Portolan Counseling

11/08/2024

Somehow we choose what is familiar until we can say ‘It ends with us’.
The movie is a little cliche’ but it really brings home the message.

06/02/2023

To be without a reference point is the ultimate loneliness. It is also called enlightenment. Thoughts on Buddhism and loneliness.

04/23/2023

You may be well intended and say to a friend who is hurting:
“Hey, things are looking up for you! Focus on the positive!”
Your friend doesn’t feel relief, they feel shame. They withdraw from you because shame makes a person hide. You have no idea.
In order to create connections in our lives we need to ‘push through the discomfort’ of how other people make us feel when they are sad or hurting.
You don’t have to ‘fix’ anything when a friend is hurting; they will be relieved for you ‘staying’ emotionally and not abandoning them to their own feeling.
We also need to learn to recognize shame when we are in the presence of toxic positivity and learn how to take care of ourselves. There are two sides to this. We all need to ‘do the work’.

04/23/2023

12/21/2022

I have picked my word of intent for 2023: equanimity.
Equanimity is essentially Wise Mind, as Marsha Linehan calls it in DBT, and the trick is to not ‘bite the hook’ (Poema Chodron reference) of emotions.
May 2023 pick your word of intent!!! ❤️

11/15/2022

First snow of the season!
Enjoy! 😉

10/22/2022

😄 Cartoon: Dan Piraro Bizarro Comics

10/14/2022

A very hard to watch film (r**e and violence scenes) about survival, shame and the healing power of telling your story and having your voice heard.

10/13/2022

Joy, is your birthright