Michael Flood Counseling & Testing Services

08/11/2025

We Are All from the Same Dust

We are all from the same dust; you'd think we would see and interpret events in the same way.

Fortunately, we don't - because our differences challenge our beliefs and the ways we make sense
of the world. These challenges don't necessarily mean you were wrong; rather, they can be used as
tools for gaining deeper insight.

"Even if you don't agree, these moments broaden your understanding that will serve you in future
experiences"

Let me illustrate.
You're driving along the interstate and get a flat tire. You don't know how to change it. Here lies the
experience - you need to get somewhere, but you can't because of the flat tire. You call a friend for
help. As they change the tire, you watch, and in that moment you learn how to do it yourself.
But that's not the only lesson. You also learn that when you need help, it's okay to ask - and that being specific about what you need makes it more likely you'll get the right help. You discover that you've become a better communicator.
You also realize helping others can be an incredibly positive experience
Yes, in this case you were the one receiving help, but maybe you also learn the value of sacrificing
personal time to help someone else. And who cares? You do.

"Life becomes increasingly meaningless if you remain content with 'status quo'."
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The Takeaway
Don't run from or shut down experiences you dislike - unless they're abusive. Instead:

STOP.
STEP BACK.
BREATHE.
REPROCESS.

Often, our first response with negative experiences comes from an emotional mind rather than a logical or reasoning mind. That's rarely helpful.

Here's how to regain control of the only thing you
can truly control - yourself:
1. STOP engaging in the conflict.
2. STEP BACK physically and/or mentally.
3. BREATHE.
4. REPROCESS.
After these steps go back with a logical reasoni g mind and reevaluate the situation and attempt to find a more neutral or positive interpretation rather than allowing yourself to be stuck with those negative destructive thoughts taking valuable head space When emotions run high, your heart rate increases and blood rushes to your organs and muscles to prepare for
fight or flight. That oxygen has to come from somewhere, and often it's drawn from the brain - reducing your ability to think clearly. This is why emotionally charged arguments rarely resolve with logic.
Once your breathing returns to normal and oxygen is flowing back to the brain, then bring in your logic or reasoning. This helps you accept that some disagreements will never be resolved - and learning to be okay with that result.
You can hold your beliefs and still allow others to walk away unconvinced, just as you remain unconvinced by them.
“Differences dont have to be interpreted as measures of your worth and value It merely reflects their belief system which is born out of their life experiences.”
We don't have to see eye to eye to have peaceful, productive encounters, but we do need grace. Grace comes from stepping back, thinking clearly, and accepting a 'No' or 'You're
wrong' without hostility.
And yes - maybe they're right. Or maybe you are. But does every disagreement need to be settled?
I don't think so (admittedly this is an overly generalized and simplified point). Trying to change someone's mind often costs more time and energy than it's worth, especially when the outcome doesn't add value to your life.
That's not defeat - it's self-preservation. My goal is to enjoy the time I have, not to convince the
world of what is good or bad, pretty or ugly, smart or foolish. Has anyone noticed that the Bible doesnt tell you how to tell others how to live. No! The focus is on how I sould live my life
One day, I'll be gone, and some people will think, Good ridens. I'm okay with that - unless their
opinion is the result of my selfishness or ignorance. In that case, I will apologize sincerely. If they choose not to forgive me, I will accept it. My responsibility is to offer a “genuine” apology, not to force forgiveness.
---
Side Note
Never use logic with someone operating from an emotional mindset - it doesn't work.

“Logic and emotion function on different planes of reality.”

A strong emotional response is a coping mechanism, a way to avoid expanding their perspective or
accepting others where they are in life. Acceptance doesn't mean changing your own stance; it means holding on to your beliefs while acknowledging theirs, even if they reject your point of view.
And believe it or not - that's okay.
There are billions of people who disagree with you, and billions more who think those billions are wrong. That's life.

We are all from the same dust, but each of us has a unique life history shaping our beliefs and worldview. No one sees life exactly as you do, because no one has lived entirely through your eyes. Accept that.

