Brook L. McKay, Therapy

Brook L. McKay, Therapy Brook L. McKay is a limited license psychologist providing individual and couples therapy (telehealth/online therapy services only).

LEARN. When to walk away. We have all been in relationships (past and present) where we repeatedly feel unappreciated, d...
08/25/2025

LEARN. When to walk away. We have all been in relationships (past and present) where we repeatedly feel unappreciated, disrespected, unheard and taken for granted. We may remain in these relationships and make excuses for doing such because we think things might eventually change if we keep trying. But why do this to ourselves?!?⁣
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Most therapists in my field would attest to the importance of teaching clients about the power of creating healthy boundaries. Similar to the movement termed ‘quiet quitting’, it is about realizing your worth and consciously disengaging and removing yourself from a space where you are not fully valued. Understand walking away is not about punishing someone else, but setting yourself free to embrace healthy relationships where you are truly valued and supported.⁣
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Homework: Assess the relationships in your life. Do any fall into the category of ‘walking away’? If so, it may be time to do just that – walk away.⁣
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PATTERNS. Just as a kaleidoscope reflects an array of colorful patterns, so do we, in a metaphorical sense. Our lives re...
08/18/2025

PATTERNS. Just as a kaleidoscope reflects an array of colorful patterns, so do we, in a metaphorical sense. Our lives revolve around patterns, whether healthy or unhealthy. We develop schemas or patterns of behavior to interpret how we perceive the world, how we interact with others and how we make decisions.⁣
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But how do we break patterns that don’t serve us well? More so, how do we change the outcome? First, you need to recognize a particular pattern is not good for your well-being by taking a step back and looking at it with an outsider’s perspective. Next, determine if this pattern enhances or detracts from your life. If the pattern has negative consequences, then determine what needs to change to have a healthier outcome. It might mean talking to someone else for support and solutions, but at the very least, it is about doing things differently to get a different outcome.⁣
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Homework: Identify one pattern of behavior that does not enhance your life. Change one small part of this pattern and see if you get a different outcome.⁣
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Photo credit: My beautiful mom.⁣
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ROOTS. Think of your relationship or relationships as a tree. There are the roots that keep a tree grounded and the bran...
08/11/2025

ROOTS. Think of your relationship or relationships as a tree. There are the roots that keep a tree grounded and the branches that allow the tree to grow. The banyan tree, unlike other trees, forms roots above ground better known as aerial roots. These aerial roots drop down off the branches of the banyan tree and appear as if ‘strangling’ the host tree, but they are in fact supporting the tree’s large extended canopy of branches.⁣
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Applying this to relationships, we all want to feel supported by our partner, family or friends and in turn support their growth. Everything is linked and interconnected. When we develop strong roots and supportive relationships, we flourish.⁣
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Homework: Name the top 3 supportive relationships in your life. Now, text/call this person to thank them for their support.⁣
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COLLECTION. There is something psychological to be said about collecting things. Whether books, art, records, magnets, l...
08/04/2025

COLLECTION. There is something psychological to be said about collecting things. Whether books, art, records, magnets, letters or whatever you fancy, what is the reason? For some it is retaining a piece of history and nostalgia, while for others it might give them a sense of purpose and belonging among others who share the same interest.⁣
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Whatever the reason, for any collector the coolest bit is the story behind the collection. There is a piece of an individual’s identity revealed in each item as if assembling a puzzle. I know when I select a postcard collected from my world travels, I am instantly transported back to that place and the experiences that ensued; each one holds meaning and a special place in my timeline continuum. Whether a hobby or obsession, collecting is the psychological pleasure of procuring something that has meaning in your life.⁣
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Homework: What do you collect and why? Answer in comments.⁣
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Photo credit: My son and I spent hours assembling this miniature bookstore; never again.⁣
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QUIRKS. So often we spend countless energy trying to fit in and hide what aspects of ourselves we think others might con...
07/28/2025

QUIRKS. So often we spend countless energy trying to fit in and hide what aspects of ourselves we think others might consider ‘weird’. In a recent article in Psychology Today, it discusses how our individual quirks are what distinguishes us from others. Rather than our quirks being perceived as defects, quirks are viewed as strengths, if we choose to embrace them.⁣
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Take for example someone who is an overthinker. This is the person in the classroom or at work meetings who asks one too many questions, while others wait impatiently to be dismissed. This individual might eventually refrain from asking questions to avoid others getting annoyed, but this quirk is in fact the very strength that makes this person a successful project engineer. Just remember, we are all perfectly imperfect and unique, so embrace your quirkiness.⁣
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Homework: What is one of your quirks? How can you use this quirk as a strength?⁣
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NB: Full ‘Quirks Are Superpowers’ article @ psychologytoday.com/nz/articles/202505/why-your-quirks-are-your-superpowers⁣
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COMMUNITY. We all like to feel as though we have belonging, that we matter and we are connected to others. Having a sens...
07/21/2025

COMMUNITY. We all like to feel as though we have belonging, that we matter and we are connected to others. Having a sense of community and interconnectedness ensures we don’t feel as though we are going through life alone. Now more than ever, we need community and experiencing such is vital for our psychological well-being⁣.
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Homework: Join a club or organization with people who share your values and find your community. ⁣
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RELAXATION. Self-care IS essential business. A relaxation technique I learned as a music therapist and now use with clie...
07/14/2025

