09/13/2025
I have been reading this book on and off for a year, not because it's not good, but because work has been killing my work-life balance. This morning, I grabbed it and decided to take a different approach to catching up.
Instead of starting over at the chapter I had stopped at or going back a few paragraphs from where I left off, I closed my eyes and said 'Show me what I need to see right now,' and feathered the pages to a random stop. I started reading where my eyes landed on the page: “Our dog Ollie is a small”……woah. That's a little weird. I mean, I know Ollie isn't the most elusive name for a dog, but still…..I looked down at my little Ollie and gave him a rub on the head.
Possible nudge from the universe or fru-fru nonsense aside, I read on. The story of their dog leads into how the animal brain, including human, releases dopamine when we engage in seeking behavior. That can be seeking information, seeking food, seeking truth, which explains the obsession-like growth of true crime podcasts. The dopamine stops being released once we find the thing we're looking for. Essentially, the mere feeling of intense curiosity is rewarding (all the Yentas rejoice in scientific validation 🤣).
The segue was into our human need to belong, the never-ending search for validation (its not just you, Yenta’s!), and our different ways of measuring each other up to fit the bill. This leads into an explanation of Spiral Dynamics, a system developed by Don Beck that identifies the fine gradations of belief systems in societies:
“His current work attempts to break up the thinking that fuels us-versus-them prejudice by showing people on one side that those on the other side are not all the same. In Beck's experience, what often polarizes people or pulls societies apart is a simple lack of appreciation of the spectrum of different beliefs that exist in cultures outside of their own.”
Look, I know a lot of people don't read anymore. My niece told me a while back that with all the available resources on social media, there's really no need, because you can always find someone to tell you the information you seek (first of all 😳, and second of all, that actually plays so well into the seeking behavior of ‘doomscrolling'). But…..seriously, this is one you want to actually complete in full. The stories are relatable, the point is extremely poignant, and it is so relevant to today! I fear it will become even more relevant with time unless we change.
So give it a listen on your favorite audiobook app, get nostalgic and actually read the physical book, or download it on your Kindle. It's time for change. It's time for love to get louder.
