Lovely Belly Doula

10/05/2019

09/06/2019

Hint: They don’t just get ‘dad bods.’

08/04/2019

Postpartum OCD and anxiety 🤚🏼

The sheer volume of terrifying thoughts can transform new-parent nerves into unmanageable anxiety.

07/17/2019

How to help a Mama (and her family) out! 💯

This. 💥

06/30/2019

New Mothers are constantly told that their milk supply isn’t up to par with what the baby needs, which sometimes leads to further implications down the road.

This post makes a good point, comparing the size of a newborn stomach to what 2oz of formula looks like.

This is so important to keep in mind. Your body is smart. Your body knows what to do. Trust your body.

" See that tiny pink bead on the lanyard? That is the size of a newborn's tiny tummy. When baby is born, the birthing parent produces colostrum for baby, which is the perfect super food for baby. Colostrum contains just the amount of food baby needs and passes antibodies. It's liquid gold! In this photo, I have a standard 2 ounce bottle of formula that is given to new babies. So, if baby's belly is only the size of a marble, what happens when baby is fed 2 ounces? Well, baby will usually spit up all the extra, which then can be spinned into baby having reflux. When really, baby is just being over fed. This leads to interventions like formula changes, antacid medications, etc. It's important that we give families all the available information so they can make the best decisions for their families."

04/28/2019

Home Birth or Hospital Birth? What are you choosing and WHY? Dive into the hard questions and really figure out the true-for-you answers. Are your choices coming from a place of fear and conditioning or from a place of inner-knowing and trust? 💗

I don’t often venture into the hospital vs home debate because mostly I feel like people will do what they do; and we’re all on a different path that includes different choices! However, I do have something to offer (and I wasn’t able to offer it vocally yesterday at our free workshop; I lost my voice which means I probably wasn’t supposed to say so much!)…..
**
For people that say “but I feel safest at the hospital”…on one hand, so be it. On the other, it’s become so weirdly “politically correct” to not question this choice even though if we re-framed it, it would sound ridiculous! If that same person said they didn’t want to sleep at home every night, but instead felt safer sleeping at a sleep clinic under doctor’s care, we’d probably be more open in questioning that with them! We might say, wow, do you have a health condition that makes you scared to sleep without someone watching? Or we might think or say, wow, do you have some major stuff (like death!?) that you’d like to talk through? Because being afraid of sleeping would not be considered normal. How is it so much different with birth? **
To the hospital choosers, I’d offer the same. Do you have a health condition that makes surgical access more appropriate? And can we go deep into the fears that make you feel “safer” under a surgeon’s care for a normal, physiological process? What do you want to explore (with or without some guidance) about your ancestral history? Your mom’s births? Your own birth? You own fears and digging deep into your trust or lack of in your body. If you’re choosing a path that will not ask you these thought questions, why? And if we aren’t asking these questions, what do we hope for the future generations? Photo thank you sweet mama and credit to Amelia.

02/11/2019

In order to better prepare ourselves for birth, we must first know what birth looks like.

Birth Becomes Her announced its annual photography contest winners.

02/10/2019

GOVERNMENT INTERFERENCE, LIKE ABORTION BANS, MAKES HARD SITUATIONS WORSE, FORCING FAMILIES TO GREATER EXTREMES.

As the Senate prepares to advance a bill on a 20-week abortion ban, one woman shares her story.

12/20/2018

Support the Mama.

Credit My Pure Delivery

12/09/2018

Ok! After taking some time away from my hands-on birth work, I’m so excited to announce that I am now accepting Birth & Postpartum clients for 2019!🤰🏻
This last year has been so full of...well, everything! I free-birthed my second baby, took a couple wonderful Indie Birth Association courses (and devoured their podcasts!), and learned more about myself (and motherhood) than I ever thought possible in such a short amount of time. And I’m very much looking forward to sharing that knowledge with the women and families I work with!
In addition to my in-person birth & postpartum services, I am also offering something a little different! In hopes of helping even more women transition into Motherhood, I am offering Postpartum Distance Doula support! This support is for mums who may not have access to a postpartum doula in their area, want additional support without another human in their home, or who just want a listening ear and an open heart. Really, for anyone...new and seasoned mothers alike!
☝🏼One more thing! Gift certificates are available for all services. So if you’re wanting to gift a loved one with invaluable doula support, I’m your gal!
🌟DM me or head over to lovelybellydoula.com for more info/details🌟

11/18/2018

This right here. This is some of the stuff that isn’t talked about after we birth our babies. Some of the most important stuff!

I struggled with postpartum anxiety after the birth of my first child and am still struggling with it now after the birth of my second. I have the same visions Con describes in her post. Visions of horrible scenarios happening and my babies dying in tragic accidents or being kidnapped. Just awful, scary thoughts.

