Eli’s Fight with AML Leukemia

04/08/2026

This.

There’s a version of me
that existed before I lost my baby.

She laughed easier.
She slept better.
She didn’t overthink every little thing.

She believed bad things
happened to other people.

Not her.

I miss her sometimes.

But I also know…

she wouldn’t recognize who I am now.

Because grief changes you
in ways you can’t explain.

It rewires your thoughts.
It hardens parts of you.
It softens others.

It makes you more aware
of how fragile everything really is.

And while I would give anything
to go back…

I can’t.

So I carry both versions of me.

The one I was…
and the one loss forced me to become.

03/31/2026

The world feels alive again,
colors everywhere…
yet a part of me remains in winter without you. 💔

03/31/2026

03/25/2026

Another child got their wings. Please keep Mighty Miller’s family in your prayers 💔👼🙏

01/28/2026

Eli taught me how to be the mom that I am. I don’t think I could be a more loving mom for Lily now. Losing Eli helped me understand how fragile life can be, and now I go through life appreciating all the little things more than I ever would have before. Every moment spent with my baby girl is so precious and I am very grateful for each and every one. My precious gift from Eli sent down from heaven 🧡🩷

The firstborn makes you a parent.❤️

They’re the one you googled everything for.
The one you checked on while they slept.
The one you were terrified to mess up.

They watched you learn how to be a mom in real time,
the nerves, the tears, the trial and error, the growth.

They didn’t get a perfect parent.
They got a parent who was learning, adjusting, and trying every single day.

Before the routines, before the confidence, before you “figured it out,”
there was them.

Your firstborn didn’t just change your life.
They changed you.

01/28/2026

This is awful! It happens in Australia and Canada too 😥

Remember this. In the UK, if your child is critically ill, you have no legal right to be by their bedside. No guaranteed leave. No guaranteed pay. No automatic mental health support when you’re breaking.

You’re expected to:
• sit by a hospital bed
• watch your child suffer
• hold it together
• keep your job
• keep paying the bills

And if you can’t? That’s on you.

This isn’t rare. It happens to thousands of families every year. No parent should have to choose between their child and their livelihood. No parent should be abandoned by the system at the moment their world collapses.

That’s why we are campaigning for change. Because compassion should not depend on your employer.

Parents deserve better.

🧡

01/21/2026

This is so true.

Most people believe that when a child is diagnosed with cancer, the best doctors and researchers are working together to save them.

That's not what's happening.

Hospitals protect their data. Researchers compete for grants instead of sharing breakthroughs. The system isn't designed to cure cancer—it's designed to keep labs open and publications flowing.

Beat Childhood Cancer is changing that. We're an unprecedented allegiance of parents, doctors, and researchers who are taking the fight into our own hands.

Learn more: https://beatcc.org/our-work/

01/19/2026

I never could have imagined how much losing a child would have changed me. I feel like a completely different person from who I once was. I will never feel happiness again like I once did, and although my heart has and will continue to mend somewhat, it will never been fully whole again 💔

🥀 I miss who I was when my soul didn't hurt. When my smile didn’t feel borrowed. When my heart hadn’t learned how to break this deeply. The me who didn’t measure life in before and after. Because the me I am now was built from survival, not choice and I often wonder if I'll ever be her again Grieving Parents

01/15/2026

Eli would have been 3 today! There’s not a day that goes by that we don’t wish he were still here with us. Happy heavenly birthday Eli 🧡🧡🧡

11/22/2025

"Your complaints about your baby tossing in bed is another mama’s wish that her baby was still laying next to her.

Your complaints about your baby waking up early is another mama’s wish that she had a reason to get out of bed.

While you’re passing your baby to anyone willing to hold them, another mama is begging to hold hers.

My child is battling cancer.

Remember to hold your baby extra tight, because some of us mamas can’t."

11/13/2025

The holidays aren’t easy for everyone.

Behind the twinkling lights and holiday music, some hearts are aching.

Some are missing loved ones.
Some are quietly carrying pain, grief, or worry… doing their best just to get through the season.

Let’s be the light for those who feel a little lost in the dark. A kind word, a simple message, or even a small gesture can mean more than we’ll ever know.

Compassion costs nothing,
but it can change everything.

11/03/2025

For most people it’s out of sight, out of mind. If everyone knew how horrible it is, we would be putting a lot more effort into finding cures because there’s not much else worse I can think of than having your child’s life slowly wither away and than watch the life go out of them as you feel them die in your arms 💔

Imagine this. You’ve just been told your child is seriously ill. You drop everything work, home, sleep and move into a hospital room.

Days turn into weeks. Weeks into months.
There’s no mental health support. No financial help. No food provided for you.

Just a half-sleepable bed beside your child’s if you’re lucky. Many parents sleep on two chairs pushed together, or on the floor.

You try to work from the ward so you don’t lose your job. You watch your child go through pain you can’t take away. You’re told to “be strong.”

But what would you do?
How long could you survive like this physically, mentally, emotionally?

For thousands of parents, this is not a story. It’s their life. Every single day.

🦋 It’s Never You because until it happens to you, you can’t imagine it.