Catalina Fortich Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

09/29/2025

Day 2 of the Masters Conference in and all I can say is what an experience! Getting to meet the people that I have learned so much from and admire in this field of psychology is truly an honor.

We share a common language and career, but most importantly we share a deep desire to help our clients heal from the unspeakable, and “find peace” in what is possible as so brilliantly said today in his session on Parental . Can’t wait for tomorrow!

09/10/2025

This one was a hard and heavy one to make. I don’t think people understand how important it is to heal ourselves to have healthier relationships, raise healthier kids, establish healthier homes and ultimately have healthier communities, government, leaders, etc!
The violence we see is a direct result of the trauma that exists in this world.
Violence is an amalgamation of hate…an inevitable consequence of not knowing how to deal with the pain and suffering. Spoiler alert…hate does not fix hate. More self-loathing does not fix self loathing!
We need to change things around. Are we that far gone that we can’t see it?

09/09/2025

Breaking deeply imbedded patterns and beliefs isn’t easy…but so worth it!
What patterns are you working to address change in your relationships?!

07/31/2025

Parents may work very hard to shield their child from the harms of the world, but they can often neglect to protect them from the greatest harm of all.

07/12/2025

Truth is, we normalized for way to long that sh*tty behavior was OK because it was normal, familiar and habitual.
Maybe you grew up hearing or seeing that behavior at home.
Maybe you were never taught what to do differently.
But now you are in relationships that feel like you get stuck in the same cycle of blame, defensiveness, anger, hurt, and hopelessness.
We have all been there. Because the truth is that most of us did not come from emotionally healthy homes.
Good people with Good Intentions but Sh*tty Patterns.
This is not about blaming them or yourself. Although accountability is an important part of breaking these patterns, you can only do that from COMPASSIONATE/HONEST OBSERVATION of yourself.
NOTE: THIS DOES NOT APPLY IN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIPS.

05/20/2025

Grief from estrangement is real - even if others don’t understand it because it was your “choice”.
I have sat on both sides of the estrangement issues as a family therapist. It is a highly misunderstood and polarizing issue, and yet it is a reality for at least 27% of Americans who have reported to be cut off from at least one family member.
There are no easy answers, but there is a lot of hurt that requires a lot of compassion and support. No one chooses this to be their reality. For many it can take years or decades in each stage of “denial”, “anger”, “bargaining” etc. before they make this difficult decision. Let’s be mindful to remember that no one has ever healed from a place of shame or judgement.

05/19/2025

A topic that has always been very prominent in my career (and personal life) has been the issue of estrangement in families. I have sat in both sides of this discussion with many clients. Many whom have made the very difficult choice (i don’t like calling it a choice but there isn’t a word that describes a choice that you had no choice but to make) of cutting off family members. I have also sat with many parents who have been cut off from their adult-children and are very confused about “what they did wrong?”
I bring compassion to both and together, without an agenda other than to help them better understand and in some cases mend their relationship. It isn’t an easy path. There are no easy answers. But I can say that this is a journey of grief. This post is for the adult-children whom have made the decision and hopefully can help those who are interested in deeper understanding. These stages are never linear and can overlap. We can even circle back to them at different moments in time. I want to also be clear that many times, people can stay in a stage of denial, anger, bargaining, etc for YEARS or DECADES before they can come to true acceptance or make the decision to cut-off. This doesn’t happen overnight and that is a huge misconception that I hope can be clarified.

05/11/2025

To the mothers and caretakers who are safe places for the children in their lives, you are appreciated and so needed.
Children need at least one adult in their life who they can feel safe place with and that is without a doubt a privilege to be on the receiving end of that trust.
To the mothers reparenting themselves, I also see and hold you today.

03/26/2025

Conflicts are not events to avoid, but opportunities for growth.
Stop avoiding conflict or justifying hurtful behaviors and start learning to expand your capacity to have difficult conversations, regulate, understand and communicate your emotions.

02/12/2025

Often times we believe we are setting boundaries and become frustrated that they are not “working” because the other person isn’t following through or respecting them. This is a reminder that boundaries only work when you can enforce it.
You decide what your response will be to someone dismissing or not agreeing to whatever need, value or preference you deem highly important.
Sometimes our values clash, sometimes our need is not compatible with the other persons capacity to met them. This is a difficult reality of most relationships.
You get to decide if that’s something you are willing or unwilling to negotiate. But first, let’s get clear on what a boundary is and whether or not you are actually being clear and congruent with your own limits.
Are you stating them as requests? Are you willing to enforce the limit of the line is crosses?
Are you open to compromise or is this a hard line in the sand, and if so, have you communicated that clearly?

12/27/2024

Until we gain clarity on what is actually contributing to our own suffering, we will never be able to understand how to build a life that prioritizes health. These behaviors are NOT signs of resilience.
Being able to “bounce back” after difficulty still requires us to acknowledge the pain first and allowing us to hold BOTH our strength and fragility.
We have become so afraid of feeling any discomfort we have become completely unable to connect with our emotions which is necessary to our psychological and physical well-being.
Were you taught to see these traits as “virtuous”?

12/04/2024