Dr. Cat Meyer, LMFT

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Dr. Cat Meyer, LMFT

Sex and couples therapy viewed from a holistic approach for change. It's my mission to help change To learn more about her work, go to: CatMeyer.com

Dr. Cat Meyer, PsyD, LMFT is a licensed psychotherapist sex therapist, relationship coach, partner yoga for intimacy instructor, meditation guide, and reiki practitioner dedicated to evolving the relationship we have surrounding sexuality. Dr. Cat recognizes the strong link between body, mind, and spirit and uses this knowledge in her private practice, transformational retreats, and speaking events.

02/28/2026

I’ve been the exile in life.
As a girl who couldn’t figure out the unspoken rules.
As a teenager who mimicked others to fit in—and got rejected anyway.
As a young adult on the fringes of every in-group, never quite safe enough to soften.
Exile taught me to believe: isolation is “safe”. Being seen leads to rejection.
Every time it happened, I felt two polarizing sensations:
Relief—I can stop pretending.
And pain—I am unwanted.

Exile doesn’t just hurt. It asks:
Am I real without witnesses? Am I valid in my own existence?
In order to protect us, the unmet wound wraps us with clever solutions:
Shape-shifting to fit the mold of each group
Or build walls so no one can cast you out again—but at the loss of no one truly knowing you.
Now, there is a third place. The “in-between” that is integration.
Meeting yourself in the dark aloneness of yourself and facing what’s there without turning away, but rather finding the depth of understanding and compassion for this part of yourself, when and why it formed.
Discovering that love, warmth, meaning have a source inside you that survives any rejection.
I will be ok on the other side of self aloneness, self revelation, self expression.
The one who descends fully does not return desperate for belonging. They return offering something.
The wound, fully met, becomes the medicine.
And it’s a process. It’s not a single moment of arrival. It’s a spiral—returning to the wound, again and again, each time a little more whole.
Maybe we are always on this journey,
That there is no real point of fixed arrival
Personally I still feel the sensation and seductive pull to protect,
Yet I’m no longer exiling myself to avoid being exiled by others.
And it truly is the greatest sense of power one can wield.

💗Last chance to join my upcoming retreat EXHALE
March 12-15
DM me or click link in my bio
Xoxo 😚

02/26/2026

What if hope isn’t found in checking out…
but in opening wider?

In this clip, Susan Bratton shares how she walked into a room gutted by what’s happening in our world — and left with hope.

Not because the headlines changed.
Not because the chaos disappeared.

But because she experienced a level of connection that reminded her:

We are wired for each other.
We are capable of collective love.
And our bodies hold portals to that remembering.

She speaks about entheogens.
She speaks about org@sm.c 3c.stasy.
She speaks about the kind of connection that dissolves isolation and reveals the web of humanity underneath it all.

This episode is about grief.
And pleasure.
And agency.
And what it means to stay present instead of collapsing.

Hope isn’t bypassing the pain.
It’s expanding your capacity to feel — together.

🎧 Tune into the full episode of S.x Love Psych3delics 179 with Susan Bratton.

🤍 Save this if you’ve been feeling overwhelmed by the state of the world.
💬 Share with someone who needs a reminder that we are more connected than we think

02/25/2026

If she speaks to you in silly voices, babytalk, nonsense words only the two of you understand—
Let her.

This is not immaturity.
This is what safety sounds like.

In the world, she is composed.
Responsible.
Watchful.
Put together.
Always reading the room.
Always managing expectations.
Always holding more than she shows.

But with you— she exhales.
She gets clumsy.
She climbs on you like furniture.
She makes jokes that aren’t even funny.
She becomes dramatic over nothing.
She is soft and strange and unpolished.

This is not her regressing.
This is her trusting you with the most unguarded version of herself.

If you laugh at her rather than WITH her,
if you call it too much, roll your eyes, make her feel foolish for her expressiveness—
She will stop.

She will fold that part of herself into a tiny box and bury it somewhere you’ll never find.

Her light will begin to dim.
Quietly. Slowly.
Until you wonder why the relationship has become so heavy,
Why her l!bido has become so foreign.
Why her affections have become distant.
And the same sparkle in her eye that attracted you to her has faded.

Her playfulness is not a flaw to be fixed.

It’s a gift.

Guard it like the precious thing it is.

02/18/2026

I was making love to my partner. But I couldn’t stay.

Black curtains at the edges of my vision.
A distance from my own body.
Present, but not present.
There, but somewhere else.
And then he stopped.

Not with frustration.
Not with a sigh of annoyance.

He leaned in and whispered: “I don’t know where you’ve gone, but it’s okay. You’re safe. You don’t have to do anything different. I’m here with you.”

And I burst into tears.

I had never had a partner attune to me like that before.
Before, they would push past whatever was happening to get to the end.
Before, there would be judgment—or worse, the self-blame that made me responsible for their wounded sense of self.
Before, I would need to quickly pull myself together, force a resolution, just to preserve the “connection” and keep the peace.

But this was different.

He didn’t need me to be different.
He didn’t need me to explain.
He just stayed.

And something in me that had been clenched for decades began to soften.

This is what I’ve come to understand:
Often, our wounds were created in relationship— a disruption, a betrayal, a moment when someone couldn’t meet us.
So it makes sense that healing happens in relationship too.

Not alone on a meditation cushion.
Not just in a therapist’s office.
But in the alive, messy, vulnerable space between two people who are learning to welcome each other’s parts.

This is what IFS work in partnership looks like:
Both people on the same team.
Both learning their own protections, their own vulnerabilities.
Checking their own parts that mistranslate a reaction as personal to them.
Both building the capacity to meet each other’s tender places with calm.
Curiosity. Patience. Presence.
No agenda to fix or change.

I’m not saying it’s easy. It’s not.
It requires two people willing to do their own work and hold space for the other.

But when we take the time to create this— it’s the most beautiful, restorative, expansive experience.
Everyone benefits.

NOTE: sometimes dissociation isn’t trauma related. See my post: it’s not always trauma for more insight.

02/13/2026

My favorite Valentines gift is clear communication of desires 💘😌

02/12/2026

Finding space for grief and pleasure.
If we only stay in the heaviness— the pain, the anger, the fear— without inviting in expansion,
we will slowly deteriorate.

Grief clears space.
But pleasure is what fills us back up.
We tell ourselves:
I can’t feel good while I’m grieving.
Joy would betray the pain.

But pleasure isn’t betrayal.
It’s medicine.

Pleasure activates ventral vagal—safety, connection, openness.
It lowers cortisol.
Releases oxytocin.
Reduces inflammation.
It builds capacity to hold hard things without breaking.

Grief and pleasure are dance partners.
One clears.
One restores.
One deepens.
One softens.
Both essential.
Neither abandoned.

You are allowed to grieve and still let yourself feel good.
That’s not betrayal.
That’s how you stay whole while you heal.

02/09/2026

When I work with women, I hear the same thing over and over:
“I should be over this by now.” “Why can’t I just be present?” “What’s wrong with me?”

They’re irritated with their bodies for “not doing what they want them to do.”

They want to be present—truly, desperately—but they can’t understand why they keep leaving.
Why they feel flat.
Why they dissociate during intimacy.
Why shame keeps showing up uninvited.

They tell me about how much therapy they’ve done. How safe their current partner is. How happy they are with the rest of their lives.
And yet. They still check out during s—x.

WTF?

I get it. Because that was me.

Years ago, I was working with a therapist who was truly brilliant. But he kept pointing to my extreme fatigue and sadness as “parts” I still needed to heal and integrate.
So we did the work. A lot of it.

And there were parts—formed in childhood, familiar with exhaustion, familiar with leaving. I got to know them. Befriend them.
And still. I was dissociating.

Years into therapy, we discovered toxic mold in my house. Mold that had been quietly wrecking my hormones the entire time.

That discovery cracked something open for me.
I started to understand: Sometimes the root isn’t a memory that needs processing. It’s a body that needs replenishing.

If you’ve done the inner work and you’re still leaving your body— it might be time to look at what else is running in the background.

Hormones. Nervous system depletion. Functional freeze. Nutritional deficiencies.

Not instead of therapy or relationship to parts or trauma work—in addition to.

Healing isn’t one road.
And presence requires more than just processing.
It requires a body resourced enough to stay.

