Catalyze Therapy and Wellness PLLC

04/29/2022

What need is younger you missing? Be kind💚

04/29/2022

For lovers of our sensitive ones 💚

04/12/2022

-- Re-found thoughts from 6 years ago. Today I would add, apply this as you look to forgive yourself too. It's okay 💚 --

Bit of a lengthy post, but I feel as thought it could be worth someone's time to read.

I've been thinking a lot about forgiveness lately.

In a society that most commonly best understands and deals with the world through opposing attitudes, arguments, and offense, forgiveness has become a thing forgotten by many. So I find myself sitting to ponder...why?

Why was 2015 dubbed 'The Year of Offense'? Why have people become so touchy? Why are people so outwardly hateful? Why are so many so much more quick to judge? And while I am aware that selfishness has been present before, it seems as though currently it is rampant, and it is commonplace.

We live in a individualistic society. We are told to take care of ourselves first, and figure someone else will pick up after us. We thrive on furthering ourselves. We focus on successes, the next best thing, and money. And through all this we become offended and defensive at the slight movement of opposition. We get hot and heated at the very idea of a differing view. We hate. We name-call. We make sure to raise the decibels of our argument higher than others, because heaven help us if we were to be faced with being wrong. God forbid us from ever not coming out on top. May we all hastily deliver the biggest and best ideas, opinions, and knowledge. Whatever the cost, "you do you."

But after the dust settles, we pack the aftermath of each other and what's left of our own ideas in bags and carry it around with us to unpack later. We bring it back out inside homes, social situations, and god help us, social media. But why?

We hold on because forgiveness has become but a memory. We fear change. We fear change in and around ourselves. Someone thinks differently than you do and you notice it? Make sure you change their ideas to yours, and do it quick...Otherwise the world is soon going to hell, right? Well, according to you. But you're always right. Right?

Forgiveness will never change another person. It will always change you. You can't change people's attitudes, beliefs, or minds if they don't want you to. You can't make someone into something they are not. All you can do is adapt. Mold. Morph. Forgive. People out there? They'll be the same.

In my case, they will continue to be hurtful. Hateful. Selfish. But forgiveness has nothing to do with them or that. It has to do with me. When I wake up in the morning, and I deal with them that day, how do I do it? Do I spout hate? Do I feed arguments? Do I remember how much I differ from an individual in my values and mindset?

No. Just don't.

At the end of the day, is it all worth it?
Rising heart rates, bubbling emotions, anger, frustration, hurt, attitudes.
Is that really who you want to be?

Maybe they do. But the good news is, you don't have to be.
There is much more to live for than that, and for god's sake, there is much more to live for than yourself.
Forgiveness is not for them. It's for you.
Go in peace today.

03/31/2022

03/27/2022

Graphic credit: The Therapist Parent

03/22/2022

Graphic Credit: WholeHearted School Counseling

03/07/2022

❤

02/15/2022

01/31/2022

"Maybe this is exactly the home you wanted before you knew Pinterest existed…

Maybe you were a wonderful mom before fifteen internet sensation parenting experts told you, you were doing it all wrong, in all different ways…

Maybe your house felt kept up, before you fell down the rabbit hole of tap to tidys and marathon extreme deep cleans…

Maybe the birthday parties you hosted were sweet, until you found the YouTube videos of gender reveals more elaborate than your own wedding…

Maybe what you’re consuming is what’s consuming you…

Maybe half the battle for contentment could be won, simply by choosing to live joyfully in the reality of our own lives, and not the snap shots of someone else’s…

Enough is enough. ❤️🏠"

https://www.instagram.com/p/CZHrBr8pPiV/

01/26/2022

source:

01/18/2022

THERE IS MORE FOR YOU

There is more for you
than what never showed up.
More than what never came to be.
More than what couldn’t transpire
or find a way to work out,
and it looks like healing
and shaped like possibility.
Let down by family or parents,
past dreams and expectations.
Put off by relationships,
romances, careers and ideations.
There’s another path to explore
and alternate routes to travel.
There’s a tribe meant to welcome,
with encouragements to fuel you.
There are hearts that want to hold you,
and kindnesses that long to see you through.
There are other ways to meet with love,
as kinships waiting in the wings.
There are fresh fields to run in
and warm pools to swim.
Hold on bright child,
there is more than
what never appeared...
❤️

(-quote and caption written by Susan Frybort)

01/18/2022

🌱

11/28/2021

Words are power. Build them up! 🥺😍

11/24/2021

It's getting colder outside, here's another tip to lessen stress and increase effective communication with your little ones 😊

11/16/2021

How to contain and quell fires!

It's easy to jump in and try to reason with our kids when they don't handle something well or need to learn something. But we know some things about the brain here that can really help you to stay connected with your child AND help them learn better.

I talk about it using the Brain Stoplight metaphor.

First we need to Regulate. We need to connect and get out of the red light state (my language) or our survival brain.

Then we need to connect in the emotional space. "It makes sense why you reacted that way. I'm sorry. I didn't know you were having a hard time..." The point is to connect. This is the yellow light or the emotional brain. We need to speak to that next.

And then, and only then, are you and your child back to green light and can reason.

Regulate.
Relate.
Reason.

In that order.

This is how our brains work and how our children's brains work. Work with these ideas and see how it transforms your family's conflicts. Works for partners, too!

ETA: Image or information courtesy of Beacon House Therapeutic Services & Trauma Team | 2021 | www.beaconhouse.org.uk

11/15/2021