Use negative encounters as opportunities for growth. Learn to be at peace with yourself so you don't waste energy defending beliefs to someone who has no interest in considering them.
---
These thoughts are general observations, not strict rules - just insights from nearly 40 years in the mental health field. Take what resonates, leave what doesn't, and feel free to add to the conversation. There are plenty of gaps in this post, but this is a social media source lol.

08/05/2025

Notes I compiled for my doctoral studies. Feel free to interact. May need some refining

Understanding How We Think, Feel, and Act
A Guide to How the Mind Works and Why It Matters
Michael Flood Counseling & Testing Services

1. How We Make Sense of the World
Our brains do more than just take in sights and sounds.
We interpret everything based on past experiences, emotions, and beliefs.
• We use mental shortcuts (called patterns) to quickly understand what’s happening.
• These patterns are built over time and help us respond to life’s challenges.
• Sometimes, our brains rely more on what we already believe than what’s actually happening in the moment.

2. How We Learn and Grow
As we go through life, we’re constantly learning:
• When a new experience fits what we already believe, our brain adds it to that belief.
• When something doesn’t fit, we might need to adjust our thinking.
• Over time, our mind tries to find a balance between what’s familiar and what’s new.
This balance helps us feel stable and confident in how we see the world.
3. Memory’s Role in Our Reactions
Our past experiences often influence how we react today—even if we don’t realize it.
• Our memories shape our thoughts, feelings, and expectations.
• Sometimes, past experiences can “prime” us, making us react strongly without knowing why.
• The people who raised us often influence how we understand relationships, conflict, and safety.

4. Emotions Affect Our Perspective
How we feel often changes how we see and interpret what’s happening.
• If we’ve been hurt before, we may see current situations through a lens of fear, anger, or mistrust.
• If we’ve learned empathy or forgiveness, we’re more likely to stay calm and think clearly.
• The way we “frame” an event—how we explain it to ourselves—can shape our mood and our choices.

5. Mental Images and Self-Talk
Our minds use both pictures and words to think.
• If we focus on negative images or thoughts, our emotions can spiral.
• If we practice focusing on strengths or calming thoughts, we can feel more in control.
• The way we talk to ourselves—whether harsh or encouraging—makes a big difference.

6. How Family and Society Shape Us
We’re not just shaped by what happens to us—but also by how we experience those events.
• Families, friends, and media help form our ideas about relationships and ourselves.
• What we believe about an event often has more impact than the event itself.
• These beliefs become the filters through which we view the world.

7. Why Some People Act Out
It’s not just trauma that leads to emotional outbursts or harmful behaviors.
• When children grow up feeling unsafe, unloved, or misunderstood, they may struggle to manage anger or sadness later in life.
• Acting out can be a way of expressing pain, frustration, or feeling powerless.

8. Helpful Theories to Understand Behavior
Mental health experts have studied why people struggle:
• One theory says that sensitive people raised in emotionally invalidating homes may develop emotional or behavioral challenges.
• Another says our deep relationships—especially in childhood—shape how we feel about ourselves and others.
Even studies of twins and adopted children show that both environment and experience shape who we become.

9. Trust Issues and Feeling Disconnected
Children who were adopted or felt abandoned (physically and/or emotionally) often face unique challenges:
• They may struggle to trust others or feel unsure of who they really are.
• Criticism may feel like a deep wound instead of just feedback.
• Some may become “hyper-alert,” always looking for danger—even when there isn’t any.
Over time, this can lead to isolation, anger, or even acting put.

10. Final Thoughts
Our thoughts, feelings, and actions are deeply connected.
Many of the patterns we use to make sense of life were built early on—but they can be changed.
In counseling, we work to:
• Understand your story and how it shaped your patterns
• Learn new ways to think, feel, and respond
• Build emotional safety, connection, and healing

11/18/2024

While this is not reality in relationships, when we surrender our sense of entitlement it opens our ability to look beyond ourselves and generally more information can lead to healthier responses.

11/01/2024

Always conduct ourselves with honor and respect because today’s enemy could be tomorrow’s ally.

