The Happy Medium Approach

05/07/2025

🧠 “But how do I actually apply the Happy Medium Approach?”
That’s the #1 question we hear.

Because let’s be honest — the Happy Medium Approach isn’t a prescribed protocol.
It’s a paradigm shift in how we understand behavior, respond to it, and co-create safety, flexibility, relationship, and lasting repertoires that actually work in real life.

📲 So… what if you had a chat bot to support you — both proactively and in the moment?

💡 Imagine a tool that helps you:
✔️ Translate behavior through an appetitive vs. aversive lens
✔️ See patterns using non-linear contingency analysis
✔️ Understand emotions as contingency descriptors
✔️ Generate micro-shaping ideas that build flexibility without blowing the pressure valve
✔️ Set up non-coercive teaching environments
✔️ Access tools like the Noticing Grid, DNA-V, and ABC Skill Access with a tap
✔️ Get on-the-fly suggestions for Happy Medium Language pairings

🌀 Because this kind of work takes judgment, not checklists…
And on the hard days, we all need a gentle nudge back toward curiosity over control.

Would a Happy Medium Chat Bot be helpful to you?

🟩 Yes! This would be a game-changer
🟨 Maybe—depends on how it works
🟥 Not for me—I prefer other kinds of support
💬 I have ideas or requests! (Drop them in the comments 👇)

05/02/2025

🧠 For BCBAs and Educators Who Are Ready to Rethink Demand Avoidance

Supporting Individuals with Persistent Demand Avoidance and High Anxiety
📚 A CEU Course by the Happy Medium Approach
👩‍🏫 Led by Rosalie Prendergast, MS BCBA, IBA, NL Level 1

You don’t have to “believe” in PDA as a diagnosis to recognize a very real pattern:
📉 Escape-maintained behavior that becomes rigid, pervasive, and resistant to traditional strategies.
🤯 Individuals who are bright and capable—yet increasingly withdrawn, oppositional, or dysregulated when approached with traditional expectations.

This training isn’t about labels. It’s about functional relations.

We invite you to take a closer look—through the lens of:

🔍 Goldiamond’s Nonlinear Contingency Analysis
🔍 Kantor’s Interbehaviorism
🔍 Layng’s Emotional Contingency Descriptors
🔍 Contemporary Skill-Based & Consent-Driven Models

You’ll learn to ask:
→ What if persistent avoidance is a rational adaptation to aversive histories?
→ What if “noncompliance” is the only remaining functional option in a narrow field of contingencies?

We’re not pathologizing kids—we’re clarifying context.

—

🧠 Course Details
🗓️ June 10 – July 15 | Tuesdays | 2:30–4:30 PM MT
📍 Live on Zoom + Lifetime Replay
📘 Includes a printable, interactive workbook
🎓 12 CEUs (4 Ethics • 4 Supervision • 4 General)

—

🎯 Built for behavior analysts and educators who value:
✔️ Contextual sensitivity over cookie-cutter protocols
✔️ Autonomy and assent within the 7 Dimensions of ABA
✔️ Constructive, trauma-informed, and dignity-driven practices

This isn’t about abandoning science. It’s about using better science to reach the learners we’re still missing.

🌐 Register now → https://www.happymediumapproach.com/purchase/226993-Rewriting-the-Rules-Principles-Over/price/808839-single-seat

04/30/2025

🧠 Principle 2

The therapeutic context is shaped by reciprocal contingencies. Relationships serve as dynamic, mutual environments of change.
(Goldiamond, 1974; Layng, 2009)

📣 In behavior analysis, behavior doesn't occur in isolation—it happens in a dynamic field of interaction. Support is most effective when both people are influencing and adapting to one another.

🔊 A 10-year-old shuts down during group work.
Initially, prompting and praise were used to increase participation—but the behavior persisted.

Instead of escalating intervention, we ask:
→ How might our behavior be influencing theirs?
→ What contingencies are we reinforcing in this interaction?

🌿 In HMA, we recognize ourselves as part of the environment—and shift from control to cooperation.

🧩 Response:
“Hey, I noticed this part might feel tricky. Want to work with just me today or help plan how we do this next time?”

✅ Doable Step:
Later, involve the student in structuring the group task—offering role flexibility, smaller groups, or co-created norms.

🔁 We adapt together. Change is a mutual process—never one-sided.

🧏‍♀️ A non-speaking teen resists physical prompting during transitions.
Rather than implementing hands-down procedures or compliance-based prompts, we reflect:
→ Is our approach escalating aversive control?
→ What signal is this individual giving us?

🌱 In HMA, we pause to observe and offer space for autonomy.

🧩 Response:
“I’ll wait right here. When you’re ready, just give me the sign we practiced. We’ll go when it works for you.”

