06/09/2025
Autism.
It's been in the news a lot recently.
What I am hearing these days makes my head spin. There are so many
differing viewpoints and feelings surrounding this word – autism.
All I know is that our story is ours alone. We live it every day; the good, the
hard, the exhausting and the humorous. Let me tell you about our autism.
Autism was not a word that entered our life until our Andrew was 3 years old.
We knew there were some delays in his speech and in his development. Our
dear friend, Jennifer lovingly suggested we have him evaluated by First Steps
Intervention. “It can't hurt, “she said. Andrew was 2 when we had speech,
OT, and developmental therapists in our home three times a week. Andrew's
first word was, “Go!” And, he has been on the go ever since.
The early years were exhausting. Andrew never sat still. He was in constant
motion. Potty training was daunting. He was 6 before he was fully trained
and 12 before he could stay dry at night. Andrew loved Blue Clue's, Wheel of
Fortune, and crayons. He would carry crayons firmly in his fi**ed grip all day.
Food was a fight. He had an aversion to certain foods; anything creamy like
mac and cheese. It caused a gag reflux that forced us to make two meals and
we allowed him to eat in a different room. He could not (and still cannot)
communicate if he was in pain or feeling sick.
Andrew also began ABA (Applied Behavior Analysis). I know this isn't for
everyone, but for us, it was a game changer. We started at a small center that
met in a church. When, that center closed, we began going to Children's
Autism Center. It was there that we met some of the most special people.
They were able to use those things Andrew loved like Blue's Clues to make
connections. One of his therapists, Anyssa put Blue's Clues paw prints on all
the clocks in the center to help Andrew tell time. This also allowed him to
notice other things and people around those clocks. Another therapist, Logan
made a connection with him immediately and made going to therapy fun. She
now works with him as a young adult. Logan helps Andrew with social
outings, gives him strategies to curb his impulsive behaviors and lets him
play Disney music in her car.
In spite of his challenges with communication, food, noises and lack of
awareness, Andrew is also full of joy. He is happy, funny and kind. Andrew
thinks a hug can solve everything. When I am crying or frustrated, he will
say, “Aww...give Mom a hug. All better! Not sad anymore!” He learned to
read by watching Wheel of Fortune and plays the computer game for hours.
He can communicate things by quoting lines from his favorite movies and
shows. You have to listen closely, or you'll miss the connection he is trying to
make.
Because of our faith, Andrew is deeply loved by God, has intrinsic value and
a purpose in this life. We, as a family and our friends are constantly trying to
give him a great life, full of experiences out in the community and at home.
Sometimes that looks like speed walking our zoo in his best Go Diego, Go
safari outfit. Other times, it looks like watching Toy Story for the 100th time.
We continually push Andrew to do his very best. He works so hard to please
his favorite teachers, to keep his hands to himself when someone is
screaming instead of hitting them, to stay focused at a job and to fit in a
world that is full of smells and sounds that are like nails on a chalkboard to
him.
And I don't need to know a cause for autism. That won't change anything for
Andrew. But what I do want is more funding, more resources and
opportunities for our young adults on the spectrum to thrive as they get older.
Andrew is 21 years old now. He still loves Blue's Clues and Wheel of
Fortune. He is still in constant motion. He has one more year of school which
has brought him joy, friendships, a special needs dance group that performs at
school and competitions and the security of routine. We have no idea what
life will look like after high school. It's terrifying, actually. But, just like
when Andrew was younger, we will continue to work hard to find places for
him that bring him joy, friendships and routine. Autism has not destroyed us.
It has only made us stronger.
Autism looks different for every person and family with a diagnosis. For us,
the word autism means a disability not a disease. We will fight to find him a
place in this world. And we will find joy in the journey; in the hard, in the
differences, and in Andrew. Andrew has made me a better mom, a better
teacher, a better friend and a better listener. Our family is better because of
him. And, for that I am thankful.
-Becky Hansen, Andrew's Mother
