Judith Seehafer, MA, LMFT, CSAT

02/19/2023

Wow! Wisdom of the day 😊

12/26/2022

❤️

If it’s your calling it will keep calling you.

12/16/2022

Be still & listen. ✨

03/31/2022

For some, it's using a codeword like "avocado."
For others, it might be raising their hands.
It may be just saying, "I'm feeling overwhelmed and need a break."

All of these, as silly as they may sound, are a chance to stop stonewalling in its tracks. The antidote to stonewalling is to stop, drop, and soothe.

Before conflict even begins, agree on a neutral signal that will call a stop to the conversation. When that signal is invoked, drop the conversation for a few minutes to give everyone a chance to cool off. Then take that time to do something to soothe yourself before returning to the conversation.

What kind of a signal do you use with your partner when you need a break?

This post is not meant to address situations of abuse. Social media is not a substitute for individualized support.

01/05/2022

Does your relationship need some extra spice? Hear four steps to reboot your romance on Small Things Often: http://bit.ly/SmallThingsOften

06/27/2021

06/27/2021

To heal a wound you must stop scratching it. Paulo Coelho

06/16/2021

Good advice, copied from a friend, ❤️❤️❤️

DEPRESSION TIPS 🤍🤍

Shower. Not a bath, a shower. Use water as hot or cold as you like. You don’t even need to wash. Just get in under the water and let it run over you for a while. Sit on the floor if you gotta.

Moisturize everything. Use whatever lotion you like. Unscented? Dollar store lotion? Fancy 48 hour lotion that makes you smell like a field of wildflowers? Use whatever you want, and use it all over your entire dermis.

Put on clean, comfortable clothes.

Put on your favorite underwear. Cute black lacy panties? Those ridiculous boxers you bought last christmas with candy cane hearts on the butt? Put them on.

Drink cold water. Use ice. If you want, add some mint or lemon for an extra boost. I always use lemon.

Clean something. Doesn’t have to be anything big. Organize one drawer of a desk. Wash five dirty dishes. Do a load of laundry. Scrub the bathroom sink.

Blast music. Listen to something upbeat and dancey and loud, something that’s got lots of energy. Sing to it, dance to it, even if you suck at both.

Make food. Don’t just grab a granola bar to munch. Take the time and make food. Even if it’s ramen. Add something special to it, like a soft boiled egg or some veggies. Prepare food, it tastes way better, and you’ll feel like you accomplished something.

Make something. Write a short story or a poem, draw a picture, color a picture, fold origami, crochet or knit, sculpt something out of clay, anything artistic. Even if you don’t think you’re good at it. Create.

Go outside. Take a walk. Sit in the grass. Look at the clouds. Smell flowers. Put your hands in the dirt and feel the soil against your skin.

Call someone. Call a loved one, a friend, a family member, call a chat service if you have no one else to call. Talk to a stranger on the street. Have a conversation and listen to someone’s voice. If you can’t bring yourself to call, text or email or whatever, just have some social interaction with another person. Even if you don’t say much, listen to them. It helps.

Cuddle your pets if you have them/can cuddle them. Take pictures of them. Talk to them. Tell them how you feel, about your favorite movie, a new game coming out, anything.

May seem small or silly to some, but this list keeps people alive.

*** At your absolute best you won’t be good enough for the wrong people. But at your worst, you’ll still be worth it to the right ones. Remember that. Keep holding on.

*** In case nobody has told you today I love you and you are worth your weight and then some in gold, so be kind to yourself and most of all keep pushing on!!!!

Find something to be grateful for!

May I please get 2 friends or family members to copy and re-post? I am trying to demonstrate that someone is always listening.



1-800-273-8255

Just two. Any two.
Say done.

💚💚💚💚

**copied and pasted, feel free to do the same**

05/27/2021

Your thoughts are POWERFUL. Make them good ones.

05/25/2021

The Five Levels of Attachment by don Miguel Ruiz Jr., a book published by Hierophant Publishing.

Read this FREE extended excerpt from the book to find out:http://www.hierophantpublishing.com/five-levels-attachment-book-don-miguel-ruiz-jr/

03/17/2021

A marriage therapist explains six common marriage problems and offers advice on how to handle them.

03/14/2021

A misunderstood disability.

Here's what to say to your loved one who suffers from invisible chronic pain. Your support can make all the difference.

02/13/2021

Why repair attempts are even more powerful than saying sorry.

02/01/2021

01/30/2021

The smallest exchanges between you and your partner, most of which seem totally irrelevant to your relationship, have the power to ultimately make or break it.

Give close attention to how you and your partner interpret each other’s responses to bids— whether this happens consciously or unconsciously—so that you learn exactly how to create positive change in your own relationship. Keep in mind that bids occur in our relationships constantly. Bids range from kisses on the cheek and asking “do you want to watch a movie?” to a heavy sigh and sharing about a difficult interaction at work.

As you begin to engage with your partner in healthy styles of communication, the two of you may be surprised to see what a difference the smallest exchanges can make. Read more about why you should turn towards instead of away: http://bit.ly/39uT0Go

01/28/2021

Have you ever reflected on an argument you had with your partner and just thought, “We do not get each other”? Or maybe you find yourself wondering, “Why does this matter so much to them? Why can’t they see it from my perspective?” Or even, “Why does this matter so much to me?”

The latest release from the Gottman Relationship Coach, Dealing with Conflict, is here to help you uncover the answers to those questions and more.

Every individual is unique, which means every relationship is an equally singular combination of dreams, opinions, viewpoints, and proclivities. Dive deep into the inner world of your relationship and gain an understanding of each other to ease communication and conflict—only on our new Gottman Connect platform.

Purchase the Gottman Relationship Coach: Dealing with Conflict today and work toward “getting” each other, even in conflict: http://bit.ly/3iaoR1K

Please note: This post is not intended to address situations of abuse.

01/27/2021

Most people have the wrong idea that “you shouldn’t have to try and make a relationship work”. This is completely wrong!