07/09/2025
As an introvert, I still felt so lonely and triggered when I was by myself -- especially without a distraction. It was hard to understand and to explain to others because I didn't want to have to do anything, be anywhere, or talk to people but I also didn't want to be alone.
The night was the hardest because I would lay in bed and think about my cycles, my grief, and what should be happening but isn't. For some reason I was most aware of my empty womb when I laying down at night. And the grief was so loud.
Here are some things that have helped me or helped clients of mine who struggle with their grief in this way:
🌙 Put a lamp next to your bed that way you can lessen the amount of lighting in the room in stages (big light, lamp, etc)
🌙 Communicate with your partner and create a plan that makes you feel safer at night, especially if falling asleep is a difficult part for you
🌙 Night lights aren't just for children - they can help our nervous system not feel under attack when we have trauma
🤍 make plans with friends that feel safe / someone you can cancel with last minute without drama / someone who feels safe even if your plans are just to sit in the discomfort of grief
🤍 if you have a partner, plans dates ahead with your partner that way you have things on the calendar
🤍 if being home alone is a trigger, on days where you're by yourself -- go to a park, a public place, bring a book, headphones, a journal and just exist
Unfortunately for all of us -- grief is so much work and that part truly sucks. Let's find ways to feel the grief without making it heavier and heavier.
If you've found something that helps this specific aspect of grief, comment below 📲
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