It doesn’t happen all the time, and it doesn’t affect my ability to be a good mother....but it’s still really scary. I’ve found that heading outside with the kiddos or turning on some jams and dancing my butt off usually clears my head and puts me in a better space.

We’ve got to talk about these things. Don’t be ashamed if you have these thoughts/feelings, it’s more common than you think. Reach out to someone you trust...and if you don’t have anyone you feel comfortable reaching out to in your daily life, send me a message. I’m here for you, Mamas.

❤️

Something happens to me every single time I have a baby.

I get visions, not like “I see dead people” but I imagine horrible visions of horrible things happening to my baby.

Getting run over, falling over any balcony.

It gets to the point where I can’t walk past a table without envisioning dropping the baby on the corner of the table and cracking its head open.

I have never dropped a baby and my babies sure as s**t don’t spend anytime on a drive way waiting to be run over.

The first time it ever happened, with my first baby, I went to the doctor because I was so confused, I felt scared and I felt guilty for putting horrible visions into the world. But if I was boiling water on the stove I’d get a vision that it would fall on my baby somehow I needed to talk to someone.

My GP, a mother herself told me that what I was explaining had plenty of different names but was essentially post natal anxiety and it was very common. The doctor told me to look after me more, get as much sleep as I can and let her know if it gets worse, because despite being common it generally fades off as the baby gets older and if it gets worse I might need more help.

So it’s back again, my old friend post natal anxiety. It’s isn’t debilitating at all, it doesn’t effect my parenting or my life but I do ask my husband to be the one to carry Raja down the stairs and crossing a road simply because my paranoid superstitious mind tricks me into thinking that I’m inviting an accident by envisioning one all the time.

I shared an Instagram story about this the other day and hand on my heart I’ve never had so many responses to a story. Common is an understatement, a lot of us are suffering from this form of anxiety.

So really I just wanted to give a shout out to all the new mummas out there and let you know that it does get better, it feels bloody great to talk to a doctor about it, just like getting a papsmear or annual bloods, your mind needs to be taken care of with love and support.

You are not alone, I am with you, your baby is safe and your s**tty visions are there to remind you that this love you feel for your baby is overwhelmingly strong.
You were born with extreme instincts to keep that baby safe and sometimes they go in overdrive.

Babies are born with nothing, no possessions or knowledge, all they are born with is us. We are their birthday present from the universe.

And every time I look at my son all I see from him is gratitude. 🙏🏽💗👑

Please look after, love, praise and take time for you, ask your village for help. 💗

And if you don’t have a village, don’t worry.. I am in the process of creating one 💗💜👑

11/14/2018

We have the right to the birth experience of our choice! OUR BODIES, OUR BABIES, OUR CHOICES.

Mothers have the right to a safe natural birth of their choice. Save Martina (midwife)

11/04/2018

POSTPARTUM HAIR LOSS

I sure as s**t didn’t know about it before I had my first kiddo. Then my hair started falling out around three months postpartum. And I was like: “WHAAAT?!”

Same with my second babe. But this time around I feel like it’s so much more. Clumps like this in the shower, constantly shedding strands of hair during the day - and LOTS of them. Always feeling hair dangling down my arms as it clings to my clothing. Just hair everywhere, all the time. I’m remembering why I chopped my hair off after my first baby (a combination of the hair loss and his sticky little grippy hands constantly pulling at it).

Why does this happen?? Why is all my luscious, thick, healthy hair falling out at such an alarming rate?? Is this normal??

Because, hormones. And yes, it’s 100% normal. While you’re pregnant the increased levels of estrogen encourage hair growth and essentially freeze your hair in the “resting phase”...meaning all the new hair that is grown won’t fall out at its normal rate. Which is why many women experience thicker locks while pregnant. After birth, hormones begin to even out again, estrogen levels drop back to [your] normal and all the hair that’s been growing so wonderfully (and NOT falling out) is zapped back into its normal growth cycle and starts to fall out.

Siiiiiigh. See ya later lustrous locks!

Luckily, postpartum hair loss has zilch to do with breastfeeding and should return to normal-ish around six months. (I have to keep reminding myself of this so I don’t chop it again 🤦🏽‍♀️).

Another fun hair thing no one told me about (maybe it’s not quite as common?) is the greasy hair thing! That kicked in around six months postpartum with my first. We’ll see what happens this time around. Anyone else experience this???

