Tanya Harding Counseling, PLLC

08/16/2025

Thought-action fusion is a hallmark of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD). What is thought-action fusion, you may ask? The belief that because one thinks it possible, it actually is probable. For instance: "maybe I offended them", "what if I just contracted a deadly virus", "what if I forgot to lock the door", "what if I am being punished by God", "what if I am not meant to be in a relationship", and the list goes on. These thoughts are also unwanted, and often seen as intrusive, and not in alignment with the person. For instance, does the person concerned with offending someone really desire to do so, or the person who is worried about not being meant to be in a relationship really want to be alone? The answer is always no if the anxiety is due to OCD; these thoughts/doubts/worries do not align with who the person is at the core.

Though all manner of things are abstractly possible, it does not warrant anxiety if there is no "real" (here and now evidence of) threat. I want to normalize anxiety as a protective biological experience present to alert us to danger. This does not mean that being overly anxious is adaptive, nor considering remote possibilities as truth; in fact, to anyone experiencing an anxiety disorder, it is mentally exhausting. It can be detrimental to one's health, relationships, social functioning, schooling, and employment.

OCD thinking is different from the general population and from those who experience a general anxiety disorder. There is a trigger, doubt, consequence if doubt is true, anxiety, followed by either a mental or physical act to reduce the anxiety, and this is known as a compulsion (the compulsion can be simply ruminating over and over and over). The action to reduce the anxiety, ie the compulsion, is not the problem per se. In fact, the problem is in the story behind the compulsion; the doubt.

So, how does one get the thought "bully" under control? Well, OCD would tell you, engage in a compulsion like "let's just think about this a little more" (rumination), or "let's check in and ask" (checking), or "maybe we should avoid the grocery store, or not fly" (avoidance), or "maybe I will dig a little deeper" (research), or when it gets too uncomfortable, or anxiety provoking, a panic attack or lashing out may even ensue.

The deeper you go into the OCD bubble/spiral, the harder it is to get back to reality. OCD happens inside of thoughts in rapid fire succession until one is living inside of the imagination wherein the story takes place. Despite it telling you something is possible, there is NEVER any concrete here and now (five senses and common sense) evidence to suggest this is probable. Remote possibilities, and inferential confusion create the narrative, not reality.

Uncertainty is a part of life, but there are things we can be certain of in the here and now, and following that thread, rather than "what is possible" is where the journey begins. Discomfort and anxiety are also part of life, and it is important to be able to tolerate both, but you do not have to give the story credibility by relying on information that occurs abstractly.

If you or someone you know is struggling with anxiety which seems uncontrollable, and even maybe affects several areas of your life, it's worth considering OCD as the root. You do not have to suffer alone...if I can't help, I can help you find someone who can. 828-463-3083 or

Discover compassionate therapy services with Tanya Harding, MS, LCMHCA, specializing in EMDR, HeartMath®, anxiety, depression, and trauma support in Candler, NC and online.

08/05/2025

**MENTAL HEALTH MONDAY**
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder is characterized by obsessions (intrusive, thoughts, images, sensations, or words which are unwanted/ego-dystonic) while compulsions are defined by any physical act or mental act serving to decrease anxiety or discomfort from the obsessional intrusion.

In relationship OCD, it affects perceived partner flaws, and the relationship itself. A person can become bogged down by the constant obsessional doubt of "is this partner the one, maybe I don't belong in a relationship at all, what if I make a mistake and choose the wrong partner?" Additionally, it can attack the partner, "this is not the type of person I want to be with because look how inconsiderate they are." Characteristic of all OCD subtypes is the fact that it is ego-dystonic, meaning the obsessional rumination, doubt, worry, or aka possibility is misaligned with reality (the five senses and common sense).

Relationship OCD will settle in where there is no real problem, there is no desire to be alone, and in fact, when the person believes this is actually who they would like to be with, and they love and value the person. OCD chooses a narrative that defies reality, it uses abstract facts, general rules, hearsay, personal experiences (from other places and other times that are slightly different than the here and now), the fact that "it's possible...anything is possible" to convince you and derail you from truth and the facts which are true in the here and now.

Relationship OCD is complex and nuanced, and clinically speaking difficult to decipher. Afterall, relationships are challenging and people have needs and often they go unmet. How do you truly determine if it's just an unmet need, or if is it ROCD? If you are struggling in this area, please reach out, and if I can't help you for whatever reason, I am happy to help you find someone who can. Below the citation is the link to my website. Don't struggle in silence!!

