Co-Parenting Solutions, LLC

09/09/2025

This picture explains it all…

08/21/2025

Lately, I have seen so much of this in my work, where I have had to point out to others that what they may view as “crazy” can sometimes truly be the impact of true Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder from living with an abuser. This does not just apply to women, as I have seen plenty of male victims of abuse as well. There is nothing worse than when a person survives abuse, and then is gaslighted by the very people that they need support from - just because the abuser comes across as the calm narrator of the story. It is our job as professionals in the family law field to dig deeper into the story and find out where the behaviors stem from because trauma can impact the nervous system in ways one cannot imagine unless they have been through it themselves, and we all need to look deeply and carefully at each situation.

**Sometimes that crazy ex-girlfriend who’s acting PSYCHO is really the victim telling the truth about her abuser.**

Society loves to slap labels on women—*crazy, jealous, bitter, unstable.* It’s an easy way to dismiss her pain without ever asking what she’s been through. But behind the name-calling, behind the rolled eyes and whispered gossip, there is often a very different story—one of abuse, betrayal, and trauma.

When someone escapes a toxic, narcissistic relationship, they often carry deep emotional wounds. The gaslighting, lies, infidelity, manipulation, and cruelty leave scars that don’t just disappear the moment the relationship ends. Instead, the victim may appear emotional, angry, or “obsessed,” not because they’re unstable, but because they’re trying desperately to be heard, to be believed, and to make sense of the chaos they endured.

Meanwhile, the narcissist is usually calm, charming, and collected in public. They paint themselves as the reasonable one, the victim of a “hysterical” or “crazy” ex. They smear her reputation, telling anyone who will listen that she’s unstable or obsessed with them. This tactic—known as the smear campaign—is one of the narcissist’s favorite weapons. It deflects attention from their own abusive behavior and shifts all blame onto the survivor.

What people often don’t realize is that the so-called “crazy ex” is reacting to very real trauma. She may be speaking out because she’s tired of being silenced. She may be emotional because she was lied to, cheated on, degraded, or abandoned. She may appear relentless because she is fighting for truth in a world that has been twisted against her.

It’s important to understand that her intensity is not proof of her instability—it’s evidence of the abuse she’s endured. A person can only hold in betrayal and pain for so long before it erupts. And when it does, it often doesn’t look “pretty” or “composed.” But that doesn’t mean it isn’t valid.

So the next time someone calls an ex “crazy,” pause before believing it. Ask yourself who benefits from that label. More often than not, the one calling her crazy is the very person who drove her to the breaking point. Sometimes, the so-called psycho is actually the survivor—and the only crazy thing about her is that she dared to tell the truth.

06/27/2025

Sound familiar to anyone? Read the book “The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist” by Debbie Mirza! It will open your eyes and help you heal!

**Life With A Covert Narcissist**

You will enter the relationship thinking they love you, because they call you their soulmate and best friend. They’ll mirror your values, likes, and passions. In the beginning, you’ll feel seen in a way you never have before. They’ll say all the right things and behave like the perfect partner. They’ll listen attentively, shower you with affection, and make grand promises about your future together. It feels magical — like fate. You’ll believe you’ve found someone who truly understands you.

But over time, subtle shifts begin. They’ll start to criticize things about you that are intrinsic to your identity — how you laugh, your tone of voice, your hobbies, your friendships. These won’t be blatant insults, but backhanded compliments and comments framed as “helpful suggestions” or “just being honest.” You'll begin to feel confused, like you're constantly doing something wrong. They’ll start pulling away emotionally, withholding affection or conversation, only to come back later with a gift, compliments, or an apology — just enough to reel you back in and keep you doubting your intuition.

You’ll start questioning yourself constantly. “Maybe I *am* overreacting.” “Maybe I *am* too sensitive.” They’ll use your empathy against you, guilt-tripping you for being upset. The relationship becomes a cycle of emotional highs and crushing lows. They will manufacture chaos, and then act like the calm savior when you’re breaking down. The psychological manipulation is relentless — they distort reality, deny things they said, and shift blame every time conflict arises.