**tnoonetellsyouaboutpregnancy

10/16/2018

Almost exactly one year ago I became pregnant with my second child. It was not planned or intentional and to be honest, not at all what I wanted. I remember anxiously peeing on that First Response stick, already knowing the answer in my heart but hoping somehow I was wrong. I wasn't wrong...the test was positive immediately. My heart sank, I became nauseous and I burst into tears on the bathroom floor. I wasn't even sure I wanted another child, and I definitely didn't want one now.

I spent weeks in anguish over deciding whether or not to keep the pregnancy. Weeks full of crying, praying, begging and questioning. Weeks full of some if the most painful, emotional conversations with my partner we'd ever had. In my mind and in my heart, there was no right answer for me. I felt so conflicted and couldn't commit to either option. Part of me feels like I never really made a conscious decision, like I just kind of let time run out and the decision was made for me. But really, that in itself WAS a decision, I guess.

I spent the majority of my pregnancy mourning the one-on-one time I would no longer have with my son. I cried more tears in 40 weeks than I have at any other time in my life. And even though he was still right there with me, I missed my son more than anyone I'd ever actually had to say goodbye to. I didn't feel like any of it was fair. It wasn't fair to my son to have to share me. It wasn't fair to me to give up my body, my time, my energy all over again for something I didn't really want. It wasn't fair to my relationship with my partner, which had already suffered tremendously after the birth of our son. None of it was fair.

But through all the sorrow and anger and guilt and despair, I slowly came to accept the gift I had been given. I made intentional, educated and deliberate choices when it came to how I wanted to birth my daughter. And even though I was scared I wouldn't, I came to love the tiny baby growing inside me.

I chose to shift my perspective around my pregnancy and use it as first hand experience to practice (again) what I believe in. What I know in my bones to be true about birth. That I was made for it. My body, my baby, we were designed to work together as a team on this journey. I didn't need anyone or anything else to give me the answers to my questions. I educated myself and sat with my baby, talking to her, listening to her, listening to my heart. I had everything I needed within myself.

I still have days where I wonder what Archer and I would be doing if Izzah weren't here with us, what our life would look like. And I still have days where I feel sad and guilty and angry that I can't give Archer all my attention. But there hasn't been a single day that I've wished anything to be different or wished that I'd made a different decision.

🍂What is hard in your life right now? What are you struggling to make sense of? What can you do to shift your perspective? What lessons can you learn from your current situation?🍂

I believe everything happens for a reason. Everything we are put through is an opportunity for growth and learning and development. I believe that there are greater plans and forces at work out there, and even though it's hard to do sometimes, I trust that everything will always turn out the way it's supposed to.

09/18/2018

This! Love Aviva Romm ❤

Nearly 30 years ago I gave birth to my first baby at home, followed by three more children via three more home births in the ensuing decade. My four births were beautiful, meaningful, empowering events that supported my smooth transition into natural mothering. Admittedly, this was long before I was...

08/30/2018

"Postpartum mental illness is not inevitable and in many cases can be prevented. It is time that we recognize and meet the needs of postpartum women. The health of our families depends on it."

America has this so f*cking backwards.

And what baffles me even more is that women who have given birth before and know how difficult the postpartum period can be, and how much help the Mother needs (and rightfully deserves), are often nowhere to be seen after the baby arrives. And if they are around, it's all about the baby. 😒

Personally, I don't think if I've ever felt more invisible than I have after the birth of my babies because people really DO just focus on the baby after he/she is born. They either completely forget or are completely ignorant to the incredible amount of work the Mother just did to bring their baby into the world.

(This is not at all to say that I haven't also received massive amounts of support as well. The crazy abundance of food people brought to me and my family after my births were insane and I am so grateful for my community! Not to mention the people who were coming over to help clean my home and hang with my son! 🙏)

But, we still need to do better! Mamas, read The Fourth Trimester by Kimberly Ann Johnson and start preparing for your postpartum period early. Line up help you can count on. Hire a postpartum doula. Don't neglect yourself and don't think you have to Super Woman your way through it. Call on your community members and friends. The people who love you really do want to help, sometimes they just don't know how. So ask for what you need! Set boundaries! (I know it's hard, trust me!) But it's so worth it, and you SO deserve to be nurtured. ❤

Kathleen Kendall-Tackett examines how other cultures protect new mothers’ well-being.

08/29/2018

I completely support and even encourage Mama’s to nurse their babes to sleep if it works and is enjoyable for everyone. I nursed my oldest to sleep every night (and nap!) for 2+ years and am doing it again with my daughter. Why? Because it works for us. Because it's calming and soothing for both of us. Because the thought of my face being the last my babes see before they drift off to Dreamland is so beautifully romantic. Because I love holding their little bodies and nourishing them until they are so comfortable and content that they let their eyelids become heavy and flutter closed. And above all, because they count on it.