Alchemy Psychotherapy

09/08/2022

https://review.firstround.com/how-to-fix-the-co-founder-fights-youre-sick-of-having-lessons-from-couples-therapist-esther-perel

Renowned couples therapist Esther Perel now has her sights trained on helping a different kind of pair: co-founders in the startup world. Here, she reveals her playbook for resolving recurring conflicts and communication failures between co-founders by sharing her favorite techniques for getting to....

07/21/2022

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2022/jul/20/scientists-question-widespread-use-of-antidepressants-after-survey-on-serotonin?CMP=fb_gu&utm_medium=Social&utm_source=Facebook&fbclid=IwAR1g7zqCSbpK0ySA6SFx3b48p4BcutA44L6G6rUhC0WA186xoe1r9gi5gv4&fs=e&s=cl =1658316821

Researchers question use of antidepressants, prescribed to one in six UK adults

07/07/2022

https://www.theguardian.com/science/2021/aug/15/the-hidden-sense-shaping-your-wellbeing-interoception?fbclid=IwAR0kiCnqzCfboK_1ZbMoggKoJv6rU3JZuUBgixpje_cN6IaBr5792R5dmbo

There’s growing evidence that signals sent from our internal organs to the brain play a major role in regulating emotions and fending off anxiety and depression

02/07/2022

01/17/2022

“This talk is for anyone who has ever loved.”

https://www.ted.com/talks/esther_perel_rethinking_infidelity_a_talk_for_anyone_who_has_ever_loved?language=en

Infidelity is the ultimate betrayal. But does it have to be? Relationship therapist Esther Perel examines why people cheat, and unpacks why affairs are so traumatic: because they threaten our emotional security. In infidelity, she sees something unexpected — an expression of longing and loss. A mu...

12/13/2021

If you’re interested in learning just a little more about what actually goes on behind the scenes.

https://medium.com//ten-reasons-why-your-mental-health-provider-stopped-or-never-started-taking-your-health-insurance-4d7f23236483

by Dr. K. Hixson

08/09/2021

https://elemental.medium.com/why-yoga-can-be-triggering-for-trauma-survivors-8c687140525d

Your relationship to stillness affects your experience on the mat

06/22/2021

Enjoying the sensation of being alone requires that experience to be optional. Without the ability to go in and out of solitude, we simply become lonely. This is troubling because, as Gessen writes, “isolation is the enemy of solitude: when we cannot see our reflection in the eyes and ideas of others, the self disappears, and solitude turns into loneliness.”

Read more in the On Caring blog post "Solitude and Caring" Written By Brendan McInerney.

https://oncaring.org/blog/solitude-and-caring

05/30/2021

This is a keynote presentation converted into a movie for the NJSCSW workshop on narcissism, presented by Jeffrey Longhofer

04/21/2021

On Caring

People were abandoning the very sources of their individual agency.

03/24/2021

We live in an age of acceleration.

03/03/2021

A fascinating article on synchronicity.

Titled: Synchronicity: When Cosmos Mirror Inner Events.

https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Iona-Miller-2/publication/277161877_Synchronicity_When_Cosmos_Mirrors_Inner_Events/links/568d65d808aead3f42ed9e68/Synchronicity-When-Cosmos-Mirrors-Inner-Events.pdf?origin=publication_detail

10/15/2020

A reminder for domestic violence awareness month:

People will go to great lengths in order to have their needs met, both consciously and unconsciously.

We categorize people and give them labels to describe a core set of criteria, such as “borderline”, or “narcissist” (and a person very well may be) in order to offer a sense of comfort/reasoning about the way they people behave(d), or treat(ed) us. What‘s often missed are the questions about WHY people behave in that particular way.

Very often, people who meet criteria for these disorders have underlying traumas throughout their lives; attachment injuries, abandonment, high instances of betrayal/mistrust, and overall inconsistency in relationships (and much more) which has led to behavioral responses they may or may not be fully consciously aware of.

However, even knowing the WHY does not necessarily make whatever the person does “acceptable”. Knowledge around this is not meant to justify problematic, toxic, harmful and/or destructive behavior. The information that we have about trauma is not meant to discredit, or bypass the importance of setting boundaries, taking action steps to protect ourselves, and heighten our sense of safety in whatever way that is deemed important/necessary. We can find ourselves in a cycle of enabling/reinforcing these types of behaviors in relationship if we aren’t careful. This is all while recognizing that it is not always possible for someone to set boundaries and/or leave a domestic violence situation.

At any rate, with great consideration, understanding, compassion, and tolerance can follow GREAT exhaustion.

Here is the Statewide Domestic Violence Hotline number that provides information for domestic violence victims and others seeking information about domestic violence 24-hours a day, seven days a week. 1-800-572-SAFE (7233)

Wishing us all well and safe as we navigate ourselves within relationships, both now and always.

With genuine care,

Shayan Salar, LCSW

08/11/2020

"When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares."

-Henri J.M. Nouwen

06/04/2020

In lieu of recent events, we are not only reminded of the divide that exists in this country and around the world, but we are reminded of the individual differences between ourselves and people in our personal lives. For many, this type of information becoming more pronounced can be a lot to take in. Value conflicts can lead to a grieving process of sorts, a variety of intense oscillating emotional experiences, and shifts in relationship dynamics.
At Alchemy, we encourage discussions about people's unique experiences relative to their race, culture, background, gender identity, world-views, values, political beliefs, and/or any other diverse factors. No matter the present state of the world and current events, we support people's desire to seek an increased connection to their mind, body, relational, cultural, systemic, and spiritual needs. We simultaneously honor a person's right to self-determination by choosing not to seek, or examine any of the above. As Rumi said, "Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there." We are wishing everyone well and safe during these times and every other.

With care,

Shayan Salar, LCSW

06/04/2020

A few things to think about when considering online therapy.

https://www.alchemypsychotherapy.com/online-therapy

Some things to think about when considering online therapy.

06/03/2020

Why do therapy? What's the point? What is a the role of a therapist? How does it differ from a friendship? How might it help?

https://www.alchemypsychotherapy.com/therapy

Therapy is a very personal process. People are unique in how they relate to therapy, irrespective of if they have experienced it. We often receive messages from society, culture, and other's accounts, which frame how we think about it. Before starting, it can be helpful to ask yourself what typ...