Audubon Counseling

02/12/2024

Sometimes we don’t need advice, sometimes all we need is to have someone who feels our feels. Having a friend or partner that we can feel safe with, for simply being by our side.

Posted by Lynne R Shine,LMHC CRC

01/24/2024

This popular internet story from 2020 is worth recirculating now! An anonymous teacher filled the hallway with balloons. The teacher had each child blow up a balloon and put their name on the front. He mixed his classroom’s balloons inside of all of the other balloons. The teacher, then released the children to find their own balloon. The kids could not find their own, and he asked each child to pass the named balloon to the person on their right. He said this is like happiness if you’re only only looking for your own, we will never find it. But if we care about other people’s happiness, we can find ours too.

01/17/2024

This quote from Liz Newman
So many clients talk about feeling judged while in their crises, or judge others while they are struggling. I always say..we never ever know how you would behave, unless you are in that person’s shoes. People will say “I would definitely leave, if my spouse had an infidelity,” Leaving the friend feeling weak which is so far from the truth. People will question someone experiencing infertility and be angry that the person does not feel well enough to attend the family’s baby shower. People will question why someone doesn’t act “more positive” regarding sickness or questions how others digest what is happening in our world. People question how others parent their own children, if things go awry, without knowing the full picture. That family only needs to feel supported. Etc etc
The most important and only rule..show & !

Posted by Lynne Shine, LMHC CRC

01/16/2024

01/07/2024

Anger and hate are what can be referred to as “blanket emotions,” covering up deeper emotions like fear or hurt. Anger is a healthy emotion like all others but when we are fearful of something or someone, channeling that fear to anger provides a false sense of empowerment. Short term,
feeling angry can feel better than being afraid or hurt. Channeling such anger toward others because of your fears can become prejudice or judgmental. It is damaging. Take the time to educate before lashing out. Read, volunteer, talk. LISTEN! Be aware of false sense of security in group mentality; attaching yourself to a group of like minded thinkers that stereotype or judge others and most likely increase the internal fear and anxiety thus increasing the external anger.

01/05/2024

Loving this instagram post from Nate Postlethwait.
I know it’s difficult to see those around you uncomfortable. I know we are often taught that negativity drains your energy. Yet, telling anyone to “be positive” or to “Look on the bright side,” is toxic positivity. Allow yourself and those who you care about to feel whatever they feel. Listen without judgement. Listen without fixing. THAT is helpful and loving. We never know

Posted by Lynne Shine LMHC CRC

12/27/2023

We don’t realize how much our children are sponges, absorbing our every word. When kids personalities are developing, they care so much more about what you think of them, than their peers, coaches or teachers.

1.Educate without judgement.
2.Listen as much as you speak.
3.Use kindness, compassion and benefit of the doubt.
4.Teach self esteem “You are enough, you are good, you are worthy and capable.” NOT achievement focus or what others think of you or how much money you make or the clothes you wear or the house you live in…etc.

What you say matters!


Posted by Lynne Shine LMHC CRC

12/24/2023

Happy Holidays aren’t always happy. The pressure to “be happy” is real. Give yourself a gift this holiday…leave yourself alone. Feel whatever you feel. Just feel!

12/14/2023

I often hear from abused or mistreated clients that they weren’t loved by a parent or significant other etc. and they wonder why and how they weren’t lovable. I also watch people wrestle with staying in toxic relationships with people simply because the person loves them.
This quote is simple yet resonates, as we cannot control another person’s behaviors. Some people do not have social or emotional capacity to show love. Sometimes, love is just not enough. Tell yourself that YOU are enough! Believe and understand why you are lovable. At that point you can decide whether you are being filled up or depleted in your relationship and make some changes.

12/11/2023

I know it’s scary to think about standing up and asserting yourself with your partner! People are also extra frightened about leaving a partner, even when the relationship is toxic. We are often extremely nervous about being “alone!” You need to remember that if you don’t take care of yourself first, no one else will. It is much more lonely to be in a relationship without connecting with your partner than actually being alone.

12/05/2023

We are not our illnesses… we may battle our illnesses…we survive our illnesses…we combat our illnesses, and sometimes we succumb to our illnesses. . Our depression or anxiety or any other mental illness does not define us, it simply makes us stronger than most. The strongest and most successful people in our society have had to overcome adversity and pain.

11/10/2023

I start each marriage counseling with the “love story!” Often what spouses loved in the fantasy stage (stage before sharing finance, children, house, extended family etc.) is a source of discontent by the time I see them. Spend time remembering why you fell in love. Remember while the beginning attraction is important, your partner’s “roots” will sustain you.