✅ Doable Step:
Later, use co-developed gestures or visual cues that empower the learner to initiate transitions on their terms.

🔁 Support is shaped together. Relationships are dynamic environments of change—in both directions.

What different principles could be in play given these two situations?

04/19/2025

“Principles are context-independent but function-dependent. A principle only holds value when applied with contextual sensitivity.”
(Kantor, 1981; Skinner, 1953)

📣 “A good principle is a good principle—but only if it fits the context.”
In behavior analysis, context isn’t just background—it’s part of the contingency.

✨ What this looks like in practice:

🔊 A 9-year-old says, “This is stupid!” when given a group reading task.
This child reads for hours on their own—so we pause and ask:
→ Have we observed all the contingencies at play?
→ Why is the child moving away from something they usually approach?

🌿 In the Happy Medium Approach, we shift from protocol to context-sensitive engagement, adjusting the balance so appetitive contingencies outweigh aversives.

🧩 Response:
“Looks like this group thing might feel overwhelming. Want to read with me—or start with your favorite comic?”

✅ Doable Step:
Later, co-create a reading plan or offer choice about how and when participation feels approachable.

🧏‍♀️ A 13-year-old throws their AAC device when prompted to label emotions.
Rather than targeting “property destruction,” we ask:
→ What’s the balance of appetitive vs. aversive contingencies?
→ Has emotional labeling been tied to pressure or coercion?

🌱 In HMA, we prioritize relational safety and availability for learning.

🧩 Response:
“No pressure. Let’s just sit together. I’m here if you want to show me anything—device or not.”

✅ Doable Step:
Later, try shared visuals or gestures. You might invite them to label your emotion first.

💭 What principles would guide this step based on the learner’s history and current context?

🔁 We don’t impose learning. We shape the conditions where learning becomes safe, accessible, and meaningful—in alignment with the 7 Dimensions of ABA.

04/17/2025

🧠 Behind every strategy we use in the Happy Medium Approach, there’s a deeper layer—a principle.

Not a protocol.
Not a checklist.
A function-based, human-centered principle drawn from the science of behavior and the art of relationship.

💡 Over the next few months, we’ll be sharing the guiding principles that form the backbone of the Happy Medium Approach—each one rooted in the work of pioneers like Skinner, Kantor, Goldiamond, Layng, S. Hayes, Sandoz, L. Hayes, Ciarrochi, Barnes-Holmes, Kolu, Hanley, Rajaraman, and adapted for real-life relational support.

You’ll see:
✅ Why these principles matter in practice
✅ How they differ from rigid behavioral protocols
✅ How they support autonomy, flexibility, and connection—especially for neurodivergent individuals
✅ And what it looks like to apply them in the moment, not just on paper

✨ Whether you're a BCBA, educator, parent, or paraprofessional—these principles offer a new lens on behavior that is relational, compassionate, contextual, and constructional.

Because meaningful support doesn’t start with a script.
It starts with a relationship.
And it’s built from the inside out.

🧭 Follow along as we unpack each one, with science, story, and framework.

07/22/2024

muito apreço! e deliciosas sobremesas! production team and all the participants heart felt gratitude for hosting such a wonderful 2 day conference and bring HMA to Brazil!

04/17/2024

The PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance) behavioral profile is a very hot subject right now in the US. The individuals who are often categorized under this over arching verbal label do not respond well to linear behaviorism, and it is frequently harmful to individuals who demonstrate these particular clusters of behavior under aversive or coercive control. They need relational, flexible, non-linear supports that aim to resources support and gently build new repertoires of behavior. The presentation attached is a little intro to resourcing supports for individuals who are categorized under the persistent demand for autonomy (PDA) label!

https://www.canva.com/design/DAGClwrxPRs/WOMBLYS1-tVx_wFlLAKM5w/view?utm_content=DAGClwrxPRs&utm_campaign=designshare&utm_medium=link&utm_source=editor

03/15/2024

The ACT Matrix is a lovely tool that looks incredibly complex but is really very simple. What do you notice?

The noticing takes place walking around this matrix looking a few repertoires of behavior: What is meaningful to me? What aversive mental experiencing shows up and gets in the way? What do I do to get relief from the aversive events? What do I do to move towards the things that are meaningful to me?

As a person using this tool as a resourced support for Neurodivergent individuals or humans in general, it is ok if they don't notice any of these repertoires of their own behavior. These are challenging areas to notice, and even more challenging to shift. Take it slow and offer noticing support where it will be helpful, and also be ok with their individualized pace of noticing and shifting.

As a helper, sometimes it seems obvious to us what needs to be noticed and easy to get into the space of, duh, "just deploy a different behavior to move towards what is meaningful to you." or offer a teaching moment, "what different behavior could you use to move towards what is meaningful?". These are moments for us as the helper to notice our own behavior as the supporter and discriminate whether it is helpful or not!