11/23/2023

My thanks to the many who wished me well on my birthday and words of excitement over completing my PhD. Thanks to all for your support and words of encouragement

07/13/2022

I am excited to announce a new addition to Michael Flood Counseling & Testing Services. Let me introduce to you, Patty Flood.
Patty Flood has worked in public and private education for over 30 years with the last 21 years as a middle school and high school principal, where she was responsible for various tasks. Seeing the need to improve her counseling skills she earned a Master of Arts in Human Services Counseling (2021), preceded with a Doctorate in Educational Leadership (2015). She is currently enrolled in a Master of Arts program for Clinical Mental Health Counseling for licensure. Additionally, Patty is taking courses with The Gottman Institute for marriage counseling to strengthen her working knowledge about couple’s counseling. Her area of interest is in cognitive behavioral therapy and strength-based counseling. She counsels individuals and couples over the age of 18. There are three ways to schedule an appointment with Patty Flood. To schedule an appointment call 717.267.4357 or email her at pfloodcounseling@gmail.com, or go online to www.michaelflood.org and in the “Contact” tab message us and we will reach out to you as soon as possible.

Resolve your personality and anxiety disorders with the help from Michael Flood Counseling & Testing Services. We are in Chambersburg, PA.

01/30/2022

These are generalities) We live our lives with people placing labels on us. Some of the first labels thrown my way were Michael and “cute baby” (maybe lol). None of the labels used by others define us. They are assigned by others to give them the ability to make sense of what they are encountering. Jerk, thoughtful, selfish, kind. So if the labels are more for the person assigning the label why do we take it personally? Because we doubt ourselves and so we look for reassurance in those labels. STOP. No one has lived your life and for them to think they can correctly label or classify you is rarely going to happen. Instead, look inside yourself for reassurance of worth. Begin with identifying strengths you have, like; kind, sacrificial, intelligent, funny, caring… These are the labels that define you - not the thoughts or labels others assign you. If we took only one experience from the life of Moses and use it to define him we might say he was a spoiled privileged brat who couldn’t control his anger. The first recorded adult experience of Moses is him killing an Egyptian. But that is a very small snapshot of his life and we see a life of sacrifice and humility - afterwards. Well the same is true of those judging you or labeling you. They are reacting to a limited snapshot of who you are. And trying to correct their image of you probably isn’t going to happen anytime soon. There is a reason for that resistance but I’ll save that for another post.
Final thought about labels and perceptions. Jesus did everything right and they still crucified Him saying he was full of lies. So don’t be surprised if people misunderstand you.

01/22/2022

If you have the ability to help someone, don’t do it for their acknowledgement of what a helpful person you are because sometimes it won’t come. Instead, help because you have the capacity to help and gather your worth in knowing you had the knowledge and/or resources to help - knowledge and resources they weren’t able to draw on from within themselves. Feel blessed and enriched that you did.

01/21/2022

Franklin County Training Day August 10, 2022 Rhodes Grove. I am providing a lecture entitled “PTSD: A Clinical Perspective”.

Contact info: Misty E. Conner
Information Access and LINK Services Coordinator
Franklin County
Email: mconner@franklincountypa.gov
717-709-2311-Office
717-261-2561 - Information & Referral Line

06/14/2020

The freedom to peacefully and respectfully exchange ideas is as old and as essential as language it’s self

06/04/2020

In response to COVID-19, I provide counseling sessions online using video conferencing for those preferring minimal exposure. I also see clients in my office, if you are comfortable with office visits.

05/09/2020

Recently saw a COVID-19 public service announcement I want to share (not a word for word representation). You are angry-it’s ok. You are impatient or have a short fuse-it’s ok. You have never used profanity but hear yourself cussing sometimes-it’s ok. Been feeling depressed or helpless-it’s ok.
Some stages of grief reflect similar emotions and responses. We have suffered and are suffering a loss and should be grieving, and this is what grieving can look like. It’s ok. However, don’t forget that others are grieving as well. Try to maintain a healthy balance of grieving while staying strong for those who depend on you, but don’t feel ashamed if that inner strength gives way to the expression of grieving.