RELAXATION. Self-care IS essential business. A relaxation technique I learned as a music therapist and now use with clients as a psychologist is guided imagery and music (GIM). To implement on your own, take 5+ minutes during the day or just before going to sleep to play one or more of the instrumental songs below (eyes closed) and allow your imagination to take you on a visual journey.⁣
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Short self-directed GIM - join the image/focus with the music (feel free to choose your own image/focus or a different instrumental song):⁣
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1. Focus: Evening Sky⁣
Music: Respighi "The Nightingale"⁣
2. Focus: Water Scene⁣⁣
Music: Grief, "Morning" from the Peer Gynt Suite⁣
3. Focus: In the Hills/Mountains⁣
Music: Respighi "The Dove"⁣
4. Focus: Favorite Place/Happy Place⁣
Music: Debussy "Clare de lune"⁣
5. Focus: Open Meadow⁣
Music: Elgar "Ni**od from Enigma Variations"⁣
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Homework: Find inner peace.⁣
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⁣COEXIST. In a relationship we each bring our own uniqueness and individuality, but somehow, we have to operate as a tea...
06/30/2025

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COEXIST. In a relationship we each bring our own uniqueness and individuality, but somehow, we have to operate as a team. This is the hard part. You may be the extrovert with the introvert or the risk taker with the overly cautious. Whatever ying-yang of attraction, it is about being fully accepted by the other person just as you are and vice versa. It boils down to respecting differences with intention and appreciation for what the other person brings to the relationship. Similarly, I might not be a shark, but I need to coexist by respecting their habitat as WE swim together.⁣
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Homework: Ask, what unique qualities do you appreciate in your relationship?⁣
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Photo credit:
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RENEWAL. Every ending is a gateway to a new beginning. The key is taking what we learned at the end and applying it to o...
06/23/2025

RENEWAL. Every ending is a gateway to a new beginning. The key is taking what we learned at the end and applying it to our future self in order to grow as an individual. ⁣
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Homework: Think about what you learned at the end of an impactful experience (i.e., relationship break-up, job ending, loss of a loved one)? Apply it to your renewal phase. ⁣
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NB: The Tree of Life sculpture is a symbol of renewal created by USS Arizona Memorial architect, Alfred Preis in order to inspire contemplation. ⁣
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06/16/2025

NEEDS. It is fair to say we all need love and support in order to feel secure. This is not a one-way street. It is mutual, reciprocal and unconditional. We all have moments where we are not able to do it alone and asking for help is a vulnerable option because then we feel dependent. Newsflash, asking for help makes most people feel vulnerable, but in actual fact it displays great self-awareness and self-acceptance that we need others. Whether it be a father (PSA: Happy Father’s Day), a child, a partner and so on; there is the need to be loved and the need to love others. Without this, we lose hope and purpose.⁣
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Homework: Ask yourself who needed you and who you needed in your life?⁣

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NB: “You Needed Me” lyrics were written by Randy Goodrum and first recorded and sung by well-known Canadian artist in 1978 (it reached No. 1 on the Billboard Hot 100 charts that same year). Goodrum described the song as ‘unconditional undeserved love’. Anne Murray knew it would be a hit the moment she came across listening to it on a demo tape and it did.⁣
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#1978 ⁣
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SOLITUDE. It is about being alone, without being lonely. Solitude differs from loneliness with the latter feeling as tho...
06/01/2025

SOLITUDE. It is about being alone, without being lonely. Solitude differs from loneliness with the latter feeling as though something is missing rather than being your own best company. Taking some time for yourself is essential for better life balance. It provides you the opportunity to self-reflect, recharge and renew your sense of self. If you don’t believe me, ask this fur seal.⁣
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Homework: Take some time this week for you, and only you.⁣
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SYMBIOTIC. Mushrooms have long been touted for their hallucinogenic effects, but this particular species (fly agaric) is...
05/26/2025

SYMBIOTIC. Mushrooms have long been touted for their hallucinogenic effects, but this particular species (fly agaric) is actually poisonous. Despite this, on a more positive note, it forms a symbiotic relationship with trees by wrapping around the roots and supplying them with nutrients and in return receiving sugars from the trees.⁣
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There are many examples of symbiotic or interdependent relationships between two different organisms in nature (e.g., bees/flowers, clownfish/sea anemones). But what about symbiosis in human relationships? When it comes to humans, it is about developing healthy interdependence within our romantic relationships, family dynamics and friendships.

Know the difference, especially in romantic relationships:⁣
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🌿 Healthy Symbiosis = two people support each other emotionally while still maintaining their own identities (mutual respect for boundaries, support each other without excessive control, closeness without losing your independence)⁣
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🔥 Unhealthy Symbiosis = when one or both people lose their sense of self or make decisions based on the other’s emotions, needs or desires rather than their own (inability to make independent decisions, sacrifice personal goals to maintain the relationship, fear of conflict because it threatens emotional security, over-dependence)⁣
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Homework: Identify one example of a healthy and unhealthy symbiotic relationship (or part of a relationship) in your life.⁣
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Address

22757 Woodward Avenue
Ferndale, MI
48220

Opening Hours

Monday 8am - 8pm
Tuesday 8am - 8pm
Wednesday 8am - 8pm
Thursday 8am - 8pm
Friday 8am - 12pm

Telephone

+12487024907

Website

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Brook is a limited licensed psychologist with a background in music therapy. She has over 15 years' experience working with a diverse range of individuals, couples and families experiencing relationship difficulties, depression, and/or anxiety.

While Brook treats a wide range of issues, she specializes in working with relationship or marital issues and couples with special needs children; primarily autistic children. She is currently providing Autism Evaluations using the Autism Diagnostic Observation Schedule, Second Edition (ADOS-2).

Brook's therapeutic approach is as unique as each of her clients who make the proactive decision to receive professional support and invest in their well-being. Currently, she is seeing private clients and performing autism evaluations in Ferndale, Michigan.

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