Therapywirks of Hermosa Beach

Therapywirks of Hermosa Beach John A. Webber, M.S., MFT - Psychotherapy and Counseling for Adolescents, Adults, Couples and Families My style is direct and active.

I offer psychodynamic and cognitive behavioral based therapy. I work with a wide variety of clients including individual adults who may be living with depression or anxiety, facing crisis with substance abuse, or experiencing a life transition in which therapy can be helpful. I work with couples who are looking to heal and enrich their relationships, and I’m experienced in helping adolescents, who are often in need of assistance during this difficult stage of life. I strongly believe that within each of us is the innate ability to live a positive and fulfilling life. My focus in treatment is to help identify a problem, assist in developing treatment goals, and provide therapeutic relief. I get involved, ask questions, help interpret and participate in therapy sessions. This creates a place where self-actualization can begin to germinate, come alive and eventually become a way of life. I invite you to book a consultation appointment, then visit and enjoy the beautiful view of the Pacific Ocean and begin your journey towards a healthier life. For more information see my website: www.therapywirks.weebly.com

Learning to manage distorted thinking and negative patterns of thought requires practice; that overtime offers relief an...
08/24/2024

Learning to manage distorted thinking and negative patterns of thought requires practice; that overtime offers relief and a more positive outlook.
Techniques mentioned in this article will help. For more information contact us.

Cognitive distortions, or distorted thinking, causes people to view reality in inaccurate, often negative, ways. Find out how to identify them and how to change these distortions.

“Children are naturally empathetic, so it’s easy for parents to cross the line unintentionally into “parentification”: t...
06/11/2023

“Children are naturally empathetic, so it’s easy for parents to cross the line unintentionally into “parentification”: the act of placing children in situations where they feel more like parents than children.”

https://www.facebook.com/100041955501346/posts/984163322992175/?mibextid=SDPelY

“Parentification” is when parents place children in situations where they must provide emotional support. This is very dangerous.

“In interviews for my forthcoming book on verbal abuse, the subject of scapegoating comes up with great regularity; amon...
01/05/2023

“In interviews for my forthcoming book on verbal abuse, the subject of scapegoating comes up with great regularity; among the forms of verbal abuse used by parents, scapegoating appears to have go-to status. In a family with a controlling, combative, or narcissistic parent at the helm, scapegoating is an effective tool to maintain control not just over the interactions and behaviors of family members but also over the family narrative.” - Peg Streep

https://www.facebook.com/100041955501346/posts/870427784365730/

Variations on a theme, but always about control and power.

“Dismissive parenting can impact the way you see yourself, others, and the world in general. Identifying the signs may h...
01/01/2023

“Dismissive parenting can impact the way you see yourself, others, and the world in general. Identifying the signs may help you heal.”

Having a dismissive mother while growing up can be a painful experience. This is how it can impact your adult life and how to start your healing process.

09/08/2022

Common Anxiety Myths

“There are many misconceptions and myths about Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD). We've compiled a list of 10 common myths and provided the reality for each of them. You can download this infographic with a comparison of the myths and realities of GAD, or you can read them below.”

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=763713868370456&id=100041955501346

The Internet abounds in information and misinformation about panic attacks.

https://www.facebook.com/100041955501346/posts/744924223582754/
08/15/2022

https://www.facebook.com/100041955501346/posts/744924223582754/

Dear Mum and Dad,

Please stick with me.

I can’t think clearly right now because there is a rather substantial section of my prefrontal cortex missing. It’s a fairly important chunk, something having to do with rational thought.

You see, it won’t be fully developed until I’m about 25. And from where I sit, 25 seems a long way off.

But here's what i want my parents to know..

My brain is not yet fully developed
It doesn’t matter that I’m smart; even a perfect score on my math test doesn’t insulate me from the normal developmental stages that we all go through.

Judgement and intelligence are two completely distinct things.
And, the same thing that makes my brain wonderfully flexible, creative and sponge-like also makes me impulsive. Not necessarily reckless or negligent but more impulsive than I will be later in life.

Please stick with me.

So when you look at me like I have ten heads after I’ve done something “stupid” or failed to do something “smart,” you’re not really helping.

You adults respond to situations with your prefrontal cortex (rationally) but I am more inclined to respond with my amygdala (emotionally). And when you ask, “What were you thinking?” the answer is I wasn’t, at least not in the way you are.