A helpful Matrix exercise for supporters is to, simply, do a daily Matrix for a few weeks. What do you notice?!

03/13/2024

The Relentless Parent is a nice parenting paradigm shift! If you are a provider supporting parents or a parent yourself. This workbook can be a helpful addition to your journey of supporting yourself and your neurodivergent child simultaneously.

More about the workbook!

Parenting a neurodivergent child is a beautiful and rewarding journey, but it can also be quite challenging. As a parent, you may find yourself torn between meeting your own needs and those of your child. It's important to find the happy medium and show up authentically for yourself and your child in a consistent and evidence-informed way. That's where The Relentless Parent, a Happy Medium Approach guide, comes in to support you on this journey.

Being a parent of a neurodivergent child can sometimes feel overwhelming, with its fair share of stress and difficulties. However, by developing psychological flexibility, you can navigate these challenges with grace and resilience.

One of the key aspects of being a Relentless Parent is understanding your child's unique needs. Every child is wonderfully unique, and it's crucial to recognize and respect their individuality. This means taking the time to truly listen to your child, seeking to understand their perspective, and responding to their needs from a place of psychological flexibility.

The Relentless Parent is not just a guide; it's a powerful tool for parents who want to show up authentically for themselves and their children in a consistent and evidence-informed way. Through developing psychological flexibility, understanding your child's needs, finding that elusive balance, and staying informed, you can become an even more effective and authentic parent.

Remember, the wellbeing of both you and your child matters. The Relentless Parent is here to support you on this journey, offering a warm embrace and a guiding hand. Embrace this approach, and watch as it transforms your parenting experience, bringing you closer to self-discovery and acceptance. You are seen, valued, and never alone on this beautiful and challenging journey of parenthood.


Here is the link to purchase the workbook!

The Relentless Parent: A Happy Medium Approach guide to showing up authentically for yourself and your child in a consistent, evidence informed way. (The Happy Medium Approach)

03/10/2024

APBA New Orleans! I had the absolute pleasure of hosting a panel for these amazing parents first and BCBA second. They put their hearts on their sleeves with self compassion to share with us how we can do better in our role of supporting caregivers with neurodivergent humans! Not only a human first account, but neurodivergent voices sharing with us how to do better! Check it out on behavior live!

02/05/2024

And just like that KOH 2024 in the books! There are not enough words to adequately describe the genuine AMAZINGNESS of family!

Arriving on the lakebed with a 0 horse power, unhappy, spitting fire, and overall temperamental Tiffany emotions were heavy and hard to carry. With the power of a people first and a don’t quit attitude our team old and new pulled together to put 5 race cars out on the track for some of the hardest racing around. So proud of all the drivers and co drivers (Thomas Prendergast John Dicus Steve Graff Joe Gatlin Jesse Clark Steve Fredericks Austin Sarah Larson Kevin Larson Nora Prendergast). Congrats to Steve and Austin, Nora, Joe and Jesse for the amazing finishes! Tom had some epic desert fun while stretching Tiffany’s new found horse power! Sarah had a blast in Yolo until she was stopped in her track by another Bug seemingly confused on course direction🤷🏼‍♀️.

A heartfelt thank you to Jan from for making an unplanned journey to the California desert and taking a big risk on an unknown race team to get Tiffany settled and shining like the dimond she is! Jan joined our team during a time of utter disappointment and frustration. Jan walked with us through the tuning data to make the challenging call to embark on an entire rewire for Tiffany. Jan found the parts and overnighted them to JV. Then our amazing team pulled together completing the rewire in 5 hour (record time by the way) on the lakebed.

for the exceptional wiring support and the fine tooth comb making sure all the cars were in their best possible shape for race day.

Special thanks to HD Signs Colorado for showing up in full force and making our team pop where ever we went! Including some pre race touch ups and additions. Not to mention some great company and laughs! for the extra hand.

for the amazing support!

for capturing the epic emotion filled adventure of KOH through the lens of a camera, lots of miles, and the unforgiving elements of the lakebed.

Our people make the magic happen being kind, curious, and supportive of each other no matter how each of us show up moment to moment.

KOH reminds us every year to find our happy medium and within ourselves and interconnected relationships. See you in Montana race family!

Ps…Nora found a bit of joy behind the steering wheel of both Scout and Yolo only staling out a few times😉

01/16/2024

Have you checked in with you or your child's repertoires of thinking in your head and talking out loud!

https://youtu.be/XkiPkA4RJlw

Link to a free consultation: https://www.happymediumapproach.com/meeting-scheduling-strategy-session

Theory of mind says that we should be about to with some degree of certainly predict what another person is thinking based on body language and contextual cu...