09/09/2025
I absolutely LOVE THIS STORY! The message here is exactly what I strive to help the clients who work with me achieve in their own lives! ❤️🌿
"Of course you can!!!"
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Sunday evening was one of the wildest experiences of my life.
When I left the priesthood, there were plenty of logical things to expect, like having to find a new job or losing certain relationships. I should have prepared for many of those logical things, but it didn't.
The day I stepped down was a blur, but the following morning, as I was standing in my pajamas, Tashina asked me to run to the grocery store.
“But, what do I wear?”
I didn’t have an identity outside of the priesthood. The only clothing I owned was my clerical uniform, some ragged paint clothing, and the pajamas I was wearing.
There are many rules in the Orthodox Church that most folks probably don’t know about, like we can’t cut our beard, we aren’t allowed to dance, and it’s against the rules to wear rings. A dispensation was given to married priests in the states, but we must remove our wedding band during the liturgy.
As I slowly put myself together, with the assistance of Tashina, I began to find myself again.
One day, I was doomscrolling videos on YouTube and stopped to watch an interview with Jeff Goldblum. As he gesticulated, I noticed a ring on nearly every finger. I liked it.
“I wish I could do that!” I thought.
Then, a moment of healing happened in an instant.
I could.
Absolutely no one was stopping me from wearing rings. I could do whatever I wanted to do.
Shortly after that, I purchased the very first ring that I would wear. It was a small piece of amber in a silver setting, a fitting nod to the man who helped me realize that I could be myself.
A few months ago, I saw he would be touring at the Ryman with his band, The Mildred Snitzer Orchestra. It was happening shortly after my birthday, so I did something that I rarely do and did a thing for me: I bought two tickets to the show. This weekend, Tashina and I went out in a rare date night.
As we were leaving, I joked to the kids, saying their mom and I were sitting so close that “he could spit on us.”
We arrived at the show early, and as they scanned our tickets, the person doing so said, “He’s doing a Q&A right now.” We rushed inside and took our seats, which were in the front row. To my surprise, he accidentally spat directly on me as he was answering a question for someone sitting behind us.
Mortified, he leaned over and said, “Did I just spit on you?”
“It’s fine, I’ve got your DNA now.”
“My apologies. Send me the dry cleaning bill,” he joked back.
The woman that he was speaking to was invited to see him after the show to take a selfie.
As we were leaving, I joked to a member of the staff that I would gladly exchange a cleaning bill for a photo. They said, “It doesn’t hurt to ask.” A few moments later, we were waiting in line with other hopefuls, but it suddenly didn’t feel very likely. Then, a head popped out and said, “What’s your name?”
“Nathan Monk,” I responded, and he then disappeared for a few moments before ushering us in.
When it was my turn to say hello, I quickly told Jeff the story that I just shared with each of you. As I hurried through my explanation, I said, “So, I just wanted to take a moment to say thank you. You brought me healing, by just you being yourself, I realized I could be myself too.”
The next thing I knew, he reached out and gave me a big hug, saying, “Of course you can!”
Fighting back tears, someone else's voice said, “And you’ve done the same for me, Father Nathan.” To my shock, one of his staff members is part of our little community of misfits. As we all talked, I removed that original ring I bought all those years ago and gave it to Jeff.
“I want you to have this.”
“I couldn’t!” He said.
“Just ask Tashina, this is a thing I do.”
She convinced him that it was true, and he put it on his hand. I asked if we could take a selfie, and he said he wanted the ring in it.
Because I bought that ring, I learned to dress how I wish, I have danced, and I trimmed my beard. I started writing and telling my story. I’ve found healing, given and received forgiveness, and so much more than I could have ever imagined.
And now, I’ve had the chance to say thank you to one of the many people along the road who helped me get here.