Your self-worth begins to erode. You may isolate yourself from others because you're tired of trying to explain what’s happening. Friends and family may not understand — after all, the narcissist is so “kind” and “charming” in public. But behind closed doors, you're walking on eggshells. You dread their moods, their silences, their cold stares. You apologize just to keep the peace. You begin to feel physically ill — anxiety, insomnia, even chronic pain — because your body can’t take the emotional toll.

Conversations become circular. You try to express how you feel, but it always turns into how *you* hurt *them*. You’ll be accused of things you never did, and when you defend yourself, you’re told you’re “too defensive.” Every discussion becomes a trap.

Eventually, you look at the person you once loved and feel nothing but confusion, sorrow, and fear. The mask slips completely, and you realize: they were never who they said they were. You've been in love with a carefully constructed illusion — and now, you’re left to rebuild yourself piece by piece.

06/25/2025

Great article!

I’ve been thinking a lot about what equal parenting time means with regard to divorce. Does equal parenting time mean equal parents?

06/04/2025

Co-parenting is no picnic. I should know; I have been doing it for going on five years now. I also know that the learning curve is pretty steep and the stress of figuring out a separation or divorce is enormous. Naturally, it’s a very emotionally charged event when you and the person you share chi...

05/30/2025

Here is my latest blog on an interesting topic - what do you do when you are pressured by family members to fight for more Parenting Time, but you know you are not going to be a more involved parent? Is that fair to your child or your Co-Parent? Relationships between your child and extended family is a high priority but find out why what you are doing may be hurtful to your child and your Co-Parenting relationship and find strategies for a better balance.

Spread the loveIn Co-Parenting Facilitation, sometimes I meet with parents where one has always been hands-on and involved with the kids, and the other parent has not shown much interest in their child. That’s sad enough for the child, but the parent who lacks interest usually hasn’t pursued a p...

05/27/2025

Check out my latest article on irooze.com - “Co-Parenting After Broken Trust: How to Keep Your Kids First After the Affair”

https://www.irooze.com/divorce-articles/parenting-after-broken-trust-how-to-keep-your-kids-first-after-the-affair

05/12/2025

Very excited to have my first article written for the Irooze Divorce Community posted! Check out my article that gives concrete tools about ways to handle role transitions parents undergo post-divorce and how to avoid feeling threatened and undermined! Ravit Rose 🌹 Everything Divorce
Jordana Wolfson, LMSW, M.A., Ed. Sp.


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03/23/2025

What can you do when everyone tells you that your Co-Parent cannot be held accountable for inappropriate behaviors that hurt the Co-Parenting dynamic and ultimately the children? Check out my latest blog for tips and tricks!

Spread the loveIn Co-Parenting Facilitation, there are people I refer to as UTR—Under the Radar. That’s because the things they do to knock their co-parent off track are troubling and not nice, but not significant enough (or provable) for a court to take action. That doesn’t mean they aren’t...

01/30/2025

Exciting Update! In a few weeks, I will be adding a new title to my professional trainings: Life Coach! I have been spending the year working on my Life Coaching training through the Center for Coach Development accredited through the International Coach Federation and I am honored to have the opportunity to help train a new cohort of future Life Coaches/Social Workers at Bar Ilan University in Israel starting in February! Love learning and growing in new ways!

Spread the loveIn my line of work, you can never have enough training. At least, that’s my perspective, and it’s why I’ve earned certifications as a Licensed Master’s Social Worker, earned a Master’s degree in Educational Administration and Leadership, and became trained as a Collaborativ....

12/08/2024

Check out my latest blog - it is never easy Co-Parenting with someone that has a High Conflict Personality, but I offer some tips and strategies to help!

Spread the lovePeople are fond of invoking the n-word in Co-Parenting counseling sessions. The n-word I’m talking about is narcissist, and it’s usually an accusation lobbed at one’s difficult or high-conflict ex. And while there are definitely situations where a former spouse may well be narc....

10/31/2024

Whether you are a recently divorced or separated co-parent, transitioning from a one-household family to a two-home family can be overwhelming for both adults and children. During this time, look for ways to show the kids that Mom and Dad are both still here for them. Believe it or not, Halloween...