Arlene Kauffman, LMFT

01/06/2026

01/06/2026

01/06/2026

“Even in a crowd, a child feels alone when their feelings become jokes.”💔

01/04/2026

Self-Regulation Tool: Humming...Why do we recommend this strategy to calm the body? Here are a few reasons:

🎵Humming stimulates the Vagus Nerve: Humming sends gentle vibrations through the body that stimulate the vagus nerve, which controls the parasympathetic nervous system, your body's natural "calm down" system. https://www.theottoolbox.com/what-is-polyvagal-theory/

🎵Humming naturally encourages slower, deeper breaths, which helps reduce stress and regulate the nervous system. https://www.theottoolbox.com/relaxation-breathing-a-powerful-tool/

🎵Provides Proprioceptive and Auditory Input: The vibration and sound offer sensory input that’s organizing and soothing, especially for those with sensory processing differences. https://www.theottoolbox.com/proprioception-activities-improves-body-awareness/

🎵Supports Interoception: The internal awareness created through the vibration helps build connection to how your body feels. https://www.theottoolbox.com/what-you-need-to-know-about-interoception/

01/04/2026

Reasons Kids Need Routines and Schedules 💛✨

01/04/2026

Self regulation tools listed below. ⬇️ ⬇️⬇️

Regulation
💚https://www.theottoolbox.com/zones-of-regulation-activities/
💚https://www.theottoolbox.com/co-regulation/
💚 https://www.theottoolbox.com/mindfulness-for-kids/
💚https://www.theottoolbox.com/emotional-intelligence-2/

Emotional regulation
💚https://www.theottoolbox.com/emotional-regulation-and-executive-function/
💚https://www.theottoolbox.com/mental-dexterity-how-to-battle-brain-fog/
💚https://www.theottoolbox.com/affect-modulation-strategies/
💚https://www.theottoolbox.com/social-emotional-learning-worksheet/
💚https://www.theottoolbox.com/understanding-sensory-dysregulation/

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01/04/2026

WHEN TRIGGERED, REMEMBER TO GIVE YOURSELF G.R.A.C.E.

Triggers often show up quietly and then suddenly feel overwhelming.
A tone of voice.
A delayed reply.
A look that reminds you of an old wound.
A boundary crossed.
Feeling unseen, corrected, abandoned, or misunderstood.

In these moments, the body reacts faster than the mind. What surfaces is not immaturity or over-sensitivity—it is memory. The nervous system responding to what once hurt.

This is where G.R.A.C.E. becomes a lived practice, not a concept.

G — Ground
Use this when you feel your body tightening, your breath becoming shallow, or your thoughts racing.
Grounding helps when you feel flooded—during an argument, after a harsh comment, or when your body feels on edge for “no clear reason.”

R — Recognize
Use this when self-criticism begins.
Recognize that what you’re feeling is a trigger, not the whole truth of the present moment.
This step is especially helpful in relationships—when old attachment wounds are activated.

A — Allow
Use this when you feel the urge to suppress, distract, or immediately “move on.”
Allowing is essential after emotional invalidation, conflict, or when grief or anger feels inconvenient but persistent.

C — Compassion
Use this when shame appears.
Compassion is needed when you judge yourself for reacting, crying, freezing, or needing reassurance.
It reminds you that this response was once a survival strategy.

E — Engage with choice
Use this when you are about to send a message, lash out, withdraw, or over-explain.
Engaging with choice allows you to pause and ask:
“What would feel most regulating—not most reactive—right now?”

⸻

Situations where G.R.A.C.E. is especially helpful
• During conflict with loved ones
• When you feel criticized, controlled, or dismissed
• After emotional neglect or silence
• In moments of abandonment fear or rejection
• When old family dynamics resurface
• When you feel guilty for having needs
• When your body reacts before logic can intervene

Triggers are not signs that you are “going backwards.”
They are places where healing is asking to go deeper.

Meeting these moments with G.R.A.C.E. teaches the nervous system something new:
This time, I am not alone with what I feel.

And that—slowly, gently—is how safety is re-learned.🤗🤗

01/02/2026

As we take time to reflect on the past year and look forward to what lies ahead, we invite you to embrace these simple intentions in your home for 2026 💟 📅

01/02/2026

01/02/2026

Emotional regulation and executive function are connected in more ways than one. Development of social emotional skills includes an awareness of self and self-monitoring skills, among other areas. The regulation of those emotions is critical for executive functioning cognitive tasks. When we regulate behavior, the frontal lobe is at work with it’s impulse control, initiation, self-monitoring, and other cognitive skills.

AND, emotional skill development includes the ability to self-regulate. These skills mature and develop throughout childhood and into adulthood.

https://www.theottoolbox.com/emotional-regulation-and-executive-function/

01/02/2026

Unlocking instant healing can be simpler than you think.

When life throws stress and discomfort your way, knowing how to find relief in just one minute can be a game changer. The body often reacts to tension with a fight-or-flight response, but there are several techniques you can employ to calm your mind and rejuvenate your spirit almost instantly.

One effective method is slow nasal breathing. Inhale deeply for a count of four, then exhale for six. This simple act helps shift your nervous system away from stress and promotes relaxation.

Standing up and stretching your spine can also do wonders. Lengthening your body upward while rolling your shoulders back increases circulation and reduces feelings of stiffness, allowing for a more comfortable posture.

Another quick fix is splashing cold water on your face. This technique activates the dive response, stimulating the vagus nerve, which can slow your racing thoughts and bring you a sense of calm.

Breathe into your belly next. Deep abdominal breathing boosts oxygen levels, enhances digestion, and quells anxiety. This may seem small, but its impact is significant.

Taking a moment to look at the horizon can help too. Focusing on distant objects for 30 to 60 seconds relaxes your eye muscles and resets your focus, promoting mental clarity.

Aromatherapy can also play a role in quick healing. Sniffing lemon or peppermint can cut through nausea and fatigue, refreshing your mental state.

Don’t forget about grounding. Placing your feet flat on the ground helps reduce muscle tension and quiets mental noise, providing a sense of stability.

Lastly, pressing your thumb into the center of your palm activates an acupressure point that interrupts stress signals, offering immediate relief.

In under a minute, these techniques can help transform distress into calmness, empowering you to take charge of your well-being.