Tinella, L., Lunardi, L., Rigobello, L., Bosco, A., & Mancini, F. (2023). Relationship Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (R-OCD): The role of relationship duration, fear of guilt, and personality traits. Journal of Obsessive-Compulsive and Related Disorders, 37, 100801. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jocrd.2023.100801

www.tanyahardingcounseling.com

Discover compassionate therapy services with Tanya Harding, MS, LCMHCA, specializing in EMDR, HeartMath®, anxiety, depression, and trauma support in Candler, NC and online.

07/22/2025

I often hear clients say, "I wish I had known sooner that what I have been dealing with is OCD". The fact is that recent research suggests there is a significant time delay from first symptom onset to diagnosis and treatment of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (Ziegler et al., 2021). Urban myth suggests that if you have OCD, you have issues with being extremely tidy, or with germs or washing your hands raw, and though this may be true for some, it is not for all, and OCD attacks what you are most fearful of and vulnerable to.

In fact, if you are not concerned about orderliness or contamination or germs, either of the two compulsions listed above would not show up. Many suffer from a fear of harming themselves or others, that they may somehow be a bad person, or not capable of a relationship, or even being loved. These examples are just some of many many ways in which OCD can show up.

One thing that all sufferers of OCD have in common is the distinct way in which their thoughts unfold, and the distress they feel not being able to get out of the endless cycle of trigger, doubt, fear of what will happen if that doubt comes true, the anxiety and discomfort that builds until finally they engage in some act (mental or physical) to temporarily reduce that anxiety or discomfort. Therefore, proper diagnosis and treatment are essential. True relief is possible when we understand the narrative behind what is happening.

If you or someone you know is suffering from constant anxiety, and even potentially debilitating anxiety, it is worth considering the idea, that it might actually be OCD. Under the citation, I have included my website link wherein you can get a glimpse of what I offer. If I cannot help for whatever reason, I can help you find someone who can.

Ziegler, S., Bednasch, K., Baldofski, S., & Rummel-Kluge, C. (2021). Long durations from symptom onset to diagnosis and from diagnosis to treatment in obsessive-compulsive disorder: A retrospective self-report study. PLOS ONE, 16(12), e0261169. https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0261169

www.tanyahardingcounseling.com

Discover compassionate therapy services with Tanya Harding, MS, LCMHCA, specializing in EMDR, HeartMath®, anxiety, depression, and trauma support in Candler, NC and online.

01/06/2025

05/22/2023

I have had incredible success: "profound calming of anxiety" with use of and teaching HeartMath techniques in sessions with clients. If you are interested please read a little more on my website:

Change is Possible Psychotherapy & EMDR sessions in Candler, NC Learn more Hi, I’m Tanya! I’m a Candler based LCMHCA who loves guiding people through the healing process. If you are feeling stuck, confused, lost or going through a change I can help navigate the emotional ups and downs. People se...

05/19/2023

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04/04/2023

Stress affects people physically, mentally and emotionally. According to the American Institute of Stress, up to 90% of all health problems are related to stress. Too much stress can contribute to and agitate many health problems, including heart disease, high blood pressure, stroke, depression and sleep disorders. How stressed are you? Everyone responds to stress differently. Take this quick test to see if you are experiencing stress. The items you check will reveal how much stress is affecting your life.
❏ I feel overly tired or fatigued.
❏ I often am nervous, anxious or depressed.
❏ I have sleep problems.
❏ I have repeated headaches or minor aches and pains.
❏ I worry about my job, finances, relationships.

Emotions, or feelings have a powerful impact on the human body. Positive emotions like appreciation, care and love not only feel good, they are good for you. They help your body’s systems synchronize and work better, as a well-tuned car. Research at the Institute of HeartMath has shown that when you intentionally shift to a positive emotion, heart rhythms immediately change. This shift in heart rhythms creates a favorable cascade of neural, hormonal and biochemical events that benefit the entire body. The effects are both immediate and long lasting.

I will be hosting a 4 session Heart Math class on Tuesdays from 12:00 - 1:30 pm for the month of May. Learn tools to alleviate your stress, and increase your coherence.

04/03/2023

When you’re stressed, your body is out of sync. Negative/depleting emotions we feel when stressed such as anger, frustration, anxiety and worry lead to increased disorder in heart rhythms and the nervous system. In contrast, positive/renewing emotions like joy, appreciation, care and kindness create harmony in heart rhythms and the nervous system. Other bodily systems sync up to this rhythm, a process scientists call coherence. Because coherence leads to more mental clarity, creativity and better problem-solving abilities, it’s easier to find solutions and better ways of handling stressful situations.