a watershed moment, significantly transforming the way healthcare professionals perceive and interact with relationship diversity. It lays a foundational cornerstone for future policy developments and paves the way for creating evidence-based practice guidelines. This is a clarion call in the broader movement towards acknowledging and valuing the diverse ways people form families and relationships in our contemporary world. 🌍

I was proud to help draft and provided consultation on this statement. It’s been an honor to contribute to such a transformative and impactful initiative. I would also like to acknowledge Jared Boot-Haury as a leader in producing this statement for GLMA.

12/13/2023

Honored to discuss modern family structures and the work underway to support them with my colleague Alex Chen on the latest podcast episode from Denizen. As cofounders of Polyamory Legal Advocacy Coalition our discussion here widens the lens beyond consensual non-monogamy into a broader conversation about family. We talk about research and legal advocacy to support the modern family structures we are seeing in our world today. Check out this podcast on Spotify.🎙️

https://open.spotify.com/episode/2clBoQi4YNZuxlvFlPRS8k?si=9a1ef5e568954a0f

https://www.modernfamilyinstitute.org

12/12/2023

The critique often levied against consensual non-monogamy (CNM) is that it represents a choice, and as such, may not merit social support or legal protection. However, this line of argument appears to oversimplify the nuanced interplay of personal and societal factors that mold one's ‘relationship orientation.’ It also overlooks the established legal precedent of safeguarding certain rights not strictly tied to immutability. For instance, religion and marital status, which are not strictly immutable, are both recognized as protected classes under the law.

Learn more about the immutability debates regarding consensual non-monogamy in my latest blog post.

https://medium.com/.schechinger/navigating-fluidity-should-born-this-way-arguments-be-used-in-consensual-non-monogamy-advocacy-e2166a1522d8

12/07/2023

Immutability or ‘born this way’ arguments were central to the LGBTQ legal and social advocacy efforts. Should consensual non-monogamy go the same route? In my most recent blog I delve into the heart of this discourse: Is the nature of CNM immutable and should immutability warrant legal protection?

Check out my latest blog post: ‘Navigating Fluidity: Should ‘Born this Way’ Arguments be used in Consensual Non-monogamy Advocacy Efforts?’ This piece extends the conversation beyond mere choice, addressing the intrinsic tie between relationship orientation and individual identity.

https://medium.com/.schechinger/navigating-fluidity-should-born-this-way-arguments-be-used-in-consensual-non-monogamy-advocacy-e2166a1522d8

In recent years, a profound shift has emerged in the societal understanding and acceptance of diverse relationship structures, encompassing…

11/30/2023

Families, of any structure, are about creating systems of support and care. Recent data from the Census Bureau revealed that less than 18 percent of United States’ households consist of nuclear families with a married couple and children. We’re not only acknowledging the changing dynamics of modern relationships, but we’re also reinforcing the foundational values of stability, love, and support. Listen to my discussion with The Poly (Pod)Cast to hear about the work my colleagues and I are doing to support modern families.

https://open.spotify.com/episode/4LrQJPJaEjYx1jZzhd1fVW