12/01/2023
A REMINDER OF WHY I DO WHAT I DO...
I created Terms of Endearment Funeral and Memorial Program Services after I lost my sister in December 2001. I can remember it being around this time of the year that I was preparing to lay her to rest in the mist of the hustle and bustle of Christmas shopping. Quite vividly, I stopped at the TJ Maxx on 16 Mile and Grosbeck to get my niece some tights. It was so cold that night and I was running on God's power, because truthfully I had nothing left in me. I had my mother, my sister's children and creating her funeral programs in the back of my mind. I knew I was about to be at Kinkos printing 500 programs by myself. I can still see this woman and her daughter holding hands as they walked toward the entrance of the store. I said to myself, all these people around me that they have no idea I'm dying inside. Creating her obituary was the worst experience. I had no one with me to help. They looked horrible. I was not happy. I was so tired. I never wanted anyone to go through that experience. Shortly after, I created Terms to take some of the stress off of people who are tasked with the job of creating a home-going celebration for their loved ones. A few years ago, I said I was done with this industry. Over time with anything, it wears you down. I was becoming so emotional over people I didn't even know in a lot of cases. I can tell you that in the last 28 years of creating these lasting memories, I've given away way more than I can say I've made. It's one of the few things that I do that I don't put any real advertising to...only word of mouth. So it's fair to say it's not for the money. One morning I ran across a post from my niece asking us to pray for her family at the time of their loss. My thoughts.....who is this beautiful little girl? I didn't know her. She wasn't a part of my "model daycare" crew. So I asked. When she told me who she belonged to I asked her to ask the family could I do her obituary. They accepted my offer. The morning that received her pictures was the closest I've ever came to having a nervous breakdown. I think I cried for the whole day. THIS IS IT...I'm done. How I was going to get through doing this program, I didn't know. I took on the task the best I could but this one broke me to my core. A few short months later, I would be doing my mother's program and back to back to back to back relatives and friends. Recently I decided to go back into designing programs because basically I never stopped. The other day, I was called on to assist yet another family friend and I began to question if I'm built for it anymore when out of the blue I received a message from Kassidy's mom thanking me for being there for her and her family. God is so gracious in how He confirms. It's amazing how someone so small with only a short time on this earth can impact as many lives as a dictator who lived 100 years. Little Kassidy's purpose for me is to stay true to what God ushers me to do and to not question His will. I introduce to you Little Ms. Kassidy...my purpose...my reason.
