04/30/2026
I don't believe in ultimatums. Here's why 👇
When you give someone an ultimatum you're basically attempting to manipulate their choices with fear tactics
Even if they "choose" you there will later be resentment down the road on their end
Also if they DON'T choose you over whatever it is you want them to stop doing and you're not truly ready to stand on business you're going to continue to give them access and you're going to resent them even though you're choosing to stay around
When you GENUINELY get to a place that you're ready to choose yourself and you're truly willing to walk away because it's BEST for you not in hopes or attempts to change someone else's behaviour that is when you present you present an "ultimatum" but at that point it's no longer an ultimatum because your goal is to look out for yourself not to change the other person's mind.
Prime example is I see alot is women blocking a man only to keep unblocking him wondering what his reaction is vs the woman who genuinely blocks a man for her own peace and doesn't care to check on whether he still cares or not.
My husband and I don't do ultimatums. We don't threaten or force each other to make decisions out of fear. We speak on our needs and desires. We're honest about where we are with each other. We BOTH genuinely care about our bond and each other enough to change our behaviour for the love and value of our marriage NOT because we're afraid.
