Nicole Lee Rocha, LMHC, LLC

08/14/2025

Neural Nostalgia. 🎼

Ever notice listening to our old playlists feels different than listening to the others?

Neural Nostalgia
refers to music we listened to from our teenage and young adult years
being closely tied to memories
and emotional connections.

This is one of the most powerful links 🧠our brain has between music and memories.

Mental health benefits include
🎧supporting mood
🎧reducing emotional and physical pain
🎧memory retrival, including for those who have repressed memories or dementia 😮

Here’s your emotional wellness reminder to
Turn up that old playlist 💿🎧🎼

05/14/2025

Mother’s Day. 🖤

If you survived it this year and carried both loss and love, I see you Friend. 🖤

This one’s for all those who survived Mother’s Day, and did our best to
Sit with loss,
Feel our grief,
Acknowledge what we didn’t have or
what could have been;
All while doing our best to
Connect to hope,
Recognize Gratitude,
Encourage Healing, and
Break Trauma Cycles so the pain ends with Us.

Happy Mother’s Day Friend.
You are Incredible.
You are Remarkable.
You are Enough. ❤️

To the broken hearted daughter who has never known her mom: May today be a day for you to grieve and know your pain matters. May that grief bring lasting and deep peace.

To the angry son, who has cut himself off because loving his mom made his life unpredictable: May you find the tenderness that young boy needed long ago. May that tenderness remind you, the little boy in you deserves love.

To the young mom, who is afraid of repeating the cycle: In your stillness, may you find each day a gift to give differently than what you got. May you enjoy the results for many years to come.

To the adult kids of an abusive mother: May you find peace for your heartache and protection from all the things people say when they are afraid of your story.

To the heavy hearted child who tried and it was never enough: May you resign from what takes and never gives back. May you rest in your enoughness.

To the many who are spending their first year without the mom they loved–may her memories, her gifts, be honored and held, so they spread to those she left behind.

To the mothers who did some hurting, and aren’t sure how to repair: May you find the words to comfort that younger mother in you, to hold her close, to let her breathe and know your love.

To all who need healing from Mother’s Day: May you see things for what they are, and what they are not. May this day be what you need to heal and find peace on your terms.

I’m so glad you’re here.

***Registration for online group @ Linktr.ee/natepost 🫶🫶

05/06/2025

“The Helper”

If we identify as being a
🖤helper,
🖤rescuer,
🖤caretaker,

Asking for help and support can be an extremely challenging task and a difficult change to initiate.

🤔Let’s talk why.
This pattern likely developed all the way back during our childhood. Many of us were parentified children It’s likely we may have grown up with emotionally immature parents who did not regulate their own emotions It’s likely we lived in spaces where we were expected to manage others’ emotions It’s likely we’ve lived with someone who needed extra care, thus resulting in neglect of our own needs (this could look like a chronically ill parent, or a special needs sibling)

Through these experiences,
we learned to
💔rely solely on ourselves,
💔minimize our needs,
💔Not ask for help

☺️Let’s be mindful: Begining this change and trying to ask for help, offers us reassurance that we are trying to heal and living in a safe space to do so.

Little by little Friends.
Happy Healing ❤️‍🩹

"The Helper" Asking For Help

04/07/2025

🖤Boundaries within Unsafe Relationships.🖤

We encounter this most within Families. 💔
Families have some of the strongest bonds and ties, despite

Dysfunction,
Abuse,
Neglect,
Mistreatment,
Disrespect,
Manipulation,
Triangulation,

And on and on.

The thing is,
Our boundaries are ours and ours alone to navigate and decide for ourselves. 🤔

If you currently maintain a connection with someone where the relationship does not feel entirely safe,

You are not alone Friend.❤️

❤️No judgment here.❤️
You are navigating a decision
that in an ideal world
You should have never been put in at all.

This boundary is yours
to keep,
change,
end, and
change again
whenever and however you feel works best for you.

Just remember: If someone ever puts us in a position where the choice becomes ourselves or them, not both collectively;

Let’s ask ourselves: would we ever intentionally do that to someone else?

I didn’t think so.

Keep going. Keep healing Friends ❤️

Love And Space Dust.

03/06/2025

This one’s for the
❤️ Empaths,
❤️ Rescuers,
❤️ Caregivers,
❤️ Heros,
And all the Survivors of Childhood Trauma,

Here’s you gentle reminder that just because we’re used to taking care of;
Good at taking care of,
this doesn’t necessarily mean we should be taking care of everyone in our lives.

