11/12/2012
Friendship:
What is friendship? Who are our friends and do we get any benefits out of these friendships? Then we ask ourselves; who are our friends or our true friends?
Facebook has served us, netizens, to connect with our friends, relatives and make new friendships.
A friend has been defined in so many ways; as a person known well to another and regarded with liking, affection, and loyalty; an intimate; an acquaintance or associate; an ally in a fight or cause; a fellow member of a party or a society, etc; a patron or supporter.
But then; there are many levels of friendships or kinds of friends. In some articles, it has been written that Aristotle has figured out 3 kinds of friends or friendships.
1) Friendships of utility: This exists between you and someone who is useful to you in some way. For instance, the two of you take turns going out on coffee runs, or when you're friendly with your neighbor because she waters your plants or take watch of your house when you are out on vacation and you take care of hers/his when she's away. According to Aristotle; in this kind, “the friendship breaks up when there is the disappearance of the ground for friendship, because that was what kept it alive”. This kind of friendship is rather common in our society.
These are friendships of the "You scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours” kind.
2) Friendships of pleasure: This exists between you and those whose company you enjoy. These are most often your "activity buddies": people with whom you do things like playing soccer, going for long bike rides, basketball, volleyball, golf, etc. Your chit chatting buddies may fall under this category. Friendships between a male and a female at times develop into relationships, they fall in love and an erotic friendship progresses because for the most part especially among the young, this is swayed by the feelings and is based on pleasure too.
3) Friendships of the good: This friendship is one of the many good things that happen to you. This is based on mutual respect and admiration. It takes a longer time to develop this kind of friendship. This kind is more powerful and enduring because then you and your friend recognize that you share almost the same values and goals; share the same visions on how life and/or the world around you should be. In many cases you start this kind of friendship from among your childhood friends or maybe from among your cousins; your schoolmates during one’s high school days or even yet in college and in one’s place of work. This kind desires the good of their friends for the friends’ sake, because each loves the other for what he is, and not for any incidental quality. Friendships of this kind most often than not are permanent, because in these are all the attributes that friends ought to possess. To be continued….
By: Betty
Ref: Maura Kelly May 2010, Aristotle (1976) The Nicomachen Ethics
Doyle, M. E. and Smith, M. K. (2002) 'Friendship: theory and experience', the encyclopaedia of informal education, Last update: May 29, 2012