You can blame me, or you can blame mother nature, but either way, it is what it is.
At this point in my life, I get that you love me, but my friends are my everything.

Please understand that. Right now I choose my friends, but, don’t be fooled, I am watching you. Carefully.

Please stick with me.

Here’s what you can do for me

1. Model adulting.
I see all the behaviours that you are modeling and I hear all of the words you say. I may not listen but I do hear you. I seem impervious to your advice, like I’m wearing a Kevlar vest but your actions and words are penetrating. I promise. If you keep showing me the way, I will follow even if I detour many, many times before we reach our destination.

2. Let me figure things out for myself.
If you allow me to experience the consequences of my own actions I will learn from them. Please give me a little bit of leash and let me know that I can figure things out for myself. The more I do, the more confidence and resilience I will develop.

3. Tell me about you.
I want you to tell me all the stories of the crazy things you did as a teen, and what you learned from them. Then give me the space to do the same.

4. Help me with perspective.
Keep reminding me of the big picture. I will roll my eyes at you and make all kinds of grunt-like sounds. I will let you know in no uncertain terms that you can’t possibly understand any of what I’m going through. But I’m listening. I really am. It’s hard for me to see anything beyond the weeds that I am currently mired in. Help me scan out and focus on the long view. Remind me that this moment will pass.

5. Keep me safe.
Please remind me that drugs and driving don’t mix. Keep telling me that you will bail me out of any dangerous situation, no anger, no lectures, no questions asked. But also let me know over and over and over that you are there to listen, when I need you.

6. Be kind.
I will learn kindness from you and if you are relentless in your kindness to me, someday I will imitate that behaviour. Don’t ever mock me, please and don’t be cruel. Humour me-I think I know everything. You probably did as well at my age. Let it go.

7. Show interest in the things I enjoy.
Some days I will choose to share my interests with you, and it will make me feel good if you validate those interests, by at least acting interested.

One day when the haze of adolescence lifts, you will find a confident, strong, competent, kind adult where a surly teenager once stood. In the meantime, buckle in for the ride.

and..

Please stick with me.

Love,
Your Teenager ....
By Helene Wingens

“It’s common for young kids to have temper tantrums when they don’t get their way. But by the age of 8 or 9, tantrums ha...
08/05/2022

“It’s common for young kids to have temper tantrums when they don’t get their way. But by the age of 8 or 9, tantrums have tapered off for most kids.

When older kids have tantrums, people may see them as spoiled or disrespectful. The truth isn’t so simple, though. Tantrums happen for a reason.

As kids grow up, they typically develop language skills to express feelings like frustration and anger. They learn to negotiate for what they want. Most learn to handle strong emotions and cope with disappointment.

But some kids take longer to learn to handle strong emotions and cope with disappointment. They may struggle with self-control or anxiety, or have trouble putting feelings into words. These and other reasons can lead to older kids having frequent tantrums.”

https://www.facebook.com/377228065803930/posts/1958581174335270/

Por qué los niños mayores tienen rabietas ¿Se pregunta por qué un niño mayor sigue teniendo rabietas? Averigüe por qué algunos niños continúan teniendo rabietas cuando se hacen mayores.

“There are infinite types of OCD, it can impact on any thought, on any subject, on any person, on any fear, and frequent...
07/18/2022

“There are infinite types of OCD, it can impact on any thought, on any subject, on any person, on any fear, and frequently fixates on what’s important in a person’s life. For example, if religion is important to someone, OCD fixates on unwanted intrusive thoughts around religion, perhaps making the sufferer believe their actions/thoughts will offend their god. Another example is if someone begins a new relationship, OCD can make a person question that relationship, their feelings, their sexuality resulting in almost constant rumination, perhaps with the sufferer worrying that they may be misleading their partner.”

Types of OCD Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder presents itself in many guises, and certainly goes far beyond the common misconception that OCD is merely a little hand washing or checking light switches. Although those are valid OCD compulsions, such perceptions fail to acknowledge the distressing though...

Address

2615 Pacific Coast Highway , Suite 217
Hermosa Beach, CA
90254

Opening Hours

Monday 10am - 7pm
Tuesday 10am - 7pm
Wednesday 10am - 7pm
Thursday 10am - 7pm
Friday 10am - 7pm
Saturday 10am - 1pm

Telephone

+13105607883

Website

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