💔This is quite common for those of us who survived complex childhood trauma,
and also identify as being one of the archetypes above.

The combo makes it simple for our brain to recognize when to slip back into that caretaking role, regardless of if this is healthy for us or not. 💔

🤔Why does this happen?
This pattern was a survival skill years ago during our childhood.
💣Survival skills register as highest priority
over want, and basic needs.
After all, they help us
🖤 survive 🖤

A healthy boundary might look like:
We refrain from assuming emotional responsibility and care for
🖤 Our Parents,
🖤 Partners,
🖤 Close Friends & Family

❤️We work to encourage and support our Young Children and Fur Babes to manage their own emotional needs and wellness.

❤️We are solely responsible for taking accountability for our own Emotional Wellness & Our Mood—no one else’s.

Happy Healing Friends ❤️

.trauma.educator

02/19/2025

Confidence 💪🏻vs. Seeking External Approval. 💔

While hearing external feedback from others may feel nice, it’s only that: external feedback.

Compliments might feel good to receive in the moment, but we don’t want to rely solely on external feedback to dictate how we feel about ourselves. This regular practice is highly linked to codependency. 🖤

Instead, when we practice
😌Self-Acceptance,
🥰Self-Love,
😁Self-Confidence,
That belongs solely to us, and doesn’t change depending on external feedback (positive or negative)

❤️With practice, true confidence & self-love becomes easier and easier;
we believe in ourselves and our self-worth.

☝️Let’s put it to practice:
We can begin our mornings 🌇with
three specific things about ourselves
we like or love.
We want to make sure these include all sorts of aspects of us,
ranging from
❤️personality,
❤️values,
❤️morals,
❤️beliefs,
❤️physical attributes.

Our goal is to make each day different from the last. 🤗

When we are the source of our own love, no one can take that away from us ❤️

Happy Healing Friends 🌅

True confidence is a game changer. ❤️‍🩹

Imagine walking into any situation without fear of judgment or second-guessing yourself—it’s one of the most powerful traits you can cultivate. 🙌

What does confidence look like for you? Be unstoppable! 💪❤️

02/12/2025

“How are you?”🤔

But, for real.

“How are you?”
Is often answered by many of us a bit
🖤disingenuously,
🖤Often to support a boundary & not overstare;
🖤Often to avoid discomfort;
🖤Often due to social pressures & expactations.

And here’s your gentle reminder, that while some of these “protective” & untrue responses may still exist within certain social settings & with surface level acquaintances,
❤️We also want to answer honestly,
❤️truly,
❤️vulnerably within the close relationships that are safe and supportive.

The ones who love us, don’t need us to pretend. 🪄The ones who love us want to know if we’re not ok, so they can help ❤️

So here’s your gentle nudge to circle back around to those safe encouraging relationships, and answer with honesty and bravery ❤️

“How are you (but for real)?” 😌

Sometimes “I’m good” is just easier. ~ Mandy

01/31/2025

Tragedy & Grief.

This one feels appropriate given recent events. 💔
Here’s Our Reminder of how to reset, refocus, and care gently for ourselves.

❤️ lean into hard feelings.
➡️ label them (sorrow, grief, furry, disgust)
➡️ offer narrative: “I feel X because X.”
➡️ ask where and what are these feelings in our body? (I feel tightness in my stomach)

❤️ Take Control Inventory: ask what is within and outside of my control?
➡️encourage redirection toward what is within our control
➡️ ask how do I want to proceed? What’s my next best action?

❤️limit access to connectedness, limit access to new info
➡️many of us stay so connected due to anxiety we will miss a new development. The reality is, staying completely connected at all times contributes to worse anxiety symptoms, feelings of lack of control.
➡️ define timeframes where we can connect and access info, as well as times to disconnect

❤️Continue doing things we love
➡️supports self-regulation, reduces anxiety, promotes grounding
➡️reminds us we matter
➡️reminds us we deserve self-love, self-compassion

Take Care Friends. ❤️

@corymuscara

01/21/2025

Being Gentle with Ourselves. ❤️

While we’re in the midst of our emotional healing journey, many of us still find it easier to be
🖤hyper-critical,
🖤judgmental,
🖤expect perfection
From Ourselves;

Versus offer Kindness.