Read about the 4 causes in the carousel ↴

⭐️ Did you have an experience similar?
⭐️ Got anything to add or share?

02/07/2026

So many women carry quiet shame in their bodies.

In this clip, I’m joined by Suzannah Weiss as we talk about how pain, unmet expectations, and systemic limits can turn into self-blame especially around childbirth, bre.astfeeding, and women’s bodies.

When someone can’t bre.astfeed.
When birth isn’t what they hoped for.
When pleasure feels out of reach.

It’s easy for the story to become: my body failed me.

But the truth is more complex and more compassionate. Knowing what’s possible can be empowering, and it can create pressure when those options aren’t accessible, safe, or realistic. Many of the limits women face aren’t personal at all. They’re systemic. They’re structural. And they’re beyond individual control.

You didn’t fail.
Your body isn’t broken.
And honoring your experience matters as much as imagining what’s possible.

🎧 Listen to Episode 178 of S.x Love Psych3delics for the full conversation on pain, pleasure, and releasing shame from the body.

🤍 Save this if you’ve ever blamed yourself for something that wasn’t your fault.
💬 Share with someone who needs gentleness today.

02/05/2026

What if there was no clock on pleasure?

In this clip, Suzannah Weiss and I talk about the pressure women feel to reach org^&m quickly, or at all—and how that pressure can actually shut pleasure down.

When you’re rushed, comparing yourself, or chasing a goal, the body tightens. Stress replaces curiosity. And suddenly pleasure feels far away. The truth is, there is no standard timeline. No benchmark you need to meet. And you’re not broken if or**sm is challenging, inconsistent, or unavailable at times.

Pleasure thrives in safety, patience, and permission, not performance.

🎧 Be sure to tune into the full episode of S.x Love Psych3delics 178 with Suzannah Weiss

🤍 Save this if you’ve ever felt rushed in your body.
💬 Share with someone who needs permission to slow down.

02/03/2026

Ero.t!c Innocence
Is the experience of coming back to the innate truth that our sensing, s- xual, embodied essence is our natural state of being.
It is an innocent expression of our bodies in pleasure,
In play,
In exploration
No shame. No fear.
No agenda to “accomplish” or reach an outcome.
No performance for the looks or aesthetic.
No intent to take, exploit, preserve one’s safety in exchange for another’s.

The horrid truth about our society is that innocence can leave us vulnerable if we haven’t the resources or development of power in our own protection and discernment, yet.

The times I felt so free in my own ero.tic!sm were the times I felt so safe.
In my own lifetime, due to multiple violations and SA as a child and young adult,
That safety and the discernment of who and what contributed to it had to be relearned.

There may be a part of us starving for innocence again and as a result overrides the discernment of those we are inviting to be involved, contributing to the absence of safety in a space.

There may be a part of us starving for safety again and as a result creates rigidity, contributing to the absence of pleasure and exploration.

And there may be a dance of polarization between these parts. One pulling in the direction of safety and the other pulling in the direction of freedom, leaving us in lockstep.

The work that I do in my retreats is locating and developing a relationship with these parts.
Not necessarily getting rid of one to favor the other—in the world we live in, they are both necessary.
The task is learning to tune into their message, recognize their own perspectives + wisdom, and recognize what they need from us in these circumstances.
It can be quiet and nuanced—this is where the translation can become challenging.
What does the information I’m sensing mean?
Developing intuition is a skill in listening.

My upcoming retreat EXHALE is happening in March in Malibu.
DM me if you are feeling the desire to join.

01/29/2026

In this short clip, I sit down with Suzannah Weiss to explore how women are conditioned to endure discomfort, stay quiet about pain, and accept suffering as “normal”, especially in our bodies, our s3*uality, and our health.

We talk about chronic pain, medical dismissal, l.bido shifts, and the cultural myths that tell us to ignore our symptoms and keep going. When we stop ignoring it, pain becomes information, not something to push through, but something asking for care and attention.✨

🎧 Be sure to tune into the full episode of S.x Love Psych3delics 178 with Suzannah Weiss.

10/31/2025

Next thing you know, Gramma has this sitting on the mantle.
Who tells her? 🤓

Happy Halloween, lovers 👻

Address

152 S Lasky
Beverly Hills, CA
90212

Website

http://www.sexloveyoga.com/

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