Here’s our daily Reminder: If we only have 50% and offer that entire 50%, we in fact have given 100%. ❤️

Today, let’s commit to practicing self-kindness and self-acceptance.🌅

We are Enough, Friends

Tiny Buddha

01/09/2025

Healing Our Inner-Child thru Creating.🎨🎶

Complex (long-term/ ongoing) childhood trauma removes our ability to be a true child. 💔

Instead ofexploringbeing curioustrying new thingscreating,

🚨We instead need to stay in a constant place of fight or flight in order to stay safe.
This often includes…
💔 maintaining hypervigelance
💔 trying to always be small & hidden
💔 trying to be perfect /make no mistakes
💔 trying to anticipate the mood, need, wants of caregivers or abusers

❤️Healing Our Inner-Child in Adulthood includes doing things we love. ❤️

Did you know it’s common for trauma childhood survivors not to know what we enjoy doing?

This makes sense because the opportunity for exploration never existed at all. 🖤

Healing now in adulthood includes
❤️exploring
❤️creating
❤️finding what our joy looks like

While allowing our nervous system to finally rest and shut down our fight or flight.

If we’re doing trauma work, we have grown into adults that would have protected us as children.

Keep Creating Friends ❤️

12/30/2024

Anxiety connected to Lack of Control. 🖤

While many of us understand anxiety,
including our own anxiety patterns,
once experiencing anxious thoughts and feelings,
it can be tricky to step outside of that anxious cycle to effectively support ourselves.

Taking a ✋Control Inventory ✋allows us to check in around what we do and do not have control over.

Control Inventories can encourage us to think about parts of topics and actions that are within our own control.🤔

Control Inventories can remind us to do our best to release concerns that are outside of our control. 😌

Here’s a Quick Example…
Anxious Thought Topic: The world can be a difficult and unkind place, where many minorities experience prejudice and bigotry. 🤯

✋Let’s take our Control Inventory…
❤️1. Ask ourselves what part of this is OUTSIDE of my control?
➡️this being a (huge) world problem
➡️others’ actions
➡️others’ beliefs
➡️others’ lack of information, lack of understanding of different minorities, communities, ethnic backgrounds, traditions, etc.

❤️2. Ask ourselves what is WITHIN my control here?
➡️ how I treat others: practicing kindness and compassion
➡️ my personal values: inclusion, understanding, learning, empathy

❤️3. Ask ourselves: based on what is within our control, is there something we want to take ACTION on to reduce our anxiety or distress?
➡️we could be an advocate
➡️we could be an educator and encourage understanding and acceptance
➡️Talk about this issue/ conversation, social media, blog posts
➡️fundraising, donating, community involvement

This anxious topic could have become so much worse in our mind—we know it’s easy to spiral 🌪️downward on issues that contribute to lots of distress for each of us.

Have you practiced taking a Control Inventory today? 🤔

Happy Healing Friends ❤️

12/17/2024

🖤Grief during the Holidays. 🌲

Grief thru the Holidays can weigh heavy on our 🖤hearts when we’ve lost a loved one someone who spent our holidays with us previously.

Loss and Grief can look like:
💔 loss by death
💔 loss by ending a relationship
💔 loss by estrangement
💔 loss of our furbabes
💔 Loss by miscarriage, abortion, still-birth
💔 loss by loved ones not emotionally well / not fully present (both physically present and emotionally)
💔 loss by loved one having declining chronic health condition (includes precipitory grief)

🌲If Our Holiday Season includes any form of Grief, our goal is to be gentle and offer permission to ourselves.

Permission can look like:
❤️I give myself permission to commit to what I can this holiday season; not to pressure myself to do what feels like too much
❤️I give myself permission to ugly cry
❤️I give myself permission for additional necessary boundaries because of my grief journey this holiday season
❤️I give myself permission to spend my holiday doing what feels best to me, not pressure myself to adhere to holiday norms or others’ expectations
❤️I give myself permission to have more needs during the holiday season because of my grief

If you’re finding yourself in the midst of grief this Holiday Season, You’re not alone, Friend. 🧑‍🧑‍🧒‍🧒🧑‍🧑‍🧒🧑‍🧒‍🧒🧑‍🧒

Lets be gentle with ourselves, and offer compassion